
Start as you mean to go on, they say, and Ab Fab certainly did, as the very first shot of the show is Eddy being rudely awakened by her alarm, to which she reacts by chugging the rest of last night's wine....

...before putting on an INSANE pantsuit which is emblazoned LACROIX (sweetie darling) across the collarbone.

Eddy is NOT opposed to mixing patterns, as we see in this one episode alone. Bubble here looks vaguely normal -- slightly proto-Cher Horowitz, but just wait. JUST WAIT. Anyway, Eddy is organizing a fashion show, and as you can imagine, everything is in arrears. Eddy was informed that they had gotten Princess Diana for the front row, but is informed by Bubble that ACTUALLY it's Princess Anne. "The only label SHE wears is DRIP DRY," Patsy notes from the sofa, and I laughed aloud. (Later, there is an amazing throwaway line that Edina got Anne into "a Vivienne Westwood basque," which is basically a long-line corset. This show is brilliant.)

It will not surprise you that Eddy and Patsy, high off the thrill of shoving Princess Anne into a merry-widow, promptly get loaded with a bunch of stripes-loving male models, and...

....fall out of their cab on the way home, where Saffy is obviously waiting, cranky in her bathroom, for them to arrive safely. The best part of this shot, though, and the main reason I included it, is that you can see that Patsy's white body suit is flapping around the outside of her trousers. Young readers: NOTHING says "1992" like "I got drunk in a bodysuit and realized that re-snapping it and putting my pants back on over it was too much work so I just let it hang out."

We've all been there.
In this episode, Eddy is very upset that she's gained weight (a running theme), especially because a mean and glamorous rival of hers is back in town and she cannot allow herself to be seen bursting out of her jeans.

Luckily, Patsy is dating a himbo trainer who attempts to whip Eddy into shape whilst Pats smokes and reads magazines (Patsy's suggestion, obviously, was a quick spot of lipo). It will not surprise you that Eddy and her Pucci-esque leggings cannot do a sit-up. She cannot even lift her head from a prone position. (In a later season, we get a bit of a callback to this when Eddy re-does her bedroom in a traditional Japanese style and is delighted to be able to just literally roll out of bed into the bathroom.)

We will see this necklace from Eddy A LOT; at least twice a season. I believe this is also the episode where Bubble makes a lot of proclamations about how HOOOOOORIBLE Ivana Trump's hair is, to Patsy's simmering rage (for the youngs: Patsy basically does her hair, EXACTLY like Ivana circa this time period.)

It me.

Given the failure of Eddy's diet and exercise scheme, you can imagine her GLEEFUL DELIGHT when she learns that her rival...HAS GONE BLIND! (Which also explains why said rival is wearing this.) Eddy then of course ruins everything by gleefully screaming, "I'M THIN!!!" and....taking Penny Caspar-Morse's hands and running them all over her body before she's realized what she's doing.

Fun fact: This jacket makes an appearance in season four on the actress who plays Edina in Saffron's play about her life. A great bit of continuity despite being deployed years apart. Also: Eddy wore that necklace in the previous episode. Also, you should just assume that Saffy is wearing some version of this at ALL TIMES.

Patsy and Edina are off to France for some reason, wherein they are miserable in a hovel because they mistook an abandoned house in the village for their B&B. Pats has never looked more like Ivana than she does here. That GIANT studded suede jacket was actually rather stylish for the period. I promise.

OBVIOUSLY if you're going to be spending a weekend in a tiny French village, you have to wear a head scarf and a giant beige artist's smock. In certain shots, Eddy seriously looks like she might be on her way to the new season of Outlander.

Pats, on the other hand, is wearing four blankets and clutching a magazine and a wine glass.

WHAT IS ON EDDY'S HEAD? (Here, she is arguing with customs because they've been caught with a mass amount of drugs...half of which turn out to actually be sugar, to Patsy's great rage. She paid a lot of money for those drugs!)

This episode all proves to be an hallucination that Eddy has whilst she's in her isolation tank, which is one of the reasons Bubble is so normal and competent (which everyone finds terribly alarming).

School flashbacks are always funny. (As back of Eddy's hallucination, she and Patsy attend/ruin a presentation of Saffy's at her school, in part when the several Romanian orphans Edina has adopted -- which were a ruse to stick it to Saffy, obviously, that she then could not undo -- arrive.)

Because you needed to see Eddy in her wetsuit. (She decides to get rid of her isolation tank, in part because of the horrible hallucination in which Bubble is competent and she, Eddy, is responsible for six babies, but mostly because Pats informs her that Fergie has one.)

This seems about right.

I confess to loving Patsy's Chanel AND her many many bracelets. (All the scenes with Patsy's magazine cohorts are funny. They have pitch meetings like, "I'm thinking CHAIRS.")

We've all been there.

It's Eddy's birthday, and Patsy is -- as you might guess from her ensemble -- cavorting with a hot younger man who rides a motorcycle. (There is a really funny moment where the biker drives back and forth in front of Eddy's house while she looks out the window, and Pats is in a different configuration on his bike each time, including straddling him while he drives.)

Learning in this episode that Eddy, here is YOUNGER THAN I AM made me too want to put on a velour sweatsuit and drink wine in my own bathroom.

When season two opens, Patsy is in a terrible scandal, having had an affair with a married MP. There are some AMAZINGLY funny bits where everyone is reading the tabloid headlines about it -- one of them calls her an "glossy mag slag," which is brilliant -- and yadda yadda yadda, she decides that she needs to get a facelift before she sells her exclusive story to Hello. I hope it goes without saying that her facelift and the story go HORRIBLY WRONG -- much as did Eddy's attempt to mix patterns here.

What's Eddy wearing? She has strapped a papoose to herself as a way to get the Hello reporter to cover the shop Eddy's running on the side, in which she solely sells "tiny beautiful things" she's sourced from a variety of war-torn countries and oppressed indigenous peoples, obviously.

You'll be relieved to know that Eddy recovers from her birthday blues in time to get drunk and perform terrible karaoke with Patsy whilst wearing a truly garish and deeply hilarious catsuit.

(a) WHAT IS EDDY WEARING, (b) please note the visual gag in which the nurse has a HUGE container for cigarette ash, and (c) this nurse pops up later as well, and her acidic disdain for everything Eddy ever does pleases me greatly.

Please take a close look at Eddy's hideous and horrible (and very funny) tee shirt.

I couldn't resist bringing you this cameo from Helena Bonham Carter, who is Saffy in Eddy's under-anesthetic hallucinations. (Her gay husband takes the form of Richard E Grant, and her mother is, to quote Bridget Jones, "Germaine sodding Greer.")

It may surprise you to learn that this is not a fashion statement. But it will NOT surprise you to learn that it's an attempt on Eddy's part to lose weight. (It does not work. Her body actually ABSORBS the mud she's wrapped herself in and made her fatter.)

This is the episode in which Eddy's father dies and her response is predictably ridiculous and also very funny. She goes out in this ALL GOLD suit and buys all matter of HIDEOUS art (including a mobile of hangers that everyone keeps using to hang up their coats).

She also has a crisis in yet another of her oversized, terrible, hilarious tee shirts in which she moans to Saffy that SHE doesn't want to die.

You should know that Patsy is wearing white cowboy boots with this. You should also know that Eddy's Madonna costume here is more apt than ever, as she (briefly) convinces Saffy that she's dealing with her grief by saying, "Life is a mystery. Everyone must die alone." (Saffy thinks this is a lovely sentiment until Eddy credits it to the source.)

And, of course, this is the episode wherein Patsy and Edina show up super drunk to the funeral and BOTH fall into open graves. Which you'd think would be comedic overkill (no pun intended) but somehow isn't.

AMAZING.

THIS is a jumpsuit. And, yes, this is the infamous episode where the entire crew goes to Morocco, where things go about as terribly as you would imagine, and Eddy and Pats suffer -- as usual -- mightily for their bad behavior. (This is clearly with the second Sex and the City movie was going for, and missed horribly. Although Carrie Bradshaw might have worn this, she never would have allowed herself to look quite this ridiculous in it, I don't think.)

Pats obviously spends this entire trip looking like old school Banana Republic, and Saffy looks like an anthropologist. (She also gets groped by their host and no one seems to care, but gets hers back when she later spends the remainder of the trip hooking up with the hot dude...

...right here.)

This seems about right.

I will note that I think Pats has NEVER looked better than she does here, and could wear this today. Also, throughout this segment, Eddy slowly ends up wearing more and more clothing until she's in a full caftan at the end of it.

Yes, this is my current Facebook profile picture.

Pats is in Morocco to shoot something for the magazine, and just let me say that they started the day like this and ended it looking MUCH THE WORSE FOR WEAR.

I would legit wear this coat. I am a little concerned I might be turning into Eddy.

Please note this extreme pattern mixing...

...followed by THIS extreme pattern mixing, and this isn't even the first time she's worn this!

Eddy looks like she's auditioning for a lead singer gig in a Jamiroquai cover band.

It should surprise no one that I kind of love Patsy's outfit here. I also owned Eddy's sunglasses in 1994.

ICONIC, sweetie darling.

In which Patsy models a classic, round-one, Herve Leger bandage dress.

Season three opens with Eddy having invested in a contraption that exercises FOR YOU.

This season, Lacroix gives way to the mid-90s version of athleisure, in which Eddy wears a LOT of tracksuit-inspired numbers and a LOT of DKNY.

Both those jackets are amazing, and also amazing is that Patsy's sister Jackie is played by Kate O’Mara, who also played Alexis Carrington Colby's sister on Dynasty. She died a couple of years ago, and I must raise my bolly to her. To play the sister of both Alexis AND Patsy bespeaks a certain glorious je ne sais quoi in an actress. (Fun trivia, that part was originally intended for Charlotte Rampling.)

You should know that Saffy wears this color-blocked sweatshirt all the time. You should also know that I think you can wipe down Eddy's outfit with a damp sponge. (Which might have been something that Saffy herself snarked; one of the reasons this show works so well, I think, is that while Patsy and Eddy are mean to Saffy, Saffy is also VERY MEAN to them. Her khakis are horrible, but she can hold her own.)

Eddy has realized she's been ages since she's had sex, so obviously she and Pats decide to have an orgy with two hired professionals, and what else are you supposed to wear to an orgy?

The orgy does not happen -- but there is an amazing visual gag where Sex Worker #1 gives Sex Worker #2 some spray that's meant for his junk and he sprays it into his mouth, mistaking it for Binaca, and then has to spend an entire scene with his tongue sticking straight out, in the background. It's SO naughty and funny. EDITED TO NOTE: Said gentleman, to the right of this frame...IS APPARENTLY IDRIS ELBA. Excuse, I'm going to go fire myself for not recognizing him.

Speaking of Joan Collins, I think she wore that dress Pats has got on. Eddy is in Vivienne Westwood and looks predictably bonkers. (This episode has another great running joke in that Naomi Campbell is guest starring as herself, and there are several little bits where she behaves absolutely normally and pleasantly, and everyone who turns away from her grumbles, "MY GOD she's a nightmare.")

Told you there was a lot of DKNY!

I don't think it will surprise you to find out that somehow this all ends up with Patsy and Edina on a garbage barge (a garbarge?) in the middle of the Thames. At least Eddy's suit will make it very easy for the river police to locate her!

NO ONE has more lounge-wear than Eddy, which is a trait I admire.

That necklace has been around for several seasons, and somewhere Sporty Spice is longing for that dress on Eddy.

In the season three finale, Eddy and Pats have a falling out and Edina goes to a BRUTAL yoga retreat -- seen here -- and Pats takes a job in New York, until Eddy misses her too much and rescues her.

It will not surprise you that the streetwalkers of old Times Square thinks Pats looks smashing.

It will also not surprise you that she's drinking Stoli out of a bottle on a rooftop in a white suit that ends in CULOTTES.

And the season ends -- well, for us watching on Hulu; Saffy gets engaged in a special episode that isn't on streaming between this episode and the next -- with a look at Old Eddy and Pats, who we will also see later. Old Eddy sort of looks like my own grandmother. Who actually sort of also acted like Eddy, now that I think about it...
And now I am turning coverage over to Heather:

Thrillingly, Season 4 brought with it a two-minute Marilyn Manson phase. It might be the fandom Patsy was born to join. One white contact lens weirdly suits her.
Also, Eddie is wearing a Slipknot hat. I had no idea Slipknot was a thing in 2001.

This outfit was clearly totally incomplete without the Carrie Bradshaw flower.

Eddie put this on to go on a date, and so of course she's lying down working on her pelvic floor. Her lower half is dressed as a cheesy postcard.

Patsy loves a classic monochrome suit. Edina loves looking like a twelve-year old from 1985. One thing you realize from bingeing on this show is, at least in the last three seasons, how much stuff they repeated. We see this denim vest again on the hanger, and I think possibly one more time besides.

Patsy was also a repeater. Which is fine. Sometimes the classics never go out of style, eh, Pats? Her purse here is fantastic. Eddie had just been doing yoga... in cargo pants.

Possibly the most gleefully deranged deployment of Burberry's iconic plaid.

Patsy also loves her animal print, but what felt REALLY important to show you was that Edina paired that jacket with knee socks and pumps -- a bit of insanity that we've actually now seen on runways, and not too long ago, either.

For the most part we've left out guest stars, but I HAD TO show you this one. That is none other than Lady Victoria Hervey, who was in 2001 at least well-enough known in the UK to play herself. (She had one line. She was not great.) So the next time she appears on this site in something highly questionable, you can pretend you totally remember her from her AbFab appearance.

I am in love with how much Patsy looks like a spy here. I now CRAVE the ability to go back in time and make an AbFab James Bond movie. She would be SO FUNNY in that.

I laugh out loud every time I get to this slide.

And naturally, Eddie paired that banana shirt with tiger pants and a hot pink visor, jacket, and purse. Eddie never lacks for accessories. Because she never met one she didn't immediately put on.

This is from a dream sequence in which Patsy is imagining a renewed career in modeling. It's both hilarious, secretly awesome, and hugely reminiscent of that ANTM season two shoot where Yoanna wore a motorcycle helmet. Still one of my favorite Top Model pics.

I love this photo so much.

Edina is wearing this creepy-ass shirt of a person smiling in braces. It's from a video selfie, which is why the angle is so bizarre. Not that it isn't ALL bizarre.

Pats looks great, per usual. Edina... apparently really REALLY likes clothes with bananas on them.

This is almost NORMAL-looking.

Much better. Patsy is the fabulous, and Edina... is the absolutely, in the sense that she's never anything less than ABSOLUTELY committed to an aesthetic. (Here, she was going to a workout boot camp.)

Everyone made fun of this dress on the show for being too tight -- the episode was all about Eddie losing weight, which is an interesting thing to see 15 years later when those are topics people don't touch -- but I actually thought she looked like a total babe.

That jacket on Eddie looks like a finger-painting accident. Or MURDER EVIDENCE.

I cherish the flashbacks -- here, it was Saffy remembering a time that Patsy and Eddie took her to a playground and then proceeded to romp around on it themselves while Saffy stood off to the side in overalls. I really love that Patsy looks like David Bowie in Labyrinth and Edina looks like a cross between Bette Midler in "Ruthless People" and Helena Bonham Carter.

Patsy Stone, mistress of subtlety; Edina Monsoon, mistress of odd lids.

See? Another one for your pleasure.

I was rather surprised to see Edina washing her own car, although that is clearly the outfit she'd do it in (it's a coat and jeans she repeats a lot. See? Recycling did not begin nor end with Kate Middleton.)

Eddie's suit here has the symbol for men all over it.

And her necklaces are WHOA, but it's the sunglasses that really got me. They are the right size for a six-year old. Bless.

More elderly Edina and Patsy. Note the reappearance of the purple flower from earlier in the season. I do wholly believe Edina would never give away ANY of her belongings. She's totally a clothes hoarder, right? So of course she still has that. But I might call foul on Patsy wearing yellow satin. I know it's their show, but still. Maybe Old Patsy goes colorblind.

The tackiest person in the rodeo luxury box.

This was from a plotline where Patsy's hormones were all wonkus, and it turned her into a delightful homemaker. Again, reader, I laughed.

Question: Do we open every season with Eddie passed out in her bed? I think seasons five and six both started that way, and now I can't recall if season four did, too. (Jess was our seasons 1-3 binger, so maybe she can weigh in. [Hi! At least two of the three did. Pats has also been eating in bed this entire time.- J]) Anyway, she brought her nicest Pucci-esque headscarf to this particular occasion, along with some snacks.

Eddie LOVES a Breton stripe, so clearly she's invited to Drinks With Broads. I don't know what makes me laugh more: the super high-waisted belled pants, the sailor hat, or the tan.

Jennifer Saunders is a freaking international treasure.

Eddie had this flowy shirt that I actually secretly like and wish I could stash away for when I'm in that phase of my life.

This is all... shockingly sporty for these two. Who have no good portmanteau. Edinsy? Patina? No, and no.

I just thought this was funny. Joanna Lumley is a comedic genius, and for as immobile as Patsy sometimes likes to make her face, Lumley can move hers in the most majestic ways.

There is so much happening in this shot, I wouldn't even know where to start.

Current mood.

I actually want Minnie Driver's cape. The subplot of this was that Patsy convinced Minnie she was a stylist, and Minnie is constantly demanding freebies from anyone and everyone. And the thing is, I might hire Patsy as my stylist. She could turn out to be exceptional.

I think I kept this one in for the bracelet and giant necklace, which is of course partly obscured by the wine bottle, which... feels right.

Oh, Eddie. You look like an inflatable chair.

These two turned out to be a dab shot on their hunting weekend, but would YOU ever have handed either of them a rifle?

Patsy's blouse... is the loudest thing she may ever have worn. To the point where I feel like I need to check whether she borrowed it from Eddie. For her part, Edina is in a robe that she wears a LOT on the show. I appreciate the attention to pajamas.

A magnificent bird atop a magnificent bird. I want to experience this sight forever.

Little Bo Peep lost her sheep, so she said, "Screw it," and went to Harrods.

This outfit is Eddie in a nutshell. It's loud, it's hilarious, it's insane, it is a tiny bit confused about itself, and it pulls focus from everything around it.

Well, from ALMOST everything. Patsy HAS just borrowed all this from Edina because Saffy's water broke all over the red suit, and Eddie's response to this sight is basically, "Well, it works on ME." Patsy looks like if Madonna and Betsey Johnson mashed themselves together.

Eddie looks both amazing, and -- in the sunglasses region, at least -- like Doc Brown in Back to the Future 2. And is Patsy wearing a Juicy hoodie?!?

Eddie! This is another actual good suit. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU.

This is far more awful. Thank you.

You, too, might wear that outfit if you were mixing Bom(bay Sapphire) and bubbly.

I am unclear why neither Jess nor I owns one of these.

Eddie's weird sporty phases always amuse me.

I will not be mad if I look like this at her age.

BRETON AHOY. ONE OF US. ONE OF US.

My favorite detail of this furry cardigan is what looks like a Varsity letter jacket's H patch.

This was a Christmas episode in which Patsy was in hospital the whole time (she flatlines and then wakes up after being zapped by saying, effectively, "Oh, that's good, isn't it"). That Edina would wear this head scarf and white fingerless gloves to visit her infirm friend is delightful.

"You look like your jeans exploded," said Eddie's mum. Can't add much to that.

The bucket hat and the giant cross are so perfect. Never change, Eddie.

Eddie looks like the head of a glow-stick cult.

And here, the High Priestess of the Church of the Confused Flappers and Flower Children.

The Hamburgler's mother.

... is that belt from winning a Valentine's Day prizefight at Liberty?

Emma Bunton makes several cameos in the later seasons, which means they must have liked working with her. This pleases me enormously. As does Eddie's outfit. The best thing about this show is how -- with the occasional exception -- people just don't even react to Eddie's clothes. It increases the viewer's feeling of, "AM I TAKING CRAZY PILLS OR IS THIS HAPPENING?"

Ketchup and Mustard: A Love-Hate Story.

Saffy has just returned from visiting her daughter in Africa, and this is Patsy's reaction (to her PRESENCE, not her garb). Again I say: I cherish you, Joanna Lumley.

Do I need one of these?

Another great dressing gown from Edina.

Followed by a suit I WOEFULLY failed you on; basically, it's pants and a suit coat with a knee-length black and white shirt. It's very Johnny Depp Runs A Circus.

Yes, that is a massive necklace over her caftan, not a sewn-on detail. Sometimes I think Eddie is only happy if her outfit makes noise when she moves.

They wore this to an Olympics party. Obviously.

This is how I hope Jessica and I will watch all the Olympics festivities this year.

Shine on, you crazy, crazy diamonds. You were passing the Bechdel Test before that thing was even a glint in Alison Bechdels eye, and for that -- and every photo in this slideshow -- we thank you from the bottom of our shriveled hearts.
