> ## Content Index > Fetch the complete content index at: https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/llms.txt > Use this file to discover other available public pages before exploring further. # Fug the Show: Hart of Dixie recap, episode 3-1 - URL: https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-hart-of-dixie-episode-3-1/ - Published: 2013-10-09T18:00:05.000Z - Updated: 2014-03-01T04:09:32.000Z - Author: Jessica - Tags: #wp, #wp-gallery, #slideshow, #Import 2026-10-07 07:35 ## LAVON! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3043.xml) So, like all good CW shows, we kick off with what is either a dream sequence or an illustrative coma -- but what actually (spoiler) turns out to be A PROPHETIC DREAM of Zoe's, in which she sees herself back in BlueBell, on a float in the Founder's Day Parade. A couple of things: 1) I am delighted to be reunited with Lavon, especially when he's wearing a seersucker three-piece suit. 2) Um, unless they cover this in episode two, the show totally ignores that ZOE HAS THE GIFT OF SIGHT. This is The CW, you guys. MILK THAT. 3) Pursuant to #2, have we not learned via *The Vampire Diaries* that any kind of Founder's Day event is likely to end in supernatural bloodshed? Now that we know Zoe is a WITCH, I fear this show is about to take a dark turn. ## MEATBALL ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3046.xml) Dream Meatball is DELIGHTED by Dream Zoe's return to Dream BlueBell. Everyone is, in fact. It's like a Zoe Hart Festival in her sub-conscious: An event that, given how much everyone in BlueBlue loves a Festival, could actually happen. ## Lemon? ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3050.xml) But when Zoe wakes up, she's actually stuck in an episode of *Grey's Anatomy*, except she's hallucinating BlueBellians everywhere she looks. Take Lemon, here, and our first instance of Hilarious Jamie King Pregnancy Disguises: The Scrubs and Giant Folder Combo. ## Rose! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3056.xml) So, it turns out that Zoe has a boyfriend here in New York -- it's five months since she left town, Jonah is out of the picture (that actor has a new series), she told the rest of BlueBell that she was never coming back via email (including Wade, who had just told her he was in love with her). The new boyfriend, Joel, is an adorably neurotic writer who seems like a REALLY GOOD PERSON and ergo, despite the fact that Zoe claims she could spend the rest of her life with him and he seems like a loving and smart person, I am dreading how the show is planning to get rid of him for the Surely Inevitable Zoe and Wade Reunion. Also, we need to take a moment to reflect on how Zoe can NEVER be single and how she perhaps needs to think about that, but also at the same time teach me how she manages to lure such a wide variety of cute, smart, straight, SINGLE men into her orbit, from big city to small town. Also, that's actually Rose, not a hallucination -- she's there on a Model UN field trip, and she lets Zoe know that, yeah, everyone in BlueBell is pretty irked that she abandoned them all without so much as a by-your-leave. OH! Also: blah blah blah, Zoe has to go back to BlueBell so that she can make Brick sign a letter of recommendation that she needs to get past the co-op board in the building where she and Poor Doomed Joel are buying a place. ## BlueBell! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3058.xml) So Zoe jets down to Alabama for the night, bearing bagels, wearing this super cute outfit, and finding the entire town in church for a town hall meeting -- except for Wade, of course, who is sprawling on his car and drinking a beer, like he do. ## Wade! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3060.xml) Stay golden, Pony Boy. ## Church! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3062.xml) Jaime King Pregnancy Disguise 2: Some Extra's Head. Everyone's in church getting the scoop: okay, so remember when [Tansy left town and George went on the road with LilyAnne "Run From Wade" Longergan?](https://gofugyourself.com/fug-the-show-the-hart-of-dixie-finale-05-2013?ref=go-fug-yourself.ghost.io). He hasn't come back -- he's basically missing -- and in his absence, those tools from Fillmore have sued them for ALL KINDS OF STUFF, and because George is the only competent lawyer in town, they're in all kinds of jams, the most recent one being that Fillmore has instituted a noise ordinance in advance of the Founder's Day Parade. Well, perhaps that will keep the vampires from finding you guys. ## Lavon's Pants! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3068.xml) Lavon is basically the only person who's happy to see Zoe -- well, Wade seems okay with it, but that's because his heart has walls. He cannot, however, let her have the guesthouse back, because his cousin Lynly is staying with him. And Carl Winslow tells her that the B&B is full-up and also HE DOESN'T WANT HER THERE. Everyone is REAL mad she abandoned them for the big city -- especially since they blame her for the George Leaves Town/Fillmore's Legal Onslaught/The Death of Fun in BlueBell fiasco. ## The Belles! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3069.xml) The Belles helpfully set up that they're pretty sure Lemon has a Secret Lover; behind them, the return of ToWanda is a successful one, because Tom is actually really funny in this scene, as he welcomes Zoe back enthusiastically and is reminded by Wanda that she's actually dead to them. (Wanda, I don't know that I will ever fully enjoy. She is too twee for me.) ## Lemon! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3070.xml) Jaime King Pregnancy Disguise 3: Giant Potted Flowers. Also, she totally does have a lover. A SHAMEFUL ONE. Her words, not mine. ## Annabeth! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3075.xml) AB is still wearing cute dresses, still dating Lavon, now working for Dr Tim Matheson, and being driven out of her mind by Lavon's cousin Lynly, who does stuff like force AB to cook gluten-free for her and then complain about her gluten-free cooking. AB, this was your problem with Lemon: If someone's behavior irks you, talk to them about it. Anyway, AB is like the only person other than Lavon who isn't in a fiery rage at Zoe, so she gives her all the rest of the gossip: Brick and Laura Bell Bundy DID NOT elope, so now he's extra cranky, and he shipped Magnolia off to boarding school, which makes BEAUTIFUL SENSE and I thrilled that the writers have gotten rid of her. I didn't wholly dislike Magnolia, but they don't need her every episode, and this way, they don't have to come up with ways to explain where she is all the time. ## The Rammer Jammer! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3077.xml) Jaime King Pregnancy Disguise 4: Coffee Cups. These two are talking about the return of Zoe Hart, of course. Lemon is worried about the state of Wade's Formerly Broken Heart, and he manfully assures her that he is fine. So brave, that Wade. So inexplicably shirted throughout this episode. ## Tim Matheson! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3078.xml) The obligatory Tim Matheson shot for those of you who demand such things. Basically, things conspire so that Zoe realizes if she wants Tim to sign her co-op recommendation (and for all of BlueBell to decide not to hate her), she better track down George and bring him back to town. ## Kitchen Pastry! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3084.xml) This one sad plate of gluten-free muffins is NOT ACCEPTABLE KITCHEN PASTRY. Lavon's kitchen is supposed to look like the backroom of a bakery; covered in cupcakes and cheesecake and scones, considerably more than any three people could consume in WEEKS, and impeccably food styled. I DEMAND THE RETURN OF KITCHEN PASTRY. ## An Inexplicable Bell! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3089.xml) You can't tell so well from this screengrab, but this outfit was CUTE. Adorable patterned skirt, saucy chartreuse shoes? *Hart of Dixie*, I have missed you. ## George! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3082.xml) In an extremely convenient moment, it turns out the schmo who's got his TV up too loud next door to Zoe at the crappy motel on the outskirts of town is George. And he's in full downward spiral. (This shot was one of my laugh-out-loud moments. He looks HORRIBLE. It's HILARIOUS.) ## Bumps! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3092.xml) Jaime King Pregnancy Disguise 5: Founder's Day Floral Arrangements! Zoe needs her help in corralling George. FOR THE GOOD OF THE CITY. ## Shambles! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3093.xml) Jaime King Pregnancy Disguise 6 and 7: A bag, a suit, and, later, the corner of a TV. ## George Triplex of Tragedy ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/georgemess.xml) George is seriously in a bad way. Just LOOK AT HIM. He is USING A PIZZA BOX AS A PILLOW. In short, he enjoyed being on the road with LilyAnne, until it made him realize he really wanted to settle down, but he's already chased off Tansy, and also the song he wrote with LilyAnne's help was all about his Zoe-related heartbreak, and it was a minor hit, and Tansy REALLY does not want to get back together with him now that he's written a longing ode to the woman she was worried he loved the entire time they were together. Small detail: I guess I can buy that George is living in the hotel to avoid talking to anyone in town, but couldn't he have just SAILED OFF ON HIS HOUSEBOAT? ## Golf! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3101.xml) He is, however, watching this kind of hilarious fake show called "Don Todd's Monster Golf Safari," which I basically wish were real. It can air along with *The Valley* on a new cable channel featuring fake TV shows from other TV shows. (Surely there are others that are currently slipping my mind.) This prompts Lemon to remind George how much she loves a training montage -- don't we all? -- and she forces him to do a bunch of sit-ups, cuts his hair, shoves him into his suit, and drags him to court to fight The Evil Scooter McGreevy in the Case of the Founders' Day Noise Ordinance... ## Live-Blogging! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3104.xml) ...a case which Dash is live-blogging, a live-blog that Tom is reading aloud to all the rest of the BlueBellians, because apparently no one else has a laptop. George, of course, saves the day (and the parade), and everyone is cool with Zoe again (mostly) for managing to find George just in time for him to win this court case despite being totally unprepared and also probably in a serious carb-fog. Brick even says he will happily sign her co-op recommendation, despite the fact that we've all watched TV before and are well-aware she will not need it at all. ## Crazy Earl! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3106.xml) Zoe misses her flight back to Neurotic New York Joel because Wade's dad, Crazy Earl, has blood poisoning and doesn't want to see Brick (he doesn't even know Zoe was gone, which was quite amusing, really). This of course means she and Wade get to stare quasi-longingly at each other all night long. WILL NO ONE THINK OF SWEET NEUROTIC JOEL? HE BROUGHT HER A BENTO BOX OF BEET SALAD AT WORK. THAT IS LOVE. ## Lemon + AB ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3107.xml) Jaime King Pregnancy Disguise 8: A plastic bin of dirty dishes. ## LEMON'S SECRET LOVER ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3109.xml) Jaime King Pregnancy Disguise 9: HER SECRET, SHAMEFUL LOVER, MEATBALL. I also laughed out loud at this reveal. I have no idea how the writers came up with this -- I suspect the conversation started with, "who's the least likely tertiary character for us to pair up with Lemon?" --- but it is really, really funny. ## Joel! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3110.xml) And because Zoe missed her fight, Joel comes down to BlueBell with her. I wonder if I enjoy Joel so much because I like dudes in glasses? Also because this show is really good at making each arm of a love triangle likeable. ## Lemon ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3111.xml) Jaime King Pregnancy Disguise 10: A table. ## Tansy! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3115.xml) In which we learn that Tansy has moved on from George and is now dating THE HATED ARCH-RIVAL OF BLUEBELL SCOOTER MCGREEVEY!! I cannot deny that when this scandal was revealed, I did literally gasp. ## Meatballs ARE Delicious ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3116.xml) Jaime King Pregnancy Disguise 11: Floral Arrangements in the Foreground. So, Lemon admits to Wade that she can't stop having sex with Meatball. "With Meatball, or *a* meatball?" Wade asks, noting that he would find both scenarios equally horrifying. ## FORMAL SHORTS ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3119.xml) OF COURSE Zoe is wearing sequined formal shorts to a small town parade. OF COURSE SHE IS: this was foretold by her Prophetic Dream. ## PomPoms ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3121.xml) Jaime King Pregnancy Disguise 12: Cheerleading paraphernalia! So, because Lemon is Lemon and seeing Zoe all lovely-dovey over Joel makes her irritated, she goes over to Zoe and wishes her good luck and god speed in the future and just HAPPENS to mention that Wade is also SUPER happy because he has moved on to a real, wonderful relationship....WITH HER. ## Trouble! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3128.xml) Oh, right: So, AB took my advice and basically asked Lynly when she was planning on moving out and Lynly had a full on bratty drama fit -- going so far as to wondering WHY NO ONE LOVES HER?!?!?!!? (Which is a complete put-on, and pretty amusing) -- and stormed off and ends up at the same bar as George, who she comes on to (suggesting they go back to his place and fool around and not talk about his problems, because "other people's problems are boring"). He seems into it. I can't WAIT until Lavon finds out George nailed his little cousin. He is going to be MAD. Kitchen pastry may be thrown! IF IT EVER COMES BACK. ## Cheers! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3129.xml) So, Zoe has such a good time at the parade, as foretold by the mists of time and space corralled by her great powers, that she wants to stay in BlueBell, and Joel is really, really nice and clearly loves her and is a writer and can do his work anywhere, and so -- despite being eaten alive by bugs and not being able to eat fried food without intestinal distress! -- he agrees to stay. It is to Joel's credit that he seems to enjoy the OTHER delights of BlueBell, and I hope things work out okay for him after The Powers That Be shove him off a cliff, because, as nice as he is, he's clearly not End Game. Wait, maybe he and LEMON can fall in love. ## romance! ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3133.xml) But that's going to be awfully awkward, given that -- having seen how cute Zoe and Joel are together -- Wade is fully in on pretending to be In True Love with Lemon. Jaime King Pregnancy Disguise 13: Pint Glasses, and they're doing a terrible job. REVENGE! No, wait. SCANDAL! No, wrong again. HART! [Fug the Show: Hart of Dixie recap, episode 3-1I must admit that I am delighted by the return of Hart of Dixie, and that I laughed aloud at least three times. They have a new costumer this season -- the previous one is now working on Reign, which I assume was by CW decree -- but don't worry: We still have plenty of formal shorts and really cute skirts. Come with me back to BlueBell, where we learn some shocking supernatural truths and and also keep track of how many different things Jaime King hides her pregnancy behind. (She had the baby this weekend, right in time to see the premiere.)![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3043.xml)](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-hart-of-dixie-episode-3-1-10-2013/)