Actors Erupted In Pattern at the SAG Awards

Mary J. Blige in Jean-Louis Sabaji

Mary J. Blige at the SAG Awards — Mandatory Credit: Photo by John Salangsang/REX/Shutterstock (9327718jw) Mary J. Blige 24th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, USA - 21 Jan 2018

Okay, I realize we're kicking off with something that isn't TECHNICALLY a pattern, but it IS an embellishment. And it counts. IT COUNTS DAMMIT. Mostly, I wanted to start with Mary J. because she looks FLAWLESS. I only wish for a slightly deeper lipstick, but honestly, that dress is majestic and so who cares. I am not familiar with this designer -- and certainly MJB and Law Roach could've pulled from anyone at all -- so props to them for digging and finding the perfect dress, and probably making Sabaji's year.

Kate Hudson in Valentino

Also, starting with Mary makes the CRASHING THUD of Kate's dress even more bruising. Kate's haircut is the only thing I'm remotely interested in here, and is ALL that gives this ANY edge. The rest is Valentino after crushing up some Valentine's Day hearts and snorting them. In Westworld.

Brie Larson in Gucci

I think this is GORGEOUS. It's identifiably Gucci -- it has elements that relate to its recent collections -- but without indulging any of the over-the-top stuff that has veered the brand into occasional nonsense.

Gina Rodriguez in Rasario

This would have been so intriguing without turning itself into a corset. Why undermine your own fabric like that?

Zoe Kazan in Miu Miu

She looks PERFECT in this. In terms of general excellence, it reminds me of this Miu Miu she wore to the Emmys, and is in fact a similar cut. They're cousins.

Maya Rudolph in Zac Posen

I did not think I liked this at first, but it's really grown on me and now I might love it? My issue is, I think, a) the SLIGHT see-through top, which has us staring at a lopsided-looking slip, and b) that the sleeves are a TAD much. So the whole affair might've been better strapless. But the fabric is lovely. I love Zac's taste in patterns.

Olivia Munn in Oscar de la Renta

Well, look, as actors go, she is the opposite of one of my favorites. But damned if she hasn't stepped up her red-carpet game here. That is gorgeous. And also technically maybe more an embellishment/metallic than a pattern, but it's the first post of the day so I get to break all our flimsy rules and be DRUNK ON POWER.

Vanessa Kirby in Valentino

I can't tell if this is a pretty enough dress, or a dress that's doing its best IMPERSONATION of a pretty-enough dress. The elements are there but it doesn't hang together, and it's kind of wearing her even though she did her lips up strong to counteract all that.

Mandatory Credit: Photo by John Salangsang/REX/Shutterstock (9327718gp) Vanessa Kirby 24th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, USA - 21 Jan 2018

Can we also talk about how her hair often looks TERRIBLE on the red carpet? This doesn't even seem clean. It's gym hair to the max. Just steal one of your Margaret wigs, Vanessa.

Kelly Marie Tran in Mary Katrantzou

Here's the thing: This needs a hoik, and it has one of my least-favorite hem styles. But I adore the pattern, and Kelly Marie is buoyant and wonderful, so I'm giving it an Internet hug and a thumbs-up.

Laura Linney in J. Mendel

CAPE! I don't know that I think this is an attractive pattern, exactly, but she looks great in this and I appreciate the inherent drama in her cloak.

Betty Gabriel in Phuong My, with Bradley Whitford and Amy Landecker

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP/REX/Shutterstock (9328441bo) Betty Gabriel, Bradley Whitford, Amy Landecker. Betty Gabriel, from left, Bradley Whitford and Amy Landecker arrive at the 24th annual Screen Actors Guild Awards at the Shrine Auditorium & Expo Hall, in Los Angeles 24th Annual SAG Awards - Arrivals, Los Angeles, USA - 21 Jan 2018

The idea of that pattern is neat, but I think the cut is too schoolmarm-ish on her (yes, even with the keyhole). Also, I didn't have her without Bradley and Amy, so HEY GUYS! Nice lapels.

Odeya Rush in Dior

I realize that this appears to be putting her nipples in some danger, but... isn't it also tremendous? It's SO much more interesting than 95 percent of what Dior has been doing, especially all those godawful Joe Boxer dresses. I love the skirt and maybe it needed one ore two more lines up top for slightly safer coverage, but I'm just very optimistic about Dior suddenly.

Sally Hawkins in Dior

And she NEVER wears anything this funky. Important note: It is NOT pants, despite apparently wanting us to think it might be. I actually thought this was going to be a Naeem Khan (WHERE ARE YOU NAEEM), even though she always wears Dior, because it's so nifty. But no. Dior. It needs to make something that might not catch QUITE so severely between her legs, but otherwise it's so cheerfully geometric.

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Stewart Cook/WWD/REX/Shutterstock (9327715jg) Sally Hawkins 24th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, USA - 21 Jan 2018

This angle takes some of the emphasis off that fold. I was just so surprised to see her in something this bold. I think everyone was itching to spin the Pantone wheel.