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# Fug the Show: Hart of Dixie recap, season 3, episode 19
- URL: https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-hart-of-dixie-recap-season-3-episode-19/
- Published: 2014-04-30T20:00:16.000Z
- Updated: 2014-04-30T18:53:35.000Z
- Author: Jessica  
- Tags: #wp, #wp-gallery, #slideshow, #Import 2026-10-07 07:37

## Wade

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6466.xml)

Vivian is ducking Wade's calls because she's immature and she sucks. Also because, as she tells Zoe, she's trying to decide if she wants to get back together with her ex. But she's not telling WADE that and is instead just avoiding him because, as we said, she's immature and she sucks. Note: there was a throwaway moment here where we learn that Wade has a raccoon infestation. I don't know. It's BlueBell.

## Zoe

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6471.xml)

This sweatshirt on Zoe is quite cute; she wears SEVERAL cute outfits this episode, as she tootles around not telling people she's NOT GETTING INVOLVED. JUST SAY IT ZOE. I KNOW YOU HAVE GOOD INTENTIONS BUT STAY OUT OF IT. Also: Lavon is bummed because AB is peeved with him for being a dick about her dating Barry Watson. Don't worry, after a slightly ridiculous plotline involving dueling musical revues with the Owls (I don't know), both of which require the lighting expertise of Tom Long (?), who feels torn between two lovers feeling a fool and is ergo unable to perform sexually for Wanda (UGH), they make up.

## A-!

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6474.xml)

a) Jaime King looks FABULOUS in this FABULOUS dress, which I adore and covet. b) I'm not sure why Lemon is off in this weird little plot all by herself, exactly. In short: she goes to figure out why Fancie's has gotten an A- and not a straight A from the Dep't of Health, discovers that the health inspector is depressed because her dream of ballroom dancing (?) is dying on the vine now that her partner has lost a leg to a raccoon (I just made that part up so the raccoon would go off in the third act), and Lemon matches her with Brick (who of course can dance) as a way to perk her up/improve Fancie's grade. Brick, though, is called away on a "medical emergency" and Lemon partners her instead. It's actually very charming, but feels weird in an episode that already HAS a dance montage, and I can't figure out why Jaime King is being exiled away from the rest of the cast, plot-wise, in this episode. I mean, I think it just happened due to Unavoidable Reasons of Everyone Else's Plots Having Nothing To Do With Her Since They Were Kicked Off During Maternity Leave, but more Lemon is always better, is the thing.

PS: the "medical emergency" is Tom Long's inability to get an erection. I have said this before but never meant it more fully than I do now. I CANNOT.

## Owls

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6475.xml)

The Owls are saluting Lavon at some annual event -- didn't we just HAVE Man of the Year? How many men do the Owls salute? On the other hand, it's BlueBell -- despite the fact that he's really screwed up all kinds of stuff lately, namely their bid for the Fair and their relationship with the Belles. What you really need to know is that all these scenes with the Owls feature a LOT of reaction shots from an actual owl.

## Belles!

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6478.xml)

The Belles and their very cute parade of pink, however, have decided they will NOT take part in Whatever Salute To Lavon This Is, out of loyalty to AB. Sister before misters, etc.

## VIVIAN SUCKS

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6480.xml)

Vivian's dress is very cute, even if I think SHE TOO might be a bit of a sociopath. She is so straightforward about this Wade/Charles thing, which is part of her no-nonsense character, I guess? But it comes across sort of....dismissive? Or selfish? I don't know. I don't know if I ever got a handle on Vivian, other than that there is something about this performance where it feels like the actress has an emotional wall up with every other character she interacts with -- Zoe, Wade, her own child. Which actually worked very well for the first few episodes, where she was supposed to be stand-offish to Zoe, but is problematic for her bits with Wade and Harley. ANYWAY. Wade has asked Zoe to find out if Viv is avoiding him and guess what? The answer is yes! Because she doesn't know if she wants to break up with him or what. ZOE. NEVER GET INVOLVED WITH YOUR EX'S ROMANCES. It will not work well! You are a TERRIBLY INEPT MEDDLER.

## Cute

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6481.xml)

But a crazy cute dresser, because how good is this? Anyway, after a WHOLE lot of hoodle, Wade of course weasels it out of Zoe that Vivian is trying to choose between him and Charles and asks her to put in a good word for him and JUST GO TALK TO HER YOURSELF, DUDE. THIS IS SO DUMB OF YOU.

## SUCK IT

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6482.xml)

This was kind of great, though. Cricket -- who was on *Mad Men* last week, YOU GO GLEN COCO -- and Eloise come over to inform the Owls, in song, that they will not be performing at their Roast and Toast. It goes something like this, "You showed up drunk on AB's door/ You basically called her Gainey's whore/ Well, you won't get away with that no more/ So there'll be no Belles at the Toast and Roast/ So SUUUUUUUUCK IT, LAVON HAAAAYES." It was pretty great. Also great? Earlier, someone referred to Lavon's complaints about AB dating Barry Watson as "Gainey-shaming." I laughed.

## Whooooo.

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6484.xml)

The Owl is not amused. But perhaps the owls are not what they seem.

## Pie

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6487.xml)

This frock on Lemon brings me great joy. It's as retro as you'd want for pie delivery.

## Ugh

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6494.xml)

First of all, I'm really sorry that I didn't get a picture of Wet Wade here -- I just spaced out in the face of Vivian's 1991 Wet Seal bodysuit or whatever this is. He walks over to Vivian's -- in the rain for maximum swoonability -- and pleads his case AS HE SHOULD and they hook up and man, Wilson Bethel is SELLING IT in this scene and there is just no chemistry there. I really would have thought he'd have chemistry with a screen door. But he TRIES, man, does he try and sell it here. And props for that. The thing is, it's also kind of hard to sell a plot where everyone in the audience is thinking, "and THIS is how they're getting rid of Vivian," but I kind of wish we could have been more invested, just from the standpoint of Good Angst.

## Dance

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6498.xml)

Then there was a mash-up dance-off between the Belles performing Katy Perry's "Roar," and the Owls performing "Brotherhood of Man" from *How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying*, so....those are not the same things, but okay, and I wish I could say that I thought this was charming and adorable but it was actually a little much for me. I don't know. I'm sorry.

## What!

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6507.xml)

And then they realize they both need the Lighting Board of Tom Long for their respective dueling events, and that kicks off the Tom And Wanda Are Trying To Get Pregnant But Tom's Penis Is Really Delicate And If He Gets Stressed It Won't Work and you guys, I am sorry, but I cannot recap a C plot about Tom Long's erectile dysfunction.

## Cute

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6508.xml)

In which we learn that Brick spent the weekend listening to Don Todd's biography on tape, despite having already read the book. "It's a different story when the man READS IT TO YOU."

## Strictly Ballroom

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6515.xml)

This is for you, Tim Matheson lovers. He is light of foot and charming of tux! And then he has to abandon everyone to tend to Tom Long's Shy Wang.

## Gazebo

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6517.xml)

Wanda manages to broker a peace between these two so that she can get impregnated. Whatever gets me out of talking about Tom's long.

## PANTS WHAT

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6520.xml)

This pantsuit is a major no-go for me. ANYWAY, Harley might have broken his arm -- he didn't -- but his Incredibly Low Stakes Medical Scare (this show is not great at pulling off legit medical scares; remember when Brick had a brain fog for like three weeks and then it got fixed in two seconds?) Brings his Parent Back Together As We Knew It Would.

## George

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6523.xml)

OH RIGHT. GEORGE. I forgot about George. In an attempt to forget how awesome it was that time he had sex with Lemon, he lets Pastor Gonorrhea set him up with this nice Sunday school teacher he knows; she turns out to be WILD, and getting under her lets him get over Lemon. Ta-dah!

## Tom Long

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6524.xml)

You should, however, know that Tom Long and his erectile dysfunction sleep fully covered in pictures of cats. Hee.(Also, I hope Tom Long's Erectile Dysfunction is the name of the band that played the HoD wrap party.)

## Lemon

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6528.xml)

Lemon decides to be May The Health Inspector's ballroom dance partner, and they take seventh place, as Lemon looks charming in menswear. And then they go over to Fancie's to re-grade her health inspection....

## Yikes

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6533.xml)

And find this. They get a C on the regrade, and Lemon is ENRAGED, rightly, and George is actually really annoying. He is totally delighted by her rage, because her rage is annoying to him, and he isn't distracted by lust. UM, GEORGE? Her rage is actually totally justified here, and you shouldn't find her annoying. You should be apologetic that you just really screwed up -- health department grades are a big deal, and this is your BUSINESS. GOD. She's right to be mad at you and you should be sorry, not annoyed, and *certainly* not delighted to be annoyed. Also, this is gross. You work there!

## Sad Wade

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6529.xml)

Meanwhile, because Zoe has pointed out to Wade that just because Vivian nailed him, it doesn't mean she's CHOOSING HIM, he's all sad man with a guitar. Also, again, Vivian, you suck. A dude knows you're trying to choose between him and Suitor B, and you sleep with him, but make NO COMMENT about whether this means anything vis a vis The Choice (even, "I don't want you to get the wrong idea, I still haven't decided anything"), then you are kind of an asshole.

## Cute

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6535.xml)

AB's dress is crazy cute as she and Lavon decide they need to get along for the good of the people of BlueBell.

## Smile!

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6537.xml)

And Zoe's shirt is deliciously ironic when Wade shows up at Vivian's to find her babysitting Harley BECAUSE VIVIAN AND CHARLES WENT TO BATON ROUGE TO LOOK FOR A PLACE TO LIVE AND VIVIAN DIDN'T EVEN TELL WADE IT WAS OVER HERSELF OR THAT SHE WAS LEAVING BECAUSE VIVIAN IS THE WOOOOOORST. THE WORST. And so ZOE has to tell him, which means Vivian is also a really shitty cousin, putting Zoe in this position, and then WADE GETS MAD AT ZOE for, like, not trying hard enough to SAVE HIS RELATIONSHIP FOR HIM OR SOME SHIT LIKE THAT. I CANNOT WITH YOU PEOPLE. Zoe should not have gotten involved here, but you kinda forced the issue, Wade, and NONE OF THIS IS HER FAULT. NONE OF IT. I CAN'T

[Fug the Show: Hart of Dixie recap, season 3, episode 19In which Vivian is just the worst, Wade is RIDICULOUS, and Zoe is incapable of saying the words, "wow, I am not getting involved." There are two dance-related plot lines (and, accordingly, two dance scenes encompassing three dances, which might be too much dancing for 42 minute show that's not a dance competition), and we're forced to think about Tom's penis. I....don't know. One the other hand, people looked cute in this one.![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/img_6466.xml)](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-hart-of-dixie-recap-season-3-episode-19-04-2014/)