Irina Shayk in Versace
This is basically the extravagantly tacky version of Amy Adams' Oscar gown. It's especially hilarrible to me that you can see her boob -- or its padding, or whatever that is -- dipping down below the sheer panels on her torso. It's just so bad. SUCH a waste of emerald green.
Nina Agdal
This is the worst thing I have seen since the time I microwaved a Lean Cuisine pizza and then apparently forgot about it and then the microwave/wall oven unit broke and so it sat in there desiccating -- unbeknownst to me -- until the repairman came and opened it and was like, "Uh... your lunch?"
Shanina Shaik
There is legitimately no room for error in fitting any of these. And yet, the first mistake was fitting ANY of them, at all, on any human ever.
Hailey Baldwin
I usually ignore Hailey Baldwin (daughter of Steven) because I haven't decided if she's a model or a "model." But, she's sheering it up in this moldering old bridal misfire, so into the parade she goes.
Olga Sorokina
Olga is a designer. I wouldn't trust her if she were the last pizza delivery person on Earth.
Selita Ebanks
The dress could've been all right without the bodice that's showing me all her no-bra magic tricks. But let's face it: We're all looking at the person with her, and the fact that the world is his Orient Express First Class Sleeper Car.
Lindsay Wixson, Gabriela Cadena, Josephine Skriver
The lady in the middle, Gabriela, is a designer. Presumably THE designer. Of at least her own piece, if not the ones around it. She should maybe never admit that to anyone.
Paris Hilton
We now live in a world where PARIS HILTON is more tastefully clad than many attendees who collect actual paychecks. How does that make you feel? I'm sure it makes 2005 feel alive with renewed purpose.
Karlie Kloss in Tom Ford
This is not sheer. But sometimes it feels like it might as well be. I do actually think she looks totally bombshell in it, though -- snorey shoes aside -- and it's showing up the "sexy" transparent ensembles for the Emperor's New Clothes that they are.