Heidi Klum

This is like the funkiest Christmas wrap at the store, the one that goes on sale because no one else understands it but you. I wish it were knee length? Or, just a touch longer. OR long-sleeved. I have notes.

Sofia Vergara

Surely she and Heidi coordinated on some level, right?

Simon Cowell

Lord. Sure, Simon. Granted, at this point, if he started taking fashion lessons from Terry Crews, we'd all be concerned he'd hit his head. But he really needs some sartorial juice. It's bonks.

Howie Mandel

Howie manages it! He does a lot with a little.

Terry Crews

I regret to inform you that I do not have a photo of Terry jumping. I know. It feels apocalyptic. The fact that he is SO monochrome here that his buckle shoes even showcase matching socks... dude, you are showing attention to detail Simon Cowell could only DREAM of having.

Terry Crews

Terry never used to do the pre-show pap walks, but here he is. Maybe he's realizing that it's a boon. MAYBE HE LOVES BLOGGERS. He certainly looks good.

Heidi Klum

Sure! This is like... Comfortable Supermodel.

Howie Mandel

Oh, Howie. I shan't ask.

Heidi Klum & Co. Remain Committed to America, and Its Talent

The live shows begin.