Jennifer Morrison
WHAT IS GOING ON HERE. It's panties, a drape, and a cage, which are the three props of a really unimaginative magician. It's like the worst pubescent boy ever -- it thinks it's being clever, but really, it's just chortling, "Heh, BOOBS, and stuff." Oh my God, it's Beavis and Butthead.
But hey, at least it's not pants. Why do I say that?
Alyssa Milano
BECAUSE THIS IS PANTS.
I think every inch of fabric on her body was purchased at a whites sale for table linens.
Madonna
Lady, we accepted it when it was punk-themed at the Met Ball. DON'T PUSH IT. You have spent your whole LIFE pushing it, and we appreciate that for the trailblazing behavior that it was, but TAKE A BREAK. Aren't you tired? Leave the pushing it to Salt n/or Pepa for a while.
Carly Rae Jepsen
Sweet lord. SIT DOWN, Klumy Rae Jepsen.
Ke$ha
"Well," you might be thinking, "This seems perfectly acceptable, if overly ruffled. Ke$ha has been way more naked and dumb than this."
Ke$ha
GOTCHA.
Emmy Rossum
This doesn't even look terrible, but dude, pretty soon The Widow Longoria is going to notice that you stole this.
Ariana Grande
Blah blah blah see-through boning NEXT.
Nayer
I'm told by Wikipedia that she is an American recording artist, and not, in fact, Ice-T and Coco's favorite dog walker.
Stana Katic
This is not naked, but it might be dumb? I just can't deal with how costumey it is, AND I think it goes too far and ends up not doing her body the favors it was supposed to do. Just... a lot. Turn it down, Stana.
Kimberly Perry
Poor Kimberly Perry forgot to defrost her torso.
Jenny McCarthy
Oh, whatever. Of course.
Hayden Panettiere
Wait a minute, Hayden. You look nice. Did your spam filter hijack the memo?