Messi the Dog

Okay, I know Messi isn't wearing a gown but of course I'm going to open with this very VERY good boy! (He got to, as far as I can tell, go down the red carpet first before it got too intense or scary.)

Messi the Dog

Is that a microphone? If I were a big celeb, I'd ONLY grant exclusives to Messi.

Laura Martin Contini and Messi the Dog

WHAT A GOOD BOY. (She looks nice also!)

Jane Fonda in Elie Saab PF19

HELLO! What a babe. This is perfect.

Jane Fonda in Elie Saab PF19

Also dreamy without the coat!

Manuel Guillot, Raphaël Quenard, Léa Seydoux, Louis Garrel, Vincent Lindon and Director Quentin Dupieux

Apologies for downloading a photo where everyone looks...lightly confused about the camera they're meant to be directing their Blue Steel toward.

Léa Seydoux in custom Louis Vuitton

A LOT of people online seemed to think this looks a bit cheap, which is SURELY IS NOT. I'm interested to hear your thoughts.

Heidi Klum in Saiid Kobeisy

She looks GREAT.

Frederique Bel

That glorious feathered coat is PERFECT for Cannes.

Farhana Bodi

Hot take: The train is distracting from how good the dress is.

Tatiana Korsakova

This is very pretty! (There was more velvet at this event than I would have guessed for May.)

Guan Xiaotong

This is DREAMY.

Alicia Aylies

I fear this is much too sheer, but let's pretend it's not: This is fun!

Rose Bertram

This is lovely, although you know she saw Heidi Klum and was like, "DAMMIT."

Shanina Shaik in Zuhair Murad

Gorgeous. Cannes is really Zuhair Murad's time to shine.

Miles Moretti

I really like this.

Lady Victoria Hervey

On the other hand, this has a Chintzy Star Wars Knock-Off Vibe.

Blanca Blanco

This reminds me of a bedskirt I really wanted as a child.

Hofit Golan

Has she always looked so much like Heather from Selling Sunset>

Virginie Ledoyen

Someone haul out the REASONABLE!!! klaxon.

Helena Christensen

This is ALSO dreamy, like a stepped up Jane Austen vibe, and I'm here for more of that.

Elena Lenina

Understated!!!

Zhao Tao in Christian Dior

Over at Check the Tag, someone noted that they didn't like the black "tube top" here, and it's true this dress was shown without it. I would argue for it being properly lined, I think.

Kylie Verzosa

Nothing says CANNES like wondering if you're looking at someone's purse, or their very ombre hair, before realizing that's the OTT outfit of someone behind them.

Mouna Ayoub in Schiaparelli

I really like this; it was originally shown with a MUCH higher High Side and I agree that looked better, but I think it was probably hugely impractical in real life.

Taylor Hill

This needs a tiny hoik but that necklace! HELLO.

Émilie Dequenne

I hope the hand we cannot see has a HUGE cocktail ring.

Emmanuelle Béart

LOVE. Five stars.

Daphne Bürki

I don't even really mind the sheerish-ness of the trousers but I DO think this needed black shoes.

Vicky Krieps, Asmae El Moudir, Xavier Dolan and Maïmouna Doucouré

There is A LOT going on here. I think Asmae El Moudi takes this one.

Vicky Krieps

A closer look. This is highly eccentric.

Araya Hargate in Balmain

Fab -- and I say that as an Avowed Glove Hater.

Gong Li

This washes her out in photos, but the colors of her necklace and bag are PERFECT.

Baptiste Giabiconi

How dashing!

Zoe Wittock

I must confess....I love. Yes, it's wallpaper. That's OKAY.

Paola Turani in Rahul Mishra

Oh, no, she's still rendering!

Daria Yanina

This is lightly delightful. It's a bit Low Level Van Herpen but more Van Herpen-y-ness in the world is always going to be fun.

Sasha Luss

A palate cleanser -- already!

Iris Mittenaere

Ooooh, I actually LOVE this?!

Jomana Al-Rashid

Martin, drag the REASONABLE klaxon back out! No, I'm sorry I told you to put it away. I was wrong!

Audrey Azoulay

You know what? I enjoy this.

Giancarlo Esposito

EXCUSE ME. Dashing! (If we have a REASONABLE klaxon, perhaps I should invest in a DASHING gong.)

Behold! The Rest of the Cannes Opening Ceremony

To the tune of Shots: GOWNS GOWNS GOWNS GOWNS GOWNS