Cheno
This is exactly what I do when I'm hiding out in my bed: get up, put on my makeup, find my sunglasses, then do my hair and tie it all up in a scarf before getting BACK into bed and waiting for someone to come find me and ask what's wrong. Two minutes of attention is well worth an hour of primping for it.
Jennifer Aspen
All that gold looks a bit like she got felt up by King Midas. I also enjoy the implication that she eats the cupcakes as soon as she frosts them, hence the GIANT bowl on the table of fresh icing.
Annie Potts
I ASSUME this is Annie Potts' nightie? Because nothing else she's worn during any other daytime scenes could sleep four in the woods. I think Betty Draper slept in that every night she was pregnant with [insert child here].
Annie Potts
I also like to think her cake server was EXTREMELY carefully placed.
Cheno
See? Real hair. None of that drapery from last week. Or at least, if it's not real, it's a way, way better hoodwinking job.
The GCBs
You can tell the one on the left is the actual nice one, because her power-walking clothes are the least crazy (well, assuming you have her body, anyway). Jennifer Aspen looks like a creamsicle, Swingtown matched her beads to her perspiration blouse, and Cheno is REPEATING HER ONESIE. Yes, that terrycloth number made an appearance in the pilot. I guess her character would want everyone to know she is rich enough to own such a monstrosity, and thus would wear it all over town, but still. Bold, Cheno. Bold.
Annie Potts
Of course Annie Potts has a gun closet. And that's not a euphemism, either. Also interesting: Her dress is like the winter-scene version of her wallpaper.
Cheerleaders
Of COURSE that's what the head cheerleader wears. What's confusing to ME is that these girls are apparently on the same squad, yet are wearing totally different uniforms. I guess they save the rib mustache for the Top Dog.
Leslie Bibb
Cheno's character was exposed as the owner of the Booby Licious restaurant, so to try and salvage herself in the eyes of the community, she changes the uniforms to something less titillating. Double bonus: They can re-make Witness without needing to hire a costumer.
Cheno
And yet her cups put the C in "hypocrisy."
Jennifer Aspen
This poor child found out her husband had a frequent eater card at Booby Licious, and so she decides to try and sate all his fried food needs at home. I had no idea Laura Ashley made aprons for grease-tinged countertop sexual escapades.
Jennifer Aspen
Yes, that is a chicken wing she slid into her cleavage. The perfect accessory. Look for it in Vogue this fall.
Jennifer Aspen and Swingtown
We are in for a LOT of ruffles and fringe in this show's six-episode run, methinks. To the point where I'm surprised it didn't cause a global shortage.
Swingtown
When you need to unwind because your daughter's cheerleading costume just ripped open to expose her boob job to the world, and your gay husband was boffing his ranch hand at the time, you obviously turn to Garden & Gun.
Cheno
Lord help me, I don't hate that. I mean, it's busy, but it's not shorts, it's not pink, and nothing is swinging from it. It's TASTEFUL. I'm almost disappointed.
Leslie Bibb
Dudes, when your fake Hooters spankies don't even look good on Leslie Bibb -- LESLIE BIBB; HAVE YOU SEEN HER BODY? -- then you should just burn them and start over before they give her an unmentionable discomfort.
Leslie Bibb
After forcing Cheno to change back their uniforms, Leslie added this little bon mot on the back. I giggled a bit. I'm easy. After all, it IS in a very Christian font, so it must have the Lord's approval.