Congresswoman Carolyn B Maloney

I'm literally fine if I never hear the phrase, "she understood the assignment!!!!!" again but I will say that Carolyn read the invite and was like TIME TO TALK ABOUT AN AMERICAN LEXICON AND THAT LEXICON IS RIGHTS!

Congresswoman Carolyn B Maloney

And I think this is...well, fun is the wrong word but I like that she did it. If I have read the map correctly, the Met itself is in her district. MY congress person has never done this. YOU'RE UP, JUDY CHU!

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez in Brother Vellies and Aurora James

I am just going to ask that people not be lunatics in the comments about AOC wearing a dress that says TAX THE RICH on it. (I think she looks great.) She's there with Aurora James, the main designer of Brother Vellies, which she founded (per Wiki) "with the goal of keeping traditional African design practices and techniques alive." She's also the woman behind the Fifteen Percent Pledge. This seems like a very smart marriage of minds.

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez in Brother Vellies

I would like to hear what some of the rich at this event said when they saw this.

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez in Brother Vellies and Aurora James

The suiting detailing on this dress is smart and the fit is excellent; the white, I assume, is a nod to the suffragettes. (As AOC has done intentionally previously.)

Dan Levy in Loewe

I turn to Dan Levy's Instagram for his thoughts behind his look, which just FYI, does include some disturbing language: "I was fortunate enough to also get to work with [Jonathan Anderson] and the incredible team of designers and craftspeople at [Loewe] on a look that meant something to all of us. With support from the estate of American multimedia artist and LGBTQIA+ activist, David Wojnarovicz (1954-1992), Jonathan and the design team built upon an image of two men kissing from Wojnarovicz’s work, Fuck You F*ggot Fucker, named after a homophobic cartoon the artist had come across. But rather than feed on the message of hate, we wanted to celebrate queer love and visibility - acknowledging how hard artists like Wojnarovicz had to fight, while also presenting the imagery in a way that offered a hopeful message. Tonight, we’re celebrating the resilience, the love, and the joy of the community while honoring a crucial American voice that was taken from us too soon. To mark the collaboration, Loewe has made a donation to Visual AIDS, an organization Wojnarovicz supported, that continues to promote AIDS awareness and education." This is one of those looks where having this kind of background WHOLLY ENRICHES the experience of seeing it.

Lil Nas X in Versace

Lil Nas X turned to the Met's history of Dramatic Reveals and provided his own. And once again, I turn to Instagram for some background, this time Versace's: This is "a three-part LGBTQ+ American fairytale....He arrived on the red carpet in a dramatic cape that exudes regality and represents concealing one's true self. The cape was then shed to reveal gleaming Medusa-adorned armor, a symbol of protection from the prejudices faced as a Black, queer person. Finally, the armor is removed to reveal a skin-tight bodysuit that represents living life as your true, unguarded self." That's a lovely story to tell. He always puts on a good show. (I also decided that this is a salute to how much Americans enjoy a cape.)

Lil Nas X in Versace

A REVEAL! This made me think of Brandon Maxwell getting excited every time there was a reveal on Project Runway and how I'm surprised no one wore him. Maybe he was too booked between NYFW and the Emmys on Sunday?

Lil Nas X in Versace

In my notes, I called this "C3P0/suit of armor" and that seems true!

Lil Nas X in Versace

This is very well done and I'm also glad he didn't have to wear it all night because how can you really dance in this?

Lil Nas X in Versace

I don't have any shots of him changing into this -- he may have left and come back -- but this is going to be much more comfortable for dinner.

Lil Nas X in Versace

Front AND back!

Billie Eilish in Oscar de la Renta

OdlR actually had a pretty good showing last night (which makes sense.) And this is a lovely one; apparently Billie only agreed to wear the brand if they agreed to stop selling fur. And they DID. Good for her! (The NYT has a really interesting piece on this.)

Billie Eilish in Oscar de la Renta

The workmanship on this dress is DREAMY. It's so LIGHT! She said, on the red carpet, that it was inspired by "Holiday Barbie" but for me, it's Peaches and Cream Barbie all the way.

Billie Eilish in Oscar de la Renta

The way this train just floats is really something else. Well done, all!

Jennifer Lopez in Ralph Lauren

This is like the polar opposite of that, and yet I remain delighted. Heather pointed out on Twitter that this is an update of something J-Lo wore in 2004 and it just makes me laugh. It's also VERY Ralph Lauren and ergo -- properly on theme.

Jennifer Lopez in Ralph Lauren

JENNIFER. YOU ARE WEARING SO MANY ACCESSORIES. (She made it clear on her Insta that her fur is faux.) (Ralph noted, "the look is completed with a combination of vintage accessories, including a Navajo stamped silver cuff and ring, and silver jewelry from the Ralph Lauren archives," which is neat.)(And don't worry, Ben was there -- he just met her inside and didn't walk the red carpet, which means Venice really WAS their debut. Is Anna enraged that she didn't get that press hit? Can she be in a fight with Marc Jacobs and J.Lo at the same time? She's but one person!)

Jennifer Lopez

I feel ROBBED that I didn't get to see J Lo take this hat off her head and jauntily skim it across the top of a saloon bar, coming to a halt in front of a depressed Ben Affleck, whose life is about to drastically improve.

Debbie Harry in Zac Posen

THIS is fantastic. She looks rad and thoughtful and also I feel like this is what Madonna could be going for if she wanted to. (I really thought Madonna would come to this!) Posen always shows up for the Met Gala -- even though I thought he was out of business. He perhaps is just doing custom stuff.

Zac Posen and Debbie Harry in Zac Posen

A gentleman!

Hunter Schafer in Prada

Noted American designer....Prada??? Also, this is more apt for Halloween than the Met Gala but it is admittedly very cool and INTERESTING. (The face piece is NOT Prada, to my knowledge, but I haven't seen a credit yet. YES, she's also got totally white contacts in. Listen, Americans DO love Halloween! Heidi Klum is INSPIRED right now.) (PS: Her manicure is amazing.)

Hunter Schafer in Prada

She definitely looks cool in this; Law Roach styled her for this event.

Naomi Osaka in Louis Vuitton

Sometimes LV is VERY boring and predictable; sometimes LV's custom work is really interesting and creative, and this is the latter. I will say that I am VERY surprised that the hosts of the gala weren't all expected to wear American designers, but Naomi has an LV contract, so....And having said that, Naomi's sister Mari helped design this, and her design notes are really interesting.

Naomi Osaka in Louis Vuitton

And on a night when it felt like a lot of people sort of half-assed it, this is a REAL MET GALA LOOK. (I actually think she looks amazing inside, too.) Her whole team had really interesting and thoughtful takes on their vision for this evening, like this one from her hair stylist.

Serena Williams in Gucci

I love Serena so please know this is coming from a place of love but I'm going to have to give her a mixed review. I do love this cape. It's so glam! And her head looks great.

Serena Williams and Alexis Ohanian

But I don't love the lace catsuit -- although I kind of like the idea, of course, of Serena wearing something superhero-y. I think if I were in charge, I would have wanted to see her in something sleeker. Like, what about Serena Williams in vintage Calvin Klein?

Kim Petras in Collina Strada

This is a lot.

Frank Ocean in Prada

I do not know why Frank Ocean decided to bring a green animatronic baby!!! (Even Vogue was like "yeah, we don't know.")

Simone Biles in Area and Athleta

Simone! Vogue had a great article about this dress, which weighs 88 pounds. It's part athleisure, part homage to Josephine Baker, and the workmanship is INSANE. It's also three pieces, so she can take the train off and party.

Simone Biles in Area and Athleta

Her hair and makeup is superb.

Simone Biles in Area and Athleta

I wonder if this is a LEETLE overwhelming on her, although it looks amazing on the stairs. Even if so, she is having a good couple of days -- she looked fab at the VMAs, too.

Cara Delevingne in Christian Dior

Alrightie, settle down. (Someone on Twitter pointed out that it's lame to associate various sexual acts with punishment and I agree that this feels....like it's trying too hard, at best. It fits well, but I dunno. I think this is a bit of a mess, honestly.)

Kim Kardashian in Balenciaga

OH MY GOD KIM. This is amazing. Like, not really in the good way but also MAYBE in the good way? Like it might have come all the way around to being amazing? It prompted so many Twitter jokes, including ones about Dementors and about sleep paralysis demons. Is she, like....THE YAWNING VOID OF OUR SHARED EXISTENTIAL CRISIS???

Kim Kardashian in Balenciaga

IS SHE OUR NATIONAL DEPRESSION? IS SHE COVID? IS SHE DEATH!?!?!?! (Does she know Balenciaga is not American?)

Kim Kardashian in Balenciaga

At least her ponytail gets to swing free. I hope she got to let her face out for dinner. I keep thinking of her trying to have a conversation with her mother with her face absolutely covered in a giant compression sock. HOW CAN SHE EAT THE PASSED APPS IN THIS? It is silly. (Someone on her Insta posted, "respectfully, what is going on?" and I can't top that.)

Megan Rapinoe in Sergio Hudson and Edie Parker

Hello, this is a massive tonal shift. Kim is the YAWNING VOID OF OUR NATIONAL CLINICAL DEPRESSION and Megan is like "I feel pretty good, actually!!!" The stars on her fingers!

Megan Rapinoe in Sergio Hudson and Edie Parker

Anyway, I love this. It's like Wonder Woman has a board meeting. (Karla Welch styled this and she always does really sharp work for the Met Gala -- I think she enjoys getting to dress people to a thoughtful theme.)

Hailee Steinfeld

Hello, this is Hailee Steinfeld. (She hasn't had anything done to her face, but this hair and makeup changes her appearance so much!)

Hailee Steinfeld in Iris Van Herpen

I'm not kidding but I thought she was Rita Ora for a second?

Hailee Steinfeld in Iris Van Herpen

I have no idea what this dress has to do with the theme, but this dress IS cool. (She is usually more on-theme, traditionally. People are rusty!)

Rihanna in Balenciaga!

And we have arrived at Rihanna! Listen, as ALWAYS, her face looks spectacular. Her head is gorgeous. I will note that I was really surprised that she went with Balenciaga -- it's couture, but not custom, which is also surprising -- given that Rihanna is generally very VERY thoughtful about interpreting the theme. Vogue wrote of this look, "its black ruffles and voluminous scale were a chic interpretation of all-American style." ARE THEY? I guess....Americans....wear black? (I think that was just a Vogue.com writer being like "I DON'T KNOW. SURE. THAT SOUNDS GOOD.")

Rihanna in Balenciaga

I will say that I think the sort of Roaring 20s silhouette here IS very beautiful. But Rihanna has, perhaps, set our expectations for her too high at this event. I also just realized I didn't get a photo of ASAP Rocky in his quilt other than him floating there behind her. But you get the gist. His quilt is by ERL, which is a Venice-beach based designer and honestly THIS feels VERY American to me.

Rihanna and ASAP Rocky

His suit underneath is Balenciaga, though. And this is apparently their debut as a couple on a red carpet -- I feel like we've seen so much of them in candids that I didn't realize that. So Anna DID an A-list couple reveal at this after all!

Rihanna and ASAP Rocky

The inside of his quilt is also very cool; I wish more people had leaned into the America Arts and Crafts of it all.

Rihanna and ASAP Rocky

They do have an incredibly affectionate body language with each other. I just want Rihanna to be happy!

The 2021 Met Gala FINALLY Arrived, And Some Folks Wanted to Make a Statement

We've got Message Outfits (metaphorically, and literally), feathered capes, suits of armour, robot babies, designer blackmail, A HORSE HEAD, Kim Kardashian's ENTIRE HEAD COVERED...and more.  SO much more.