Bradie Tennell Short Program

I like to play a game when I haven't seen a skating program, and try to guess to what they are skating simply from their outfit. I crossed my fingers that this was, somehow, Batman-related. But it's a Florence + the Machine song, which is actually way better, and she NAILED THIS. It has a triple-triple and she got the highest short program score ever for a Nationals skate. (A stat which I have to think is based on what I still think of "the new scoring system" only.) It's really a shame there wasn't an audience for this, because I think they would have gone wild for it. She also wore a really cute gold sequined mask in the kiss and cry, which I appreciated.

Bradie Tennell, long program

This appears as it it were more traditional -- both ensemble and routine, as I believe it's using music about Kosovo. It's VERY lovely and very dramatic.

Amber Glenn, short program

I just learned on Wikipedia that Amber is pansexual/bisexual and the only out LGBTQIA woman in US skating. Good for her!

Amber Glenn, long program

This is lovely. And apparently, although Amber finished second, Karen Chen is going to World's....

Karen Chen, short program

...and looking at the scores from this event, it seems like Karen ALMOST snuck into second place. Please do let us know all about any and all drama surrounding this choice. I will say that although Karen got the bronze here, I do give her my gold metal for costumes.

Karen Chen, long program

This costume is GORGEOUS. She's skating here to The Butterfly Lovers' Violin Concerto, which is a very famous piece of Chinese classical music. You can see a lot of these programs on NBC's YouTube, but this skate wasn't one of them, unfortunately.

Karen Chen, long program

This is DREAMY.

Alexa Knierim/Brandon Frazier, short program

Let's zip over to pairs, where I decided that this was going to be a "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" routine. It was....to Linkin Park. Also feels right.

Alexa Knierim and Brandon Frazier, free skate

They BOTH used to skate with other partners -- Alexa's former partner, her husband, retired -- and given that they won this, and set a scoring record, it seems like it's working out okay. (His former partner does not seem to have retired but also doesn't have a new partner yet, that I can tell? Please give us the scoop.)

Jessica Calalang/Brian Johnson, pairs short program

Jessica and Brian seem to go for the "Let's Just Have Him Blend Into the Background" genre of male partner skater outfits. This skate was Game of Thrones inspired, which feels a little dated, and I think they skated the same program LAST year too? (I mean, I say "dated" about a sport where someone skates to Carmen every year, but still.) I believe there was a lot of repetition of routines this year because the pandemic made it hard to learn and practice new ones.

Jessica Calalang and Brian Johnson, long program

But THIS is a new (I think!) Queen program and I am clearly here for that. Queen is GREAT for skating, it's so deliciously bombastic.

Ashley Cain-Gribble and Timothy LeDuc, pairs short program

WHAT is happening HERE? Please let it be "Grease." (It's actually a cover of INXS's "Never Tear Us Apart," which...I love that song but do these outfits make sense with it? Maybe? I'd have gone full grunge.)

Ashley Cain-Gribble and Timothy LeDuc, long program

This photo just made me laugh. It's so SKATERLY. (This routine is to Rachmaninoff, which is also very skaterly.) Also, please help me figure out who his face reminds me of. Is it...Jared Leto?

Ashley Cain-Gribble and Timothy LeDuc, long program

WHEEEEE!

Madison Hubbell and Zachary Donohue, short dance

And over to the ice dancers, who always do something notable with their outfits. Madison Hubbell and Zachary Donohue baaaaaaarely won this, it seems -- it's exciting to have good ice dancers and tight competition! -- and I....have real concerns about what Madison is wearing.

Madison Hubbell and Zachary Donohue, short dance

And then I learned that this routine is set to music from the film BURLESQUE! Well! Forget what I just said. I AM IN!

Madison Hubbell and Zachary Donohue, free dance

They did a massive tonal change for the free dance, as I believe this entire thing is a salute to Leonard Cohan's Hallelujah. (Fun fact: If my intal is correct, their new choreographer is Scott Moir. Are Virtue and Moir mega-fans of Xtina in Burlesque? Because I love that.)

Madison Chock and Evan Bates, short dance

I CANNOT resist this sort of costume -- the We're Going to a Gatbsy-Themed NYE Party Look -- and Madison's red lip is perfecto. (They're doing a Cole Porter routine, which I HAVE seen, as it's the same one they did last season. I guess Madison lost a lot of training time because she had a concussion? Everyone, stay strong!)

Madison Chock and Evan Bates, free dance

This program is called "Egyptian Snake Dance," hence her dress, and is also from last season, and yet I do not remember it. How is that possible? It looks very memorable!

Kaitlin Hawayek and Jean-Luc Baker, short dance

YES, this is all disco, including "Staying Alive," and I guessed one right!!

Kaitlin Hawayek and Jean-Luc Baker, short dance

I salute his commitment to the era-correct chest hair.

Kaitlin Hawayek and Jean-Luc Baker, free dance

Here, they look like two very dramatic beat poets. Folks you have to invite to your party but know they're going to make everything into a THING.

Nathan Chen, short program

And, as ever, we shall close with the men. Nathan Chen, it seems, KICKED EVERYONE'S ASS -- his score is so much higher than the second and third place finishers! He is, here, wearing the traditional I Just Went to Banana Republic For This costume.

Nathan Chen, long program

I like Nathan so much; Wiki just informed me that here, "he became the first man to win five consecutive National titles since [Dick] Button, who won seven straight from 1946 to 1952." That's huge! GOOD FOR YOU, NATHAN! You also have fantastic hair.

Vincent Zhou, short program

Vincent Zhou was the only man in the top three to try any kind of costume-y costume, and I appreciate that from him.

Vincent Zhou, long program

Thank you for providing SOME zazz.

Jason Brown, short program

Once a real bringer of Zazz, I see Jason Brown -- who does NOT have short hair in my mind -- has also turned to Beat Poet Style during the pandemic.

Jason Brown, long program

I'll take it!

Toepick! It's the US Figure Skating National Championships

It's BACK!