1910
"Of COURSE I bloody dropped one," Betty fumed. "But I'm pretty sure that one is Bart's flask, and I don't see him here HELPING me with any of this, so perhaps I'll just... walk on by."
1911
"So the idea is, she's opening her presents, but she's all in silhouette. She's an empty figure, consumed by commercialism that is darkening all of our cores as the rot creeps in and takes over." "Sounds great but keep the gifts in color because we still want people to buy things." "Oh, yeah, obviously, for sure."
1911
There's a mark on this cover that makes it look like it says "CHRISTMA'S." I assume "Christma" is what all Jesus's friends called Mary, and I AM very curious what her perennial interests are.
1912
When she rubbed the lamp, Matilda fervently wished to be swallowed up by Christmas spirit. But it backfired spectacularly when the lamp burst into flames before she could wish for life-saving hedge clippers.
1913
Merle's idea of hiking clothes never failed to amuse her country relatives.
1913
"What's in the box? WHAT'S IN THE BOOOOOX??"
1914
Was climbing into the tree real, or a glorious hallucination? She wasn't sure, but she DID wake up with pine needles in an unspeakable crevice.
1914
She would never drop a present again. EVER.
1915
"How the f*ck am I going to wrap a box of flowers?"
1915
"All these suckers paying for a full size tree! For a third of the price you can just put a shrub on a table."
1916
"Don't worry, I'm SURE I'm invited."
1916
Merle's biggest power move was refusing to change her hiking attire, and instead simply changing the hiking... to cross-country skiing.
1917
It would be an UNUSUAL threesome, to be sure, but Charlotte wasn't about to look the gift jesters in the mouth.
1917
Santa tracking, before the Internet.
1918
This is a lovely and celebratory tribute to the end of WWI.
1918
"It's been a lovely year, but I've simply GOT to stop having threesomes with jesters," Charlotte decided. "I always wake up in the WORST shoes."
1919
Space is a LONG way to go to recover your lost purse, but then again, the DMV is a beast, so.
1919
Ah, dessert in a sack. So festive.
1920
She had assumed her jet pack would involve rocket fuel, not a magical man named Jet, but Marcy wasn't complaining.
1920
"Diane! DoorDash is here!"
1921
The down side to inflatable sleeves was having to hurl all her jewelry into its containers. On the plus side, her aim was getting quite good.
1921
"You can keep your crass Christmas baubles, Ed! It's pre-Valentine season now!"
1922
Meg had tried everything: cotton-candy hair, a dress that she made out of her mother's mourning bedsheets. It was no use. Granny STILL never saw her as anything but a yarn rack.
1922
"You're wearing TWO bathrobes? My, what a lovely trust fund you have."
1923
"Oooh, it even SMELLS expensive."
1923
Vivian wasn't prepared for Edward snapping the case shut on her fingers. The bloodletting was epic.
1924
"Darling, look, it's the world's tiniest present. I ASSUME it's for your mother."
1924
The Cult of Santa Worshippers had FINALLY hit its stride.
1925
"It's a LOVELY little ring, Fitz," she said. "PERFECT for passing along to my future third husband's youngest daughter."
1925
"DOES NOBODY HAVE A COAT CHECK ANYMORE???"
1926
I love this. I'm going to recreate it later with all my gifts, except that might get bloody because one of them is a set of spikes to attach to my shoes for going up and down the steep driveway in winter.
1926
Happy Holidays from the world's smallest wrapping table to you.
1927
This is so neat. Simple but striking. Also green. Maybe she ate some bad sushi.
1927
"Of COURSE I belted it to my stomach, Billy! YOU try skiing without this getting caught in someone else's poles!"
1928
I am not a particular fan of this artistic style, which popped up a fair bit during the 20s on Vogue.
1928
"Stick to your guns, Melba," she told herself. "Do this long enough and eventually EVERYONE will be belting their scarves."
1929
The Scales of Justice got a major seasonal makeover this year.
1929
Nothing says December like perching on top of a random periscope.
1930
"O HOLY TIC TAC TOE, BLESS US THIS CHRISTMAS SEASON."
1930
In fact, NOBODY started belting scarves on the ski slopes, so Melba tried to make them happen on desert jaunts instead.
1931
It's a bracelet, but it's also a PRINTER.
1931
"Darling! Air kisses only, please, I'm still skittish from the 1918 flu."
1932
"TAXIIIIIII!"
1933
"Oh, I'll get her a taxi, all right. A TAXI TO HELL."
1933
"Belted scarves," snorted Gillian. "SHE'LL never show her face in Klosters again."
1934
"Getting trapped in foliage isn't JUST for royalty anymore."
1934
"How long do I let him tinker under there before I remind him that I'm a certified mechanic?"
1935
This manicure choice is very weird to me -- I get that it's meant to be A Look, but with some of the nails, that look is Chipped & F&cked. REALISTIC, per my own nails, which I painted and then ruined within the same day, but not super Vogue.
1935
"If you tell me ONE MORE TIME that it's too cold for the beach, I SWEAR TO GOD I will EAT YOUR KIDNEY."
1936
Well, that's great, if you actually ASKED for a pinecone.
1936
I like to imagine that they lost a shipping line as a sponsor, and so designed a cover that makes cruises look like monstrous toxic blights. I imagine this image hits a bit more prophetically for cruise lines after 2020, too.
19371201-1609099572
Do you think the castle was part of the present?
1937
This is a very nice photo, but it just reminds me how much I hated cross-country skiing. I couldn't get the technique right (although the teacher didn't seem that invested in actually TEACHING me this) and so basically it was like shuffling.
1938
The colors here are unusual, but damned if the whole thing doesn't pop.
1938
A Very Southern Hemisphere Christmas.
1939
"SCREW YOUR BEACHES, GIRLS! I'M SHREDDING SOME MOGULS."
1939
Beautiful. I love when they play around with spelling the masthead out of other things.
1940
"All of it. Wrap ALL of it up. Put it on my ex-husband's tab."
1940
Pre-war restraint?
1941
I hope one of the ideas for men is this incredibly inaccurate weathervane.
1941
"This year, I gave everyone HATE CANDLES."
1942
This is like the 1942 version of a sexy selfie she's going to regret sending to her boyfriend.
1942
Well, she looks warm, but that tulle scarf is only going to get more irritating.
1943
I don't really know what the creative suggestion was here -- it feels like SHE PERISHED BEAUTIFULLY AT CHRISTMAS -- but it's admittedly really visually great.
1943
"HAHAHA ALSO I'M NOT DEAD AT ALL, I FAKED IT SO THAT I COULD SPY ON MY SISTER AND MY HUSBAND AND THEY WILL REGRET CROSSING ME."
1944
Early Instagram Influencer behavior.
1944
This season, get caught in a tar storm. It's so fun!
1945
I want them to recreate this cover somehow for Pride.
1945
"Flowers over my flower is AWFULLY literal, Mother."