Jennifer Lopez

BUT FIRST, we're going to lead with J.Lo. This outfit is trying so hard, it's actually forming beads of sweat.

Lindsay Lohan

I remember these dresses being in stores. I'm almost shocked she didn't have it on over pants.

Lacey Chabert

And none for Gretchen Wieners. Goodbye. (Lacey Chabert is so cute, and WHY is she reinventing neckties?)

Amanda Bynes

Beige shoes were STILL ruining the day even in 2004! Some enemies are forever. (Also I don't think her separates look SUPER together, but Amanda has had a rough go and I can't see this photo and not feel a pang.)

Alexa Vega

And what are THESE shoes doing here? I do, however, recall many of us owning cargo capris from Old Navy.

Hilary Duff

These shoes, however, are adorable, even if the outfit is a weird hybrid of a pool cover-up and a $5 tank.

Alia Shawkat

I feel like the erstwhile Maeby would wear this today.

Farnsworth Bentley

There is not enough self-imposed umbrella limbo on red carpets today.

Nick Cannon

He is almost unchanged.

Ashley Olsen

EVERYTHING here is dropped: the pants, the bodice. But at least they aren't weird robes.

Mary Kate Olsen

She has taped that dress down in not QUITE the right spots.

Avril Lavigne

Yes, but WHICH AVRIL IS IT.

Raven Symone

This is, indeed, so Raven.

Emma Roberts

BABY EMMA.

Cameron Diaz and Ellen

I can't get this photo to load properly, so you're getting it sideways. Cameron's shirt, viewed this way, is no less a table runner from Pier 1.

Kirsten Dunst

This was not her best haircut OR her best outfit.

Kate Beckinsale and Len Wiseman

Where was THIS photo for my ultra-low-rise jeans slideshow?

Ben McKenzie

He had so much HAIR.

Jennifer Garner

JEN. Don't raise your arm if your pants only have a one-inch zipper.

Jennifer Love Hewitt

It just all brings me right back.

Hugh Jackman

WERE WE EVER SO YOUNG?

Hey, Look, At Least The Kids' Choice Awards in 2004 Chose Gretchen Wieners

And lots of other celebs, like La Lohan, La Duff, and Las Olsens.