Aubrey O'Day

She's either the most fashionable broad at the bingo parlor, or the one most likely to get frisked by the vice-principal to see where she's keeping the flask.

Katerina Graham

I think this is what jigsaw puzzles on the Starship Enterprise look like.

Victoria Justice

This Victoria Justice girl looks so much like Nina Dobrev (Vampire Diaries) that Us Weekly once ran a photo of her next to a story in which they interviewed Dobrev. Nina Dobrev should be concerned, because if she's not careful, people will start thinking SHE was the one dressed as a hostess at New York's hottest club, SMRF.

Dita Von Teese

... Sure, okay.

Eliza Dushku

I am not in love with zip-front skirts like this -- somehow zippers always look wonkier from the front than the back -- but I can't even really think about it because her pose is so distracting. It's like suddenly Eliza Dushku is taking red-carpet lessons from Paris Hilton.

Raven Symone

Sigh. I appreciate wanting to wear a simple little blue dress, and all, but I have notes. First, that is too much hair. Trim it back before someone tries to climb up it. And second, I realize I don't know her, but I just can't help thinking this ensemble is not So Raven. It's more So What Raven Wears When She's Standing In Her Closet, Calling Aubrey O'Day To Make Sure They Don't Accidentally Wear The Same Ruffles. I don't know. Maybe I'm wrong. And this is the part where I mention that she used to be roomies with Lindsay Lohan, and aren't we all happy THAT didn't turn out as badly as it could have...

Selena Gomez

Oh, Selena. If Violet Beauregard took her show on the road to Vegas, it would look like this, except with a lot more sudden and violent bloating.

This actually reminds me of that scene in Bridget Jones' Diary where Bridget shows up to her uncle's Tarts and Vicars party in full bunny gear, only to learn that the theme was scrapped and nobody told her. NOBODY else went this whole-hog, it seems. I mean, what if Raven Symone was the first person Selena saw when she arrived? She probably wanted to fold in on herself. As it was, I bet she texted The Bieb and was like, "God dammit, I look like a showgirl named Blueberry Pop Tart," to which he probably replied something like, "That's hot, yo, my mom makes a mean blueberry pop tart -- that woman knows her way around a toaster." And then NOBODY felt better.

Fug and Fab the Blue

Apparently, Perez Hilton's birthday party theme this year was called the Blue Ball, which... cue the dad from A Christmas Story, and we'll leave it at that. But it's always fun to see which people take themes to crazy extremes -- you'll recall Leona Lewis wore a mask last year to this same bash; this year it's Selena Gomez -- and which just come for the booze and trot out a regular old dress (ahem, Raven Symone). Fug Madness 2009 winner Aubrey O'Day is back in resplendent wacktacular form here, with her poofy skirt and neck sleeves and sparkly tube top that may or may not be velvet. Something about the way her necklace hangs there keeps giving me the optical illusion that her top is a bra that has shifted 90 degrees to the side, just like all the hideously uncomfortable and ineffective strapless bras I've ever owned. And let's not forget the piece of skirt lining that's sneaking up over the high waistline. It's like Limited Too Goes To The Prom In 1996, crowned with a Chico's throw. Oh, girl. You epitomize the idea that simply putting on clothes does not an outfit make; sometimes that just ends up with you wearing your Goodwill pile. [Photos: FlynetOnline.com]