> ## Content Index > Fetch the complete content index at: https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/llms.txt > Use this file to discover other available public pages before exploring further. # Fug the Show: Carrie Diaries, episodes 2-1 and 2-2 - URL: https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-carrie-diaries-episodes-2-1-and-2-2/ - Published: 2013-11-08T20:00:29.000Z - Updated: 2013-11-07T22:44:33.000Z - Author: Heather - Tags: #wp, #wp-gallery, #slideshow, #Import 2026-10-07 07:35 ## The Chess Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7575-1024x768.xml) Get a good look at Wig during this dream sequence/montaged opening, because the producers have decided to get rid of it. Oh, Wig. You worked so hard. I will miss your puff. Carrie also looks predictably modern, but since this particular shot is a dream, maybe we can write that off to the fact that she's some kind of soothsayer. ## The Cheater Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7576-1024x768.xml) Carrie is hallucinating that Sebastian and Maggie are still a couple, even though in real life they're barely speaking and all that happened was a kiss. I don't know what's going on with Austin Butler's hair this season, but I think a small village is taking refuge from the elements under there, and he practically has a duck bill in this shot. It's quackers. ZING. ## The Interview Diaries ![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2013/11/IMG_7580-1024x768.jpg) Rundown: Carrie is still working at "Interview" and living in Larissa's apartment. It's summer and Larissa is still in Japan. This is the most '80s outfit I think they've put her in -- you can't see it here, but it's a crop-top. I do feel a bit like I hit my head and woke up in the middle of "Pop (Goes My Heart)." If that happened, also, I wouldn't be mad. ## The Makeover Diaries ![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2013/11/IMG_7581-1024x768.jpg) And then they send Carrie to a salon, so that they can use AnnaSophia Robb's actual hair -- just lightly curled -- and send Wig back to the unemployment line. What's a fired Wig to do? I kind of wish they'd plonk it on a different extra in each episode. Spot The Wig would be a great game. ## The Loft Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7582-1024x768.xml) This is Larissa's place, and of course it's overdecorated, and OF COURSE there is a hammock in the living room. I'm fairly sure she uses it as a sex swing, but don't tell Carrie that, because she sits in it later. ## The Maggie Diaries ![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2013/11/IMG_7584-1024x768.jpg) While Carrie and Walt are hiding from Castlebury, CT, Maggie is working at the country club so she can pay for college. You can't see it, sadly, but those shorts are TINY. Please, show. In the '80s, those would have been knee-length Bermudas with pleats and cuffs. Mouse is not speaking to Maggie out of solidarity, and thinks Maggie is just there to flirt with boys, like that's some mortal sin. The whole point of this is so that later, Maggie can confide her college situation to Mouse, and how forgotten she feels, and Mouse can decide to forgive her and tackle Operation Get Maggie Into College On Financial Aid like it's a calculus test. ## The Donna Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7586-1024x768.xml) D-D-D-Donna and the Jens are hanging out by the pool looking totally amazingly neon and demanding cocktail umbrellas that match their ensembles. Donna La Donna is a delight. She also spots Sebastian and decides to make some mischief, or something, for no reason except that she stirs shit like a baker stirs batter. ## The Dadshaw Diaries ![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2013/11/IMG_7588-1024x768.jpg) This shirt has little bikes all over it -- again, so vintage-y and modernly retro that I can't imagine you would ever find it in 1985\. She looks like she's in a bowling league for Tour de France aficionados. ## The Biking Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7593-1024x768.xml) TWO bicycle shirts. I actually really like this one. This is what the Bowl de France team wears during its calisthenics drills. ## The Vixen Diaries ![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2013/11/IMG_7597-1024x768.jpg) Carrie is wearing divine open-toed white heels - and I don't even LIKE white shoes - with a clingy blue and silver dress, and looks very pretty, and again... well, you know the drill. The CW seems to think that the ACTUAL '80s are too high a barrier to entry for These Kids Today. Someone asked us about the trend of updating older books at our panel in Austin this past weekend, and my take is that I don't much care for it. If your book isn't connecting with today's kids, it's probably not because you namedrop Burt Reynolds instead of Jake Gyllenhaal (well, maybe that is not the right example). Books are about characters. It's not too much to ask of a kid that they read a book set in another decade, and learn about a time when things weren't exactly like they are now. Right? RIGHT. Then talk to me in 20 years when we're changing all the Internet references in SPOILED and MESSY to mind-computers. ## The Bacardi Breezer Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7598-1024x768.xml) Donna is coming out on the town with Carrie and Walt, and to cause trouble, she brings Sebastian and exactly what I used to drink when I was 15\. She's also wearing a hideous red lacy prom dress, because Donna is allowed to look insane, because she's the villain. Never change, Donna. Apparently she is also still telling everyone in Connecticut that she and Walt are having steamy hot sex, so I guess he's not out of the closet THERE yet. I hope the closet he's stuck in is at least Donna's, because the scenery in there is hilarious. ## The Stripey Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7604-1024x768.xml) Mouse loves July 4, so naturally, she wears this to the club. It's aggressively preppy, but also cute, in a very Tommy Hilfiger way. She's still with West Thomas West, and still CALLING him West, and he still thinks her academics-obsessed competitive crazy aura is super sexy. Which I love. Good grades aren't dumb, kids. Get some. ## The Extras Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7606-1024x768.xml) Seriously, the extras on this show are the real heroes. LOOK AT THAT HAIR on the guy in the brown coat. That guy doesn't know about Kid N Play yet, but when he learns, he will feel like a man lost at sea who's finally found a port. ## The Boyfriend Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7607-1024x768.xml) Oh, and Dadshaw meets this guy, who still seems to think it's Seattle in 1993. ## The Extras Diaries AGAIN ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7610-1024x768.xml) SEE? THEY ARE AMAZING. What is that woman WEARING in the center of the frame? Are those culottes? It might be a dress, but the way she's standing creates the illusion of culottes, and why isn't Mouse wearing culottes? Surely you can find them. Otherwise, my new band, The Illusion of Culottes, will be in trouble. Because we will not wear them ourselves but we'll need to pass out a few pairs as gifts during every show. ## The Samantha Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/tcd0201_0994-1024x576.xml) And here is Samantha Jones, bouncer at a local club who helps Carrie after her signature purse is stolen. My take on her is this: Lindsey Gort is great at it. She doesn't come off like she's copying Cattrall, or doing a weird caricature; she actually does seem like the younger, less fully formed version of SATC Samantha Jones -- the core is there, but the edges aren't sharpened. Her voice is similar but not mimicry, and her mannerisms are eerily evocative but not copies. It's cool. Also, of COURSE she's wearing a top that turns her nipples into tiger eyes. ## The Requiem For A Wig Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7616-1024x768.xml) "Oh, Wig. I never really got to say goodbye. You were faithful. You absorbed my head sweat. You only occasionally smelled like dust and chemicals. You never moved on camera. You hit your marks. You were there for me when I didn't feel like sitting in the hair chair for three hours. You lived a full, or at least full-bodied, life. We will meet again, my friend. I will bury you in the best hatbox I can find." ## The Flock of Seagulls Diaries ![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2013/11/IMG_7618-1024x768.jpg) This nonsense actually works for me -- it's exactly what an '80s dude who thinks he's James Dean would do to his hair. Fun fact: Later in life, Sebastian Kydd sued "Something About Mary" for stealing his hair mojo, and lost his fortune. He is now Bruce Jenner's plastic surgeon's caddy. ## The Eyeliner Diaries ![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2013/11/IMG_7619-1024x768.jpg) Dorrit is annoyed that Dadshaw likes her boyfriend, so she decides to go back to the rebellious makeup, which looks terrible on her. But it's Dorrit, so nobody REALLY cares. ## The Roommate Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7622-1024x768.xml) And while Carrie is lounging around having coffee in a bathing suit and a kimono, Samantha climbs back through the window and announces that she needs a place to crash. So it's going to be a threesome. Something tells me this may have been Samantha's FIRST threesome with a gay man and another woman, but probably wasn't her last. ## The Hideous Diaries ![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2013/11/IMG_7623-1024x768.jpg) And then we get back to the shot I fugged back when they were filming, which is also in the video clip posted after the jump. They both look like deranged time-traveler aliens, out of one of those shows where they THINK they know all about human customs but actually they were just reading Jackie Collins novels. Also, an extra crosses the scene in front of them carrying the "Carrie" purse that was stolen earlier, and Carrie doesn't notice, because she's stopped attaching her identity to it. It's sort of a silly touch, yet also a nice one. ## The Heatwave Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7626-1024x768.xml) Samantha, it turns out, has a habit of walking around naked. Does that add up? Grown-up Samantha strikes me as a silk robe and marabou slippers kind of lady, but I guess she's broke and a drifter in this, her made-up youth, so it's possible she'd be a nudist. ## The Lingerie Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7628-1024x768.xml) Carrie Diaries: Filling your bralet needs whenever Hart of Dixie lets down the side. ## The Bonding Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7629-1024x768.xml) Carrie is too scared to hurt Samantha's feelings, so she doesn't tell her that she has to move out. Even though they find out Larissa is returning in a week, which is a PERFECT excuse -- you just say, "The woman who's living here is coming back so we all have to leave." Then it never has to be about behavior. I don't know why nobody pointed this out to Carrie, but then again, she doesn't have a lot of well-adjusted people in her life right now, or else they'd be asking her why her hair is randomly really tightly curled again, when she made a big show out of getting it relaxed. DID WIG DIE IN VAIN. ## The Geek Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7635-1024x768.xml) For some reason, when I saw this, I thought they'd recast Sebastian's Dad with Anthony Michael Hall, because... I don't know why. It's not. I wish it WAS. That would be amazing. Anyway, Mr. Kydd buys Sebastian the James Dean car, promises to fix it up with him, backs out on that promise, then demands Sebastian re-sell it for a profit once he's tuned it up (which appears to have taken him five hours). Sebastian gets so angry about this that he deliberately abandons the car, while it's running, in New York in front of a very curious pack of ne'er-do-wells. He's very depressed about his Daddy Issues right now, okay? He shouldn't be driving when he could be brooding. ## The Bennett Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7639-1024x768.xml) Walt still has a crush on this guy, who CONVENIENTLY said he wasn't going to hook up with Walt while Walt was under eighteen. Oh, guess whose birthday it is? RIGHT. They're all going to an outdoor concert together, which Samantha gets them into because she once banged Howard Stern and now he's like her personal Ticket Oak. Carrie, also, is wearing her hair in a banana clip. I used to think those were so amazing. Now I am terrified that Cressida Bonas is going to try and bring those back, too. ## The Phone Sex Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7641-1024x768.xml) Mouse is at summer camp, or something, and West wanted to have phone sex. (While he was at school and she was with her roommate. TIMING, DUDE.) So she walks in on Samantha servicing a phone-sex client while doing her Jane Fonda tape, and decides she needs lessons. It does not go well. But there is a weird moment where Samantha takes a call from a client and asks him how he feels about "orientals." I assume the writers put that in because, back then, people did use that term synonymously with "Asians," but... really, there's no write-around? It was strange. And it's PHONE sex, so I don't know why it mattered that Mouse is Asian. The client wouldn't have known. Mouse has no accent. There is no Face Time. She could've just said "underage math genius," or lied and said Mouse was a 41-year old madam who's worked the trade her whole life. Really strange. ## The Quiche Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7643-1024x768.xml) Mouse is making a special birthday quiche for their picnic at the radio concert, and Carrie is wearing a shirt that, again, people today would probably love. Jessica loves horizontal stripes AND sequins AND navy. This quiche ends up poisoning all of them, so much of the episode involves Samantha tending to everyone -- she has a gut of steel -- while they vomit into whatever receptacle they can find: ice buckets, carrier bags, hipster hats. It's actually pretty funny, as vomit goes. Donna La Donna freaks out that she's too beautiful to die in a park and Samantha -- who is her cousin, it turns out -- slaps her out of it. ## The Billy Ocean Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7644-1024x768.xml) Dadshaw is still going strong with Deb. It's nice and all, but I wouldn't have included it if not for this amazing album cover. Billy Ocean demands to be celebrated. And yes, Dadshaw puts on this record while making out with Deb later, and yes, she stops kissing him because she can't get out of her dreams and into his pants until she gets the dirty dishes out of his sink and into the dishwasher, because dried-out crusty scum is her pet peeve. I feel that Billy Ocean would be mortally offended that his music wasn't able to cajole a lady out of her pet peeves and into some booty. ## The Music Fest Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7646-1024x768.xml) Welcome to this sold-out festival, which appears to have six other attendees. Carrie is wearing an outfit so ugly that no hayride in America would accept her on the bandwagon. ## The Birthday Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7648-1024x768.xml) Poor Walt. He wanted to make out with Bennett, and instead they all went mouth first into puke buckets. As usual, Donna La Donna looks cramazing. Chloe Bridges must love this job. ## American Authors ![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2013/11/IMG_7651-1024x768.jpg) This whole time, they go on and on about American Authors, the band they're dying to see. The problem with using concerts is that all the 80s bands they would want to use are not an option, and maybe legally they can't hire people to pretend they're that band? So instead of inventing one, they use a REAL band, from today, mention the name a zillion times, and then have them perform "In A Big Country" as if it's their own, and then neglect to '80s up their attire at all. I'm pretty sure the lead singer stole his clothes from that guy who works at the hardware store down my street. ## The Barfy Diaries ![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2013/11/IMG_7652-1024x768.jpg) Carrie sneaks out of the concert to go do an interview for a fancy writing program, which is a connection her Dad finessed for her. Naturally, she pukes all over the place. What gets me is: a) the woman actually made her DO the interview when she looks green and is sweating like a Kardashian in a camera-free world; and b) that Carrie feels that awful and then suddenly vomits without a contingency plan. If you feel nauseated, you ALWAYS find a receptacle. I keep one in my car. You never know when the flu will strike. Receptacles are a vital part of the human experience. ## The Friendship Diaries ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7659-1024x768.xml) No matter how old Samantha is here, I don't buy her wearing a "BOYS" tank top. That woman called them "men" from her first period. She does have a nice conversation with Carrie, though, that inspires her to tell Sebastian how she really feels -- namely, that he broke her heart, and she hates herself for still loving him, and that he can't cry on her shoulder from his daddy issues anymore because he forfeited that right, and also, that he should cool it with the gel before someone tries to fondle his hair and breaks a finger (well, those last parts were implied). ## The Kissy Diaries ![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2013/11/IMG_7661-1024x768.jpg) Bennett and Walt agree to give it a go, no commitments, and Walt finally gets his first kiss. It seems to go well. I like these two, but I also think they look a bit too similar, to where it's like watching a person make out with himself -- like Walt is practicing with a mirror, or something. Still, I love Walt and want him to be happy. Oh, and by the way, YES, Bennett did mention his roommate Stanford Blatch in the finale of last season. This season, they explain his absence by claiming he ran off to London, so either they aren't prepared to deliver on Young Stanford or they're saving him for when they really need it. [Fug the Show: Carrie Diaries, episodes 2-1 and 2-2I forgot this show had returned. I didn't forget about the show, and it's still nice and light and relaxing, but with Halloween and the fact that it changed nights, I only just realized that I'd missed TWO EPISODES. So let's catch up with the clothes and the Samantha Jonesing -- speaking of which, after the jump, I embedded a clip of Lindsey Gort walking in that jumpsuit we all hated so much. Because I think it's even worse in motion. This is just a tiny piece of the episode, so don't worry: Oh, Samantha. The regrets you someday will have. \[Video: Hulu\]![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/img_7575-1024x768.xml)](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-carrie-diaries-episodes-2-1-and-2-2-11-2013/)