
Never let it be said that Cardi B is a wallflower. This is hilarious. She looks like the widow of whomever throws that party in Eyes Wide Shut, here to preside over the anonymized grief orgy that she knows is what her late spouse would truly want. There will be no passed apps; only whatever crudités are served atop the bodies of naked cater-waiters. You might want to eat before you arrive.

I assume there are eyeholes somewhere in here. Do you think this was also created from a cast of her face? It kind of looks like it, right? It's extremely unsettling. (If I were her, I would rig it so that it could hover next to the bed and scare the ever-living shit out of Offset when he wakes up. Just to remind him who's boss.) I would love it if we were to find out this isn't Cardi B at all, and that she decided to send out a body double while she stayed inside to prepare for the hosting gig.

She DOES have some peripheral vision, at least. In addition to her sightless ear eyeballs and their fingers. I suppose if you're going to go there with Schiaparelli, then GO THERE.

Here is Cardi from a day or two earlier, at a photo shoot for the unrolling of the red carpet, or somesuch; she looks great. Cardi B is one of the few people for whom this outfit would legitimately be the smart-casual alternative.
