1946
It's two! Two! Two Vogues in one!
1946
"Oh, come ON, darling, the children just need to see someone in a red furry suit and your grandfather has been passed out since four. Just shove a pillow up your shirt and go."
1947
I'm not totally sure what's goin on here, but I keep seeing the Grinch's evil smile in here.
1948
"They didn't tell me the resort was in ANTARCTICA."
1949
I regret to inform us all that this New Year's Fashion did NOT -- as promised -- live in perpetuity.
1950
Unless that's supposed to say "potty clothes" and "potty decorations," I fail to see what this has to do with Vogue or the seasons or anything at all.
1951
The angle of her body in this close-up makes her look to me like a very fastidiously decorated thumb
1952
Starring Renee Zellweger as model Sunny Harnett.
1953
Whoever this is, she is not named on Wikipedia, unless her given name really was "Christmas Issue Pages To Keep And To Treasure." It's a super cool cover, though. I hope she DID keep and treasure it.
1954
Sarah Jessica Parker would be the one recreating this cover.
1955
I'd give this Mary Jane Russell one to SWINTON. But part of me would also like to give it to Anne Hathaway.
1956
MORE babies. Sheesh. Babies are cute, but Vogue is not a warm and cuddly family magazine. I assume this would be the cover we give to Reese Witherspoon, though, because it has a Hello Sunshine/Draper James vibe.
1957
That's WAY more suns than Tattooine has.
1958
And THIS is going to be a Hitchcock parody movie about the fashion industry -- or, not even a parody, so much as a loving homage. We shall cast Hathaway in this and hand the other one back to SWINTON. And we shall call it Snip.
1959
I misread that one cover line as "15 minute emergency coffins" and I've decided the cover model did, too. (Elisabeth Moss will win an Oscar for Fifteen-Minute Emergency Coffins by Wes Anderson.)
1960
Hilary Swank stars in the oddball Rear Window-meets-Pretty Woman indie film Beauty Unseen Before.
1961
And How To Succeed at Christmas Without Really Crying will star Caity Lotz of "Legends of Tomorrow" because she could totally replicate this cover.
1962
Jordana Brewster and Julia Butters star in a very special new Amy Sherman-Palladino series called The Small Joys, about Eliza and Nadine Joy, who are very very tiny but whose hair is very very not.
1963
Hand Rosamund Pike a Golden Globe nod for her starring turn in The Gilded Artichoke.
1964
This is obviously going to be Lady Gaga.
1965 - Wilhelmina Cooper
Morena Baccarin stars in Once Upon a Gala Basket, in which a woman finds herself at the center of a silent-auction prize.
1966 - Evelyn Kuhn
Margot Robbie will develop this project herself. Assuming we go with the "woman realizes she's being peeled off someone else's mood board," we could call it... Torn. Or don't give it a verbal name; just refer to it by making the sound of ripping paper. Very Stefon.
1967 - Jean Shrimpton
Annabelle Wallis strives to be taken seriously in the undersea adventure The Octonauts and the Sea Queen, and it won't work but at least she tried.
1968 - Lauren Hutton
Nobody really looks like Lauren Hutton, so it's hard to dupe this one. Let's cast Hunter Schafer from Euphoria in a movie adaptation of this cover and she can develop and write it.
1969 - Susanne Schöneborn
The only person I know who would try this haircut now is Miley, so let's cast her here in the nominal indie success, The Only Person I Know Who Would Try This Haircut.
1970 - Sophia Loren
One doesn't recast Sophia Loren.
1971 - Grace Kelly
Nor Princess Grace.
1972
Cher can just play herself, too, in Ooh-La-Lash.
1973 - Jacqueline Bissett
I need to know how this is a surprise holiday issue. SURELY no one said to themselves, "Holy smokes! I was POSITIVE 1972 was Vogue's final holiday issue!"
1974 - Lisa Taylor
Both Cher and Liz Taylor are name-checked on this cover, and I wish either of them had been in the photo.
1975 - Karen Graham
Let's see. How about we cast Lotte Verbeek (Geillis in Outlander) in a Starz rom-com called See, Do, Dare, Wear.
1976 - Lisa Cooper
That is an incredible list of things to enjoy. Palaces and daffodils and cats and "adornment"? Was it a very long, high night in the office?
1977 - Patti Hansen
This doesn't read JOY so much as SCHEMING.
1978 - Rosie Vela
Amanda Bynes is due for a comeback, and her turn in Hallmark's Christmas Upbeat -- as a drummer who finds there is no room in any bands until she bumps into one playing a barn on Christmas Eve -- will do it.
1979 - Kim Alexis
And I am VERY excited to cast Betty Gilpin as Kim Alexis in Truman Capote on Truman Capote, which will itself be written by Charlie Kaufman.