Emma was about 17 in this photo, if that, and I'm only sharing it to prove that she is human.

In 2007

Around this time she'd done Superbad and Drive, a short-lived Nathan Fillion TV show that was her first major role (assuming you don't count her winning that Partridge Family reality show; one of my friends was a producer on that, and therefore I have decided she is responsible for Emma's success in life). And look! She is wearing creative shoes.

in 2008

Do not be alarmed: Emma was not in this movie. And she did not NAB even at this early point in her life.

I wonder if this was meant to be cinched, or that was a desperation play to give it some shape.

In 2008

She went VERY sophisticated for The House Bunny. Something about her makeup has been done so differently here that she looks like Mila Kunis to me.

Let us acknowledge that she, again, has awesome taste in statement shoes. 

In 2009

That necklace reminds me of ME on Christmas Day, when I put every ribbon I can around my neck or on my head.

In 2009

That dress is a shapeless satin mess -- she was still on the cusp of her career greatness; true styling wouldn't come until later, I don't think -- but those earrings are the children of the ones in Desperately Seeking Susan.

This picture just made me laugh, and reminded me how much we all thought she looked like Lindsay Lohan. Now, Lindsay Lohan would be THRILLED if anyone thought she looked like Emma Stone.

In 2010

Was this tailored ON her body? It's a gathered mess.

This is totally sultry and simple, and perfect for an MTV event.

I assume, given that this was an Anna Sui event, that Emma was shoehorned into this largely against her will.

In Pucci

This was the Easy A premiere, and she went in one half of a Dynasty costume.

She is just so freaking charismatic. I'm sorry to report that I don't understand why she turned a scarf into a butt sling, but that smile right there is basically why everyone fell in love with her forever.

AND THEN THIS HAPPENED. I believe she was shooting The Help around this time, and that explains the sudden blondeness and bangs. But nothing explains the outfit. Her shifting belt exposes just how shoddily the satin pillowcase was stapled to her sports-shapewear.

In Calvin Klein (2011)

AND THEN, LO, A BEAM OF PEACH LIGHT SHONE FROM THE HEAVENS. At the time -- her first Globes, nominated for Easy A -- I wasn't totally sure how I felt about this, partly because she was so artificially bronzed all of a sudden and it threw me off. But when you see this in the context of all that's come before it, you realize just what a beacon of elegance it was, and how thoroughly it announced her as a major fashion presence.

In Lanvin

She seemed to have a thing about belts sitting just above the seaming on her skirts. This was very unusual, and at the time I liked it; now I feel like she might as easily be running the formal square dancing at the county fair. But in a fun way. Like, people are lining up to get on that dance floor.

In Chanel

Don't sleep on the fact that she's got a small train behind her. Like Lagerfeldian peacock feathers. I like the shirt, but want another crack at this whole thing, I think. Most especially I wish she'd worn it with darker hair, for some reason.

This might be Louis Vuitton because she was at a store opening. I am not fan of it, but I will take that clutch, please and thank you.

"I lost a bet. I promise."

This whole look is ripped from a catalog of clothes that are WAY more self-confident than they should be. And it'll be for a company named after nature. Like... Sky River. Or Elation Falls.

In Lanvin

This was Emma's first Met Gala. It's very pretty -- like a black and white art photo -- and much nicer than Dakota Fanning's tulle behind it.

You know how you get an idea that you look a certain way, until you catch your own eye in a mirror, and it's like, "OH"? That's what I'm going to do. I've decided this is what I look like, and that will get me through my day in blissful delusion until, nightly, I am forced to confront reality.

In Bottega Veneta

I wish I liked the dress better.

Psst, Emma, they're water wings, not pelvic wings. Also your shoes might as well be waving a white flag of surrender.

In Tom Ford

The optical illusion of this photo is a hilarious treat. It looks like she is burying her arms in the world's largest pockets. (In fact her arms are just behind her back.)

In Chanel

She's making it work, but man, is that dingy.

In Roland Mouret

Distressingly shapeless. 

In D&G

Let's pause to drink in the four women in this movie, and then mentally add Jessica Chastain, and imagine what a privilege it must have been to show up to work every day.

In Luca Luca

I always refer to this as her Dalmatian dress. The label doesn't exist anymore, and with all the crazy swaddling up top, I can sort of see why.

I would like to go back in time and take her shoe shopping for this outfit.

In Jonathan Saunders

This type of dress suits her -- and it also reminds me a little of Skeeter, her character in The Help -- but I say no to the shoes. At least they are trying something, but... back to the drawing board, y'all. She appears briefly to have focused more on the clothes and less on the footwear.

In Lanvin

I don't mind this, but find it interesting that she chose vintage-y, brown, daytimey shoes with it. They do play off the belt tie, at least. Also, we're STILL in 2011, which started 17 slides ago. She had the awards circuit for Easy A, then Crazy Stupid Love, then The Help. She was Peak Busy.

In Carven

Cute enough. Why not.

This is SUPER dramatic. I actually really like it. There's something slightly retro about it, and I think it's the hair.

In Gucci

I would just like to point out that, however you felt about The Help, it is bonkers to me that it lost the PCA to Water For Elephants, which is a Reese/R.Pattz movie you likely forgot existed. I do like this outfit, though -- it's very cool, and different for her -- and also we're FINALLY in 2012 here, y'all. AT LAST.

In Jason Wu

One of my favorite dresses she's ever worn.

In Lanvin

This reminds me of the gold Lanvin she wore five slides ago. That belt is weird, but in a way that I appreciate. This whole thing is effective to me.

In McQueen

I ALSO like this. It's fun to get to play up her youth.

In Giambattista Valli

This echoed a red Balenciaga that Nicole Kidman had worn five years prior, but Emma's is slightly softer. My problem with it is, normally it's very hard to overshadow Emma Stone, but this dress is coming dangerously close.

In Chanel

She changed for the post-party. I would not have. And she was seemingly uncommitted enough not to tweak her makeup to fit the gown. I think even just some extra lipstick would've done it.

In Lanvin

This was appropriately playful for the Met. I remember that this dress ripped on the way to the afterparty, though. The back, down by her waist, totally split apart while Alber Elbaz just stared at it. I don't know if he helped fix it, or just let it go.

In Martin Grant

Ehhh. This is better than it should be, but I wish the bottom did something else.

In Rue de Mail

I ADORE THIS SO MUCH. The Ferragamo shoes don't hurt, but her dress is perfection, and Andrew's sweater also gives me cheer. They are perfect together in these.

The amount I loved the previous look may equal the amount of disappointment I felt in this one.

In Fendi

This dress makes her look faintly pregnant, which is a feat indeed. Something about the top is also reminiscent of Starship Enterprise uniforms.

In Elie Saab

Well, this is actually pretty darn good.

In Gucci

Whereas this is a bit scary, as if she's in command of a forest with VERY dark powers.

In Roksanda

Those shoes are again AMAZING but I think they belong with a different outfit. And one that looks a little less cheaply stitched.

In Andrew Gn

Indeed, I'd have put them with this, I think.

In Jason Wu

Or this.

In D&G

I love a tapestry, so that part of me has warmed up to this dress. The other part of me is eyerolling Part 1 so hard right now. (The less said about the shoes, the better.)

In Bottega Veneta

This is such a departure -- the hair is almost punky. Would this have been better as a sleek dress with no peplum?

Let us pause for levity, and also long enough to note that it's a shame these two met so early in their lives. It was unrealistic to think they'd end up together when she was only 23; how often does THAT happen. Maybe they'll figure it out in a few years.

In Chanel

At the time I wasn't sure about whether this flattered her, but now I'm rather fond of it. Who knew. I don't think seeing the tutu helps, though.

In Miu Miu

This was for the Miu Miu fashion show. The cardigan looks like she borrowed it because she was cold.

In Valentino

She brought out the same houndstooth heels again! I rejoice. She's totally adorable in this.

In Burberry

Hmm. Can we keep the skirt only?

In Lanvin

Welcome to 2013, at last! We begin with her burning off the dud Gangster Squad in an outfit that's much better than those movie's reviews and returns were.

In Stella McCartney

One thing I've realized in putting this together is that Emma loves a splash of yellow. This might be her first, though, and other than Blah City on her feet. it's cute. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day, eh, Stella?

In Gucci

Whereas this is hideous. You could lop off the elbow wings and it'd still just be a black bag attached to some chicken wire.

'The Croods' New York Premiere

No. Just no. This feels like a backup because her first four choices were stained.

THOSE SHOES. YES. She should've worn them with the previous outfit.

In Chloe

This works surprisingly well on her. 

In Dior

I don't hate THIS, either. Am I soft, or right?

In Valentino

YOU TWO.

This one is ALLLL about the shoes.

In Saint Laurent

And then we depart again to a suit, and it's just crazy enough to work.

In Versace

One of my very favorites.

In Lanvin

She has beeen very loyal to Lanvin over the years, or at least during this period, and I'm not sure it was always totally rewarded. This is okay...? It may have needed fiercer shoes rather than cutesy ones with ties.

In Erdem

I like hers better than his, for sure.

In Valentino

If this were Fashion Plates, I'd swipe away the bodice.

In Chanel

I both like this, and think she looks a LITTLE bit like the circus.

In Brock Collection

THIS COAT IS YES.

In Prada

Shrug. 

In Valentino

And then HUG.

In Valentino

That skirt is DIVINE. I wish the top fit.

In Thakoon

I was SO torn on this. Love the colors, don't love that it looks like she trotted out an old sports bra. And the braid does nothing to give this the final polish that it needed.

Another one where the top two-thirds simply doesn't fit. I also would raise the waist.

In Dolce & Gabbana

She looks pretty here. I keep forgetting she did this Woody Allen movie. These two as a couple is the Woody Allen-est thing ever, short of him casting HIMSELF in that role.

In Valentino

I don't usually like tulle, but when I do, it's forest green and it's on Emma Stone.

In Chloe

This may sound weird, but the gown's retro look really goes well with the font.

In Jason Wu

I feel like somehow this stymied her makeup team.

A thousand times yes.

In Lanvin

It's the turn of 2015 now, and this is wonderful.

In Lanvin

A LOT of people felt she got away with this. I was not one of them, but I am mellowing on it with time.

In Dior

I am not mellowing on this, though. It is not as bad as it should be, but neither do I want to see it anywhere ever again.

In Michael Kors

SO CUTE, and perfect for the nominees' luncheon.

In Monique Lhuillier

I don't mind this, either. RINGING PRAISE, I know.

In Elie Saab

Lots of people loved this, and I get it, but I was never personally wild about the greenish tint.

In Altuzarra

Eek, though.

In Oscar de la Renta

This thing blew up during the photocall -- as did her hair, during an especially windy Cannes. It IS pretty, though. So bouncy.

In Dior

T

In Pucci

It's not great, but I actually think the jacket enhances it by providing a cool factor that's otherwise missing.

In Ulyana Sergeenko

I wonder if Emma Stone will go to her gravewishing she had said no to this movie.

In Giambattista Valli

Divine.

In Paul Andrew

Double divine.

In Bottega Veneta

This is also good.

In Prada

I'm significantly less sold on the robo chastity belt, although I realize the theme this year was Manus x Machina, and in its way that makes sense.

I keep forgetting that she's playing Billie Jean King in a movie soon. I assume this was............... an homage to a tennis dress? Not the best idea.

In Roland Mouret

In this slide and the previous one, I feel like Emma has someone different doing her eyebrows. It's too harsh, I think. I'd also take away one of the stripes across her body.

And I'd REALLY get rid of the lace hourglass.

In Giambattista Valli

"Never mind that. Just BEHOLD HOW ADORABLE I AM NOW."

In Versace

I am usually such a sucker for metallics, but this one is eating her alive.

In Chanel

This is SO TWEE but she's working it beautifully.

In Rodarte

That bodice reminds me of Better Off Dead, when one of Lane's mother's food creations slides off his plate under its own power and leaves.

In Prada

I liked this better than a lot of people did, but even I cannot deny that the skirt looks like The Dreaded Vertical Blinds.

In Erdem

Hmm. I want the bodice to be a bit higher, and I'd clip off the bottom ruffle. Why does Erdem do that LITTLE bit too much?!?

In Michael Kors

YES. The makeup isn't perfect, but the dress is wonderful on her.

In Armani

Please leave your flotation aids in the lobby.

In Gucci

This, though, I like. It's loud and it's cheerful and it's what I need.

In Prada

Here, I still want to lose the bits that go below the waistband. Harnesses will never be hot (she said, knowing she will have to eat those words someday).

In Rochas

His relationship with Eva Mendes complicates the 'shipping of Stoneling. Maybe we can agree that Eva will, with the full support of her children and Ryan, decide that she will only be truly happy if she colonizes the moon along with Stephen Colbert's wife. That way, because everyone is in agreement that this is the best and most satisfying and fulfilling course of action, there will be no broken hearts to stand in the way of Emma/Ryan and Jessica marrying Stephen.

In Roland Mouret

I think this is an intriguing way to work a style that could be really unflattering. And the lipstick is majestic. This one got me really ready for awards season, and I can't wait to see what she pulls from the many, many, MANY racks that I'm sure bear her name.

Emma Stone: The (Really Really Thorough) Fugtrospective

It's pretty much everything she's ever worn.