1968
Sonny and Cher attended this year because they were nominated for their original song "We Made 50 Eggs From Our Love," from Cool Hand Luke. ... I'm kidding, obviously; it didn't get nominated. ... Yes, still kidding. But if you want to play the What Color Is Cher Wearing game, I can promise an answer on the next slide.
Did you place your wager on pink? Sonny, meanwhile, absolutely is dressed as festive funeral Umbros.
1973
Here, they were attending to support their nominated song from the Godfather, "I Got You, NEEEIGH." (Okay: They were in fact presenting that category. We can see Cher's impressive abs, yes, but we can also see her pelvis. As would become her favorite custom here.)
1974
Cher her was promoting her nominated song from The Exorcist, "I Confess (I'm Cross With You)." (Or, she was presenting Best Score with Henri Mancini.) When you see her here dressed like this is a tiki beach party, it becomes less surprising that she blew it out later with the Bob Mackie stuff.
Another angle, should you desire. She is working some perilous underboob.
1983
In 1983, Cher attended to support her nominated song "I Got U Boat" from Das Boot. Her dress had some subtle sheers, but that was not the most thrilling turn of events in this slideshow. No, that would have to be...
1983
... that she dated VAL KILMER. For a good while, too. WELL DONE, BOTH OF YOU. I am not ENTIRELY sure how it came to pass, as he hadn't even done the underrated gem "Top Secret" yet and that is his first movie -- although around this time he HAD published a book of poetry (!) that he wrote about Michelle Pfeiffer (!!) whom he dated (!!!) after they met while filming an afterschool special (!!!!). I am extremely pleased for them both that they got to experience each other at this level of hotness.
1984
I believe this was the next year, when Cher was celebrating her Best Song nod for "Global Thermonuclear Love" from WarGames. (Or, nominated for Best Supporting Actress for Silkwood.) She and Val brought her son Elijah Blue. Apparently she and Val petered out amicably and are still close; she let him live with her when he was being treated for throat cancer, for example, and... well, read it all.
1986
AND THEN. Cher roared back to the Oscars two years later in support of her nominated song from Witness, "If I Could Churn Back Time." (Or, presented Best Supporting Actor to Don Ameche, for Cocoon.) This outfit is epic and perilous and camp extraordinaire. I understand why Cher wouldn't come to a Met Gala, especially a Camp-themed one -- if you are Cher, CAN you be camp, when that is truly you? -- but I'm sort of shocked no one tried to borrow this. MAYBE THEY DID.
1986
I love Don Ameche standing there, so impassive, completely unfazed by the enormity of this fashion moment. Never let it be said that Cher allows one to pass her by.
1987
And THEN, when she took home the statuette, she somehow topped herself. Zuhair Murad surely had this on a mood board at his home for his entire life. Honestly, my only regret is that she went so tame with her head-suit. It feels like she could have leaned ever so slightly further into this, which is not something one usually says of Cher and CERTAINLY not a thought I expected to have upon revisiting this piece of tulle. She is, I suspect, putting the "moon" in "Moonstruck."
It's somehow even funnier when you see her all wrapped up in her stole, as if that made much difference when her pubis was out.
1989
In 1989, Cher was there in support of her nominated song, "Just Like Wanda Gershwitz," from A Fish Called Wanda. (Or, she presented Best Picture.) I believe she is wearing a lampshade.
1998
Here, Cher is attending in support of her nominated song "I Drowned Someone," from Titanic. (Or... I have no idea at all why she was present, other than that she had recently made this hat out of a chair and wanted to share.)
This is a rare Cher afterparty pic, and there is something absolutely amazing to me about her attending the ceremony as some kind of sexy DirecTV competitor and then changing into bad pants and a cardigan.
2000
I love Cher standing there in all her magnificence, a cross gently thwacking her in the genitals, while Phil Collins celebrates his Oscar win for Tarzan. (You might also recognize this as her headshot for the Fug Madness bracket.) She was, of course, happy for Phil, even though it meant a loss for her original song, "[REDACTED]" from The Sixth Sense, which was disqualified due to spoilers.
2000
And, MORE PANTS.