Flashback Fug: The 2009 Grammys

MIA

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Jim Smeal/BEI/REX/Shutterstock (846553w) M.I.A. 51st Annual Grammy Awards, Press Room, the Staples Center, Los Angeles, America - 08 Feb 2009

I hope this is the cover of her baby book.

MIA

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Picture Perfect/REX/Shutterstock (846522dr) M I A 51st Annual Grammy Awards, arrivals, the Staples Center, Los Angeles, America - 08 Feb 2009

She wore this on the red carpet, and should not have changed.

Taylor Swift

Such a dark dress, and such a springy Church hair and makeup situation. Taylor was very much still figuring it all out here.

Miley Cyrus

Speaking of working things out... whoever made this should not have quit on the actual good part when they got to the thigh region.

Adele

This was before Adele got all polished up and spit-shined.

Robyn

Those tights! The random holes, one of which might be revealing underboob! Robyn, I miss you.

Kate Beckinsale

I liked her eyebrows better in this era. Now they're really curved and they kind of changed her face a little. (Also, this dress is so The Widow Longoria.)

Paula Patton

Simpler times.

The Jonai

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Picture Perfect/REX/Shutterstock (846522cn) The Jonas Brothers 51st Annual Grammy Awards, arrivals, the Staples Center, Los Angeles, America - 08 Feb 2009

LOOK AT WHAT A FETUS NICK JONAS WAS.

Dwayne Johnson

Wow. This is a great BEFORE photo for Ilaria Urbinati to use, illustrating that she is very good at what she does.

Eric Benet

Jazzy, and would've looked a lot better with a white shirt. Also, I had totally forgotten Noted Sex Addict Eric Benet even existed.

Coldplay

You guys, seriously, ten years doesn't feel long enough ago for Chris Martin to look that baby-faced.

Paris Hilton

Was this a castoff from Jennifer Garner's 13 Going on 30 wardrobe?

Zooey Deschanel

Oh, sweetheart, that purple sling is NOT holding your dress up well. Or wait... maybe it is. Maybe it's ALL SHE HAS.

Solange Knowles

Well, 2009 Solange had flawless taste in purses, terrible taste in shoes, and way more staid taste in dresses.

Paula Abdul

It's so nice to see Paula keeping it really toned-down.

Carrie Underwood

She had won American Idol in 2005, and was a year away from marrying her hockey Mike. She was a few inches of lining away from this being better, but also did look a little Generic Country Blonde here.

Carrie Underwood

And OH MY GOD that is not her color. her styling has ALWAYS completely confounded me. I cannot figure out why Carrie freaking Underwood can't find someone to get it right for her. Maybe SHE should call Law Roach.

Leona Lewis

Kinda frumpy and definitely dismal on the color wheel.

LeAnn Rimes

She should've been famous enough to get a really major dress, right?

Sheryl Crow

Well the fabric had potential, if it had been cut differently.

Audrina Patridge

This all just reminded me that they're bringing The Hills back and so we're no longer going to be on a break from these people.

Katy Perry

Is she hunching that way STRATEGICALLY, because it stops the dress pinching her chest?

Katie Cassidy

Okay, first, I thought -- in the thumbnail -- that she was going to turn out to be Jessica Szohr. Second, she appears to have been inspired by Vanessa Hudgens. Third, her tan must be real because you can see the line on her chest.

Jennifer Hudson

Static cling is truly so nefarious.

Estelle

I guess in outer space, they haven't figured out design any better than half the people here

Kim Kardashian

Remember this face? By which I mean, this specific iteration of her face.

Bai Ling

MY PARTING GIFT TO YOU.