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# Fug the Show: Downton Abbey recap, season 4, episode 6
- URL: https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-downton-abbey-season-4-episode-5/
- Published: 2014-02-04T17:00:11.000Z
- Updated: 2014-02-17T03:27:45.000Z
- Author: Jessica  
- Tags: #wp, #wp-gallery, #slideshow, #Import 2026-10-07 07:37

## Downton Breakfast in Bed

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5166.xml)

You'll be happy to hear that Anna has moved back into the cottage and is reporting that things are "getting better" WRT her relationship with Bates, although Mary still doesn't know any actual facts. I mostly just want to talk about how fabulously neat Lady Mary's bed is. She must sleep motionless on her back like a corpse.

## Downton Breakfast

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5169.xml)

Down at breakfast, Lord G has a letter from Cora's uncle (brother? Something), who is in some kind of serious financial/legal trouble. "I always think him rather good at business, if nothing else," Lord G muses, and everyone else manages not to ask, "HOW WOULD YOU EVEN KNOW?" Additionally: Downton has decided to get some pigs, and Lord Grantham uses the word "skedaddle," which makes me forgive him for several of his transgressions.

## Downton Brooding

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5172.xml)

Bates, as much as I love him, has gone ahead and made Anna getting raped all about him. He's being very kind to Anna, of course, but he's also standing in the corner staring at nothing (plotting his next murder) and telling her things like, "IT'S NOT YOU IT'S ME." Um, it IS her -- or, more accurately, a terrible thing that happened TO HER. Stop making this all about YOU, Bates. Don't you have a morning jacket to brush somewhere?

## Downton Rose

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5174.xml)

Rose actually really does pull off these flapper fashions nicely. Anyway, she's planning a surprise for Lord Grantham and said surprise is that she's brought her lover, the American Bandleader Jack Ross to Downton to perform for him. (Cora doesn't know this yet; no one knows it until Jack Ross shows up in a dapper suit and is charming to a gobsmacked Carson.) (Also: I don't think they're actually LOVERS, but they're certainly SNOGGERS.) Baxter overhears only the juiciest part of their convo -- "Mrs Hughes is the one for a secret" (um, no kidding) and "This shall affect all the servants!" (because they will briefly be in on the surprise) -- and reluctantly reports back to Thomas, who makes a HUGE leap in logic after Mrs Hughes passive-aggressively f's with his mind on the subject of Whatever Secret She Knows, and he decides everyone is being laid off. A) I think Baxter is a good egg, and will eventually wriggle out of the irritatingly vague blackmail situation she's embroiled in with EvilButler.com, and (b) Thomas, get your head straight. Do you really think ROSE would be consulted if a bunch of servants were getting fired?!? You're smarter than that.

## Downton Dowager

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5177.xml)

Isobel and Violet are hilarious this week; Maggie Smith and Penelope Wilton must have the best time working together. Their scenes are a delight. Anyway! Remember how the DC suspects Young Pegg (I have been informed that, in the opposite situation of Ray Pruit, his mama actually COULD afford two consonants at the end of his surname) stole her precious letter opener, which was a gift from the King of Sweden? Well, now a priceless little ivory knick-knack has gone missing and she is SURE he's taken it and HE IS SACKED.

## Downton Animal Husbandry

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5178.xml)

In which Tom assures Mary he won't move to America until "the pig business is up and running." Lady M looks uncharacteristically bland in this oatmeal color, but maybe she feels it's inappropriate to look overly gleeful in a place that will eventually house pigs. Remember that time Mary was going to go to America to meet a cowboy to escape from the potential scandal of WhatsHisName revealing to all and sundry that her vagina was a killing machine (although in fairness it had claimed but one victim at that point), until Matthew was deliciously reasonable and told he totally didn't care? Maybe they should ALL pop over and pay us a visit.

## Downton Isobel

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5183.xml)

So, Isobel is hilariously INCENSED that The DC has fired Young Pegg. And she will get to the bottom of it! "I'm very grateful, your ladyship," he says. "I'm not 'your lady-' OH NEVER MIND," she says, and nearly shoves him out the door in her haste to run over to see the Dowager Countess and give her a piece of her mind.

## Downton Secrets

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5185.xml)

Mrs Hughes must be VERY relieved that Rose is only asking her to hide a six-person jazz band for a couple of hours, and NOT popping into her study to tell her some truly horrifying tale of psycho-sexual torment that she then asks her to take to her grave. I mean, the fact that she's snogging Jack Ross is a bit of a scandal -- he's black! he's American! He's a *bandleader*! -- but it's a properly juicy and fun one.

## Downton Isobel

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5188.xml)

This scene was just...all of the scenes with these two delight me. Anyway, Isobel puts on her smartest hat and trundles over to grapple with Lady G, and their sparring is divine. The DC is quite sure Young Pegg is a thief and Isobel is at her very sanctimonious best, all, "YOU PUT TOO MUCH IMPORTANCE ON MATERIAL ITEMS AND NOT ENOUGH...ON JUSTICE!" And Violet sniffs, "I wonder you don't just set fire to the Abbey and dance around it, [painted with woad and howling](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isatis%5Ftinctoria?ref=go-fug-yourself.ghost.io)," and Isobel says SHE MIGHT IF IT WOULD HELP and then of course, The DC's butler, Spratt (who always looks close to tears, hilariously, and who I love) pops in to note that, whoops, they've found the priceless ivory knickknack after all!

## Downton Awesome

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5190.xml)

Isobel wonders if the DC will apologize for firing Young Pegg, and Violet points out that although Young Pegg didn't nick this particular knack, will NO ONE REMEMBER THE FATE OF THE LETTER OPENER OF THE KING OF SWEDEN?

"How you hate to be wrong," Isobel observes. "I wouldn't know," the Dowager Countess replies. "I'm not familiar with the sensation." MIC DROP.

## Downton Drama

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5191.xml)

So, no one can find Michael Gregson. He has, per Edith, "vanished into thin air." And she's VERY upset and Cora is, honestly, perfectly sympathetic but a little glib. She really thinks Gregson is going to turn up, but NO ONE has heard from him or can reach him, and I frankly would be a little more concerned about it by this point if I were Cora. Not because I would be worried he was dead, exactly, but I WOULD be worried that my daughter WHO WAS LEFT AT THE ALTAR ONCE ALREADY, was possibly getting the Fade-Out again, and considering her attachment to Gregson AND her emotional issues over all, would not handle that well.

## Downton YAY!

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5194.xml)

So, someone in the Infamous Ritz Cookery Course has dropped out, and they want Alfred to take his place, immediately. Several things: (a) Jimmy is a total ass in this scene to Alfred and honestly I rather hate Jimmy and want to push him down the Downton Well, where I've pushed so many before. (b) I enjoyed very much our dramatic theory in last week's comments about how we decided Alfred is SECRETLY ILLITERATE, but he is in fact totally literate, and (c) please God let this Daisy/Alfred storyline be OVER. I actually quite like Alfred and wants the best for him but zzzz. Also! Isn't Daisy supposed to be off helping WhatsHisName's father with his freaking farm? Instead, she cries all over everything and totally blames IVY for "driving Alfred away," because she didn't love him. DAISY, you thoughtless bowl of clotted cream, if she HAD loved him, then you'd have to watch them CANOODLE ALL THE TIME and that would be worse. Ugh, Daisy.

## Downton Dinner

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5196.xml)

Time for a round of How Did Everyone Dress For Dinner? The answer is: everyone looks lovely.

## Downton Poor Edith

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5197.xml)

Except Edith, who looks rather green in this gown, which makes perfect sense for this scene given that she probably FEELS green.

## Downton Tunics

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5198.xml)

And everyone is very touched as Alfred gives a little speech about how wonderful Carson has been to him.

## Downton Sadness

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5203.xml)

These two have decided to have a date night to try to get over All The Trauma Of Recent Days and basically the entire conversation is Bates telling Anna he loves her, and Anna crying that their whole life sucks now, and then Bates is basically like, "it totally does. Make reservations."

## Downton Windowseat

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5204.xml)

I love these more casual early 20s sailor-y tops. I kind of want one to wear with jeans. Anyway, it is in this scene that the show once again makes the point that Baxter is really nice and good at her job, and we are to be on her team when Thomas cranks up his Vague and Probably Evil Machinations anew. Baxter DOES try to get more scoop about the "Big Changes" Thomas has decided are coming and Cora is seriously like, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

## Downton Farewells

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5205.xml)

Alfred leaves, with a vaguely passive-aggressive comment to Ivy about how he doesn't ALWAYS get what he wants, and then a very nice speech to Daisy where he basically tells her that she's great but he was never going to want to tap that, so she really needs to accept it, and MY GOD JUST LISTEN TO HIM, DAISY. She does give him a kind and good-hearted farewell, so hopefully that chapter is closed.

Thomas's parting words: "Don't do anything I wouldn't do," and Mrs Patmore is all, "that gives you a bit of leeway." I hope Alfred turns into a dashing, cocky ladies' man, man's man, and man about town once he gets to London.

## Downton Shenanigans

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5210.xml)

Isobel is my favorite. She comes over to the DC's house when she knows she's out, then pretends to be faint on the doorstep so that Spratt will let her into the drawing room to recover, at which point she snoops around and finally finds The Precious Letter Opener Bequeathed By The King of Sweden stuck between two chair cushions.

## Downton Eyeroll

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5212.xml)

And then the best thing ever happens, as you can see in this screengrab. That is a full-body eyeroll from the good Dr. Clarkson, prompted by the fact that Isobel has dragged him over to yell at the DC having fired Young Pegg FOR NO REASON and Violet lets her rant and rave before....bringing Young Pegg into the drawing room, as she'd rehired him immediately.

## Downton Smug

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5217.xml)

This is the picture they will show young actors when teaching "the cat that ate the canary." Isobel is obviously flummoxed. "I'd say that was game, set, and match to Lady Grantham," Dr Clarkson says, moving the likelihood that Isobel will shag him from 55% to about 35%.

## Downton Open Table Snafu

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5225.xml)

So, at the posh hotel where Bates and Anna hoped to drown their sorrows, the snooty maitre d' pretends to have lost their reservation -- due to their lack of poshness, presumably -- until Cora (there for some charity meeting) swans up and is DELIGHTFUL to them and basically rescues their entire night and is just wonderful in every way, and is also wearing a lovely necklace that I covet.

## Downton POOR EDITH

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5229.xml)

OH EDITH.

## Downton Creepy

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5231.xml)

So, Terrible Jimmy and Ivy went to the movies and then afterward, they're making out and he sticks his hand up her skirt, RIGHT ON A BENCH IN THE MIDDLE OF DOWNTON, which is not only unsuitable but also COME ON JIMMY. What kind of seductor ARE you? ON A BENCH IN THE MIDDLE OF THE YARD? AFTER 30 SECONDS OF LIP? TOTALLY BY-PASSING SECOND BASE? HAVE SOME DECENCY. And THEN he calls her a tease! Into the well with ye, Jimmy!

## Downton Downer

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5232.xml)

"Every time I remember what you've been through, I want to MURDER," Bates tells Anna on their romantic night out. That's a direct quote. And Anna does not say, "you need to stop saying you want to murder people right now, because that's why I didn't tell you in the first place. Get a grip, Mr Bates!" She just says that she doesn't like that he sees her as a victim, and he goes and makes it all about himself and is all, "YOU'RE not a victim, I'M A FAILURE" because Anna's terrible violation is totally about Bates. Argh. Luckily, Cora pops up and offers them a ride home before I get TOO annoyed.

## Downton Ivy

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5233.xml)

Ivy tells Mrs Patmore and Hughes about Jimmy getting fresh, and then whines that maybe she SHOULD have gone for Alfred, because he'd never try to handle her business in the front yard, and Daisy LOSES IT, accusing Ivy of driving Alfred to "be alone in a city that terrifies him" -- like he didn't chose to do that and is sleeping, Harry Potter-style, in a cupboard somewhere -- and also accusing Ivy, by the transitive property, of breaking Daisy's heart, when Alfred left. And she notes that if Ivy had realized Alfred was nice earlier, she'd have spared them all a lot of grief. Mrs Hughes is like, "well, you had THAT coming," and it pains me to disagree with Mrs Hughes, but WTF.

a) Alfred is a grown-up and chose to go to London.

b) Alfred JUST TOLD YOU that he was never going to love you REGARDLESS, DAISY, so don't act like whether or not Ivy loved him had any effect on your life at all.

c) It's not Ivy's responsibility to watch out for whether or not DAISY has her heart broken, and it certainly isn't within the realm of human capabilities to think, "well, if I don't hook up with Alfred, he's still going to reject Daisy, so I better do it even though I don't want to, so that she gets hurt for a reason she randomly thinks is a more acceptable reason or some crazy shit like that."

d) It is totally okay for Ivy, who has just had a coworker try a stealth public fingerbang, to say, "wow, I sure wish I'd gone out with the really nice guy instead," off-handedly. NONE OF THIS IS IVY'S FAULT. AND I DON'T EVEN LIKE IVY.

## Downton Ugh

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5237.xml)

In which Cora tells Baxter she better not repeat the super juicy gossip that she just spilled about the fact that someone hurt Anna and it's causing major relationship trouble at Casa Bates. OH CORA.

## Downton Preggers

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5238.xml)

In which Edith cries and cries and also informs Lord G -- who's popped into the library to, I can only assume, look for his missing Gutenberg Bible -- that she knows he doesn't love her best, all because she's beset by hormones and also because her baby daddy has randomly gone missing in Germany/is running some kind of brutal long con involving unloading his newspaper on an unsuspecting and desperately horny heiress, presumably for financial reasons. THAT actually is what I think her signing that paperwork was all about. Say it with me: POOR EDITH.

## Downton Love Interests

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5243.xml)

A LOT happened in this episode, including the arrival of Evelyn Napier and his boss, who spars with Mary from the jump and ergo will presumably soon be jumping Mary. (There's a lot of BLAH about the study they're doing about the financial zzzz of grand estates, and a lot of YADDA about how WhatsHisName TOTALLY doesn't get Mary AT ALL but I suspect we'll have AGES to go over that.)

## Downton Nursery Talk

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5252.xml)

In which these three reflect on how madly in love they were with their NOW TOTALLY DEAD beloveds when they got engaged. It's basically like group therapy that's going to lead each of them into their next relationship. There's a very sweet remembrance from Mary of the night Matthew proposed in the snow and I am not over him yet either, girl.

## Downton Molesley

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5255.xml)

Oh, right: after a massive amount of passive-aggression from Carson, who DOES NOT WANT TO REHIRE MOLESLEY, after Molesley was insufficiently grateful the LAST time they tried to rehire him, Molesley is the new footman.

## Downton Surprise!

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5257.xml)

So, everyone is surprised that Rose has brought a London jazz band to the house -- presumably, in part because Jack Ross is black (Carson gives him a very awkward speech about how England was NOT DOWN WITH SLAVERY during which Mrs Hughes all but throws herself on his face to shush him)-- but everyone quickly realizes that Jack Ross and his band is totally entertaining and gets to dancing. "This is fun!" Lord G announces. As for me, I wish they'd hired an American to play American Jack Ross, because I spend all of his scenes listening to his accent, which is actually pretty decent in this episode. It is like 10% TOO carefully American, but it's getting there. Additionally, Rose's blue dress is LOVELY.

## Downton Tiaras

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5260.xml)

I'm just going to let you eyeball people's fancy ensembles as I go over the rest of the developments at Lord G's birthday dinner: Tom tells Isobel that he loves everyone at Downton but he's pretty sure he's never going to be able to get married again because you only get one shot at a free-spirited high-born lass (Isobel is like, "you never know; have we not seen multiple times this season along that this is changing world?"); Violet tells Lord G that Isobel is definitely feeling more like herself because she's driving her NUTS; Mary is called a hypocrite because she likes bacon but still feels bad about killing pigs. And, in my favorite moment, Edith wonders to Violet whether or not it's suitable that Rose has brought "this man" -- Jack Ross -- to the house, and Violet tells her not to be so provincial and sniffs, "try and let your time in London rub off on you a little more." Oh, it's rubbed off, Violet. It's rubbed off all too well. She's been overly rubbed off upon.

## Downton Aerial Shot

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5263.xml)

When I write a Downton drinking game, it's going to include the instruction to take a glug whenever they use this particular shot.

## Downton Scandal

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5270.xml)

After the party, at which everyone has the best time and agrees Jack Ross is lovely, Mary comes down to catch him before he leaves to ask him to send the bill to Lord G, and this is the face she makes when she sees Jack and Rose full-on macking on the servant's table. It's unclear whether THEY know she's seen them....

## Downton Kissing!

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5271.xml)

...but Rose's smudged lipstick is a dead giveaway. This ought to be interesting.

[Fug the Show: Downton Abbey recap, season 4, episode 6There's big trouble in Little Edith. And Bates actually says the line, "I want to murder," so that's fantastic for Anna, because she totally needs more problems. Additionally: Isobel and the Dowager Countess are Great Britain's best comedy team, and Rose has a variety of surprises up her sleeve. A NOTE ABOUT SPOILERS: I know you lovely people who live in the UK (and you lovely people who have been watching by less than legal means) have already seen this season. I trust that you will continue to be lovely and considerate and you will not spoil those of us here in the US as to what we have in front of us. Please keep the comments spoiler-free. We all sincerely, sincerely, really appreciate it. Thank you! (It goes without saying, I hope, that if you have NOT caught up through season three, then this will have spoilers for seasons one through three.) And now…to WANTING TO MURDER.![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/img_5166.xml)](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-downton-abbey-season-4-episode-5-02-2014/)