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# Fug the Show: Revenge recap, episode 202
- URL: https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-revenge-episode-202/
- Published: 2012-10-09T16:00:20.000Z
- Updated: 2014-03-01T04:29:52.000Z
- Author: Jessica  
- Tags: #wp, #wp-gallery, #slideshow, #Import 2026-10-07 07:31

## revenge!!!!!

![](https://storage.ghost.io/c/bf/b9/bfb99790-924d-4e41-a7e6-5e3c6e04fe57/content/images/static-gofugyourself-com/uploads/2012/10/img_0303.png)

Emily has a dream about her mother turning into Victoria that I am sure is supposed to be profound, but which just makes me feel somewhat better about the state of Jennifer Jason Leigh's face. Apparently, she just looks weird when she's in restraints at the Mental Institution That The Graysons Forgot To Burn Down. We also learn a fact of great importance: JJL is incapable of air-drumming during the correct moment in songs, something which will surely come into play later when she and Victoria have a long-anticipated car-sing-off.

## REVENGE?

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0304.png)

Nolan's robe is smart. For her part, Emily has been sleeping on the sofa because she spends all her time watching Victoria via the Clam Cam Nolan has hooked up at Victoria's Antler-ridden Secret Catskills Hideaway. Victoria, for her part, is really helpfully having all of her secret conversations in the living room and apparently never goes to the kitchen, the bathroom, the bedroom, or the backyard.

She is also apparently still plotting to kill Emily; Emily is really not that worried about this, mostly because something something Charlotte something something. Nolan and I both look skeptical about this entire thing, mostly because Emily has a habit of speaking in platitudes and never just says, "hey, I'm going to steal Charlotte and hold her for emotional ransom because Victoria would never kill me if I have her daughter and everyone knows it."

## REvenGE

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0307.png)

Next door, Ashley is definitely living at Grayson Manor, and her basic modus operandi appears to be to try to distract Daniel with her ass every time Daniel takes his open mouth and tries to do math with it; here, she tries to lure him into a tennis match, but he can't join her because something something Conrad's been something something lying about the company's income something something something.

She also can't lure him onto the courts because Emily calls and Daniel can not resist Emily. Emily helpfully tells Daniel that Charlotte's doctor is a fraud, and Daniel doesn't even wonder how Emily can find this out when a simple GOQUESTGO search doesn't turn anything up. Part of the appeal of Daniel for Emily must be how Daniel just believes everything she tells him and never asks her how she knows anything.

## reveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeenge

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0314.png)

For someone with multiple Ninja Masters and a contract out on her life, you'd think Emily would sense a disturbance in the force and realize there's A DUDE IN FATIGUES AND BINOCULARS OUT ON HER SAND DUNES SPYING ON HER. She doesn't. The good news for her is that Accented NoName here appears to have her best interests at heart.

## Dr Revenge

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0315.png)

Charlotte could not be less interesting to me if she were the tax code. All you need to know is that she's more down-to-earth now, which you can tell because she's wearing a cable knit sweater, and that Daniel gets her sprung from Promises: Hamptons, and she is totally ungrateful because she thinks he's doing it to get her trust fund money, or something.

This episode, in fact, had a larger than usual number of twists turning on money-based plot points, which had the overall effect of making it feel both confusing and a little overworked. Can't people just be throwing people down wells and blowing up their boats, already?

## Totally Revenge.

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0321.png)

Speaking of boats, this tool -- you can tell the show wants you to think he's a tool because he looks so very preppy; all the salt-of-the-earth Good Guys on *Revenge* wouldn't be caught dead wearing such a crisp shirt -- is named Trey Chandler, he goes to school with Poor Poor Declan, and he eventually takes advantage of Declan's poor poorness by paying him $500 to hold a bracelet he claims he stole from his stepmother, and Declan Makes Bad Choices, so he agrees to do this. Oh, Declan. This is going to end with you in jail.

## Re + ven = ge

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0326.png)

OH GOOD MORE MATH. Nolan is getting audited; Rebecca from *Greek* wants him to hire a CFO. Despite her not being qualified AT ALL -- by her accounting of it NO PUN INTENDED -- he hires her. This is fine with me for two reasons: Rebecca from *Greek* is awesome and I am glad she is working, and also the prospect of being audited has popped Nolan's collar -- literally.

## REVENGE

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0329.png)

He also does conference calls in lobster-covered boxers. I LOVE YOU, NOLAN.

Because Emily has ZERO sense of humor, his pantslessness leads to her suggestion that he get on the ball and find himself a house to buy (Nolan claims there's "no inventory in the Hamptons") before she goes outside and has an awkward convo with Amanda, who wails about how much she loves Jack and gets Emily to promise to fix her DNA test to make sure he comes up as the father to her fetus. Yes, you totally want humorless sociopath Emily Thorne poking around your medical records.

## rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrevvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvenge

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0333.png)

Meanwhile, Ashley trots over to tell Conrad that Daniel is on to his Financial Shenanigans, and if you think the fact that she is currently walking around in Tight Victoria-esque Sheath Dresses is a coincidence, you do not watch a lot of TV.

## REVENGE!

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0335.png)

DANIEL IS REAL MAD THAT HIS DAD SOMETHING SOMETHING MONEY SOMETHING TRUST FUND SOMETHING BOARD OF DIRECTORS SOMETHING CHARLOTTE!!

## REVENGE

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0338.png)

But at least he looks good in his suit.

## CALL A PLUMBER

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0343.png)

Meanwhile, this pipe at the Declan And Jack Sad Pub of No Booze has been leaking for A WEEK STRAIGHT. Where is all of Hamptons going for cheap booze right now? WILL NO ONE ADDRESS THIS SERIOUS PROBLEM?!

## REWENGAY

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0350.png)

Okay, so Charlotte has Emily drive her down to Antlerville to rendezvous with Victoria and because her trust fund is empty now, she has stolen all kinds of precious metals from Grayson Manor for Victoria to sell and live on because it's really easy to fence a tiara without anyone getting suspicious. Charlotte also doesn't want to leave the country anymore because Emily took her out to see Amanda and now she thinks she has to stay home for the birth of her niece or nephew, like I am so sure this character cares so much about Amanda that she would abandon her presumed dead mom. Charlotte really is the character that just does whatever the writers need her to do to move stuff along.

ANYWAY. You can imagine how annoyed Victoria is at all of this, not the least because any day she remains stuck in her hideyhole is another day she has to wear these sensible slacks. She pretends she only cared about Charlotte's money in the first place and kicks her poor sad plot-device out of Antlerville. (She is also REALLY relieved that Daniel didn't impregnate Emily, because she doesn't even KNOW that now Daniel is banging the help. I can't WAIT for that news to come out.)

## REVENGE

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0357.png)

"I AM SO MAD ABOUT SOMETHING SOMETHING TRUST FUND SOMETHING SOMETHING! STILL!!!!"

## Re...venge....

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0359.png)

"Hello? Oh, hey, Victoria, what's up? You're not dead? Cool. No, no, everyone on this show answers calls from Unknown Numbers instead of letting them go to voicemail, it's fine. What's that? You're blackmailing me again? Cool. Meet you under the antlers later and we can figure out how we can get you out of those sensible pants and back onto the show."

## Carrie

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0362.png)

"Hey, what am I doing here? Is anyone confused? Can I make you a giant information board? I am not at all surprised to find out that Victoria knows Abu Nazir, now that I've thought about it. OH, this is just a Showtime commercial. I get it now. Sorry, I thought I got beamed into another show somehow. But while I'm here, I'd just like to take a moment and tell you that I think Emily's tactics are mostly FUCKING BULLSHIT! TEAM VICTORIA! See you all later tonight!"

## REVENGE

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0365.png)

"Congrats! It really IS your baby, although Emily told me it wasn't and that I owe her one for having to fix the paternity test! But it is! But I don't know that! But literally no one ever tells anyone the truth on this show ever about ANYTHING which is why it's weird that I didn't just figure out to do a paternity test on my own and then falsify the results if I had to! I had the wherewithal to kill a man in a parking lot and now I am just a mess! Cigar?"

## revenge

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0367.png)

"SOMETHING SOMETHING WE'RE NOT MAD AT EACH OTHER ANYMORE HAVE SOME OF MY INHERITANCE NONE OF THIS MATTERS SINCE VICTORIA IS ALIVE SO WHAT IS THE POINT SOMETHING SOMETHING!"

## REVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEGNE

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0368.png)

"Don't worry, y'all, I just made Conrad punch me and handcuff me to a radiator so we could pretend I was being held for ransom for MONTHS without him ever calling the Feds, all so we could get our white-haired hitman off my back about threatening to kill ME and then we could frame him for a bunch of shit because WE JUST LOVE FRAMING PEOPLE. And Conrad finally extracted me by....you know, just calling the police eventually. No NO, don't worry about the police! The police NEVER ask questions about ANYTHING on this show EVER! Take me away from these antlers and back to my pencil skirts!!"

## revenge revenge revenge

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0372.png)

"I said my PENCIL SKIRTS, not my CHILD. I guess she will do for now. Forget all that mean stuff I said about not being able to fence that tiara! I was kidding, and also I can fence anything I want! Listen to me do a whole lot of exposition, and then everyone RELAX! I AM BACK IN THE HAMPTONS!"

## Revengggggggeee

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0375.png)

CONRAD: "No, no, I was using Charlotte's inheritance to pay the kidnappers! YES! THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS DOING. THAT IS A GREAT IDEA."

## Revenge

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0377.png)

Next door, because it is a GREAT idea for him to be hanging out next door to Grayson Manor, The White-Haired Hitman (in exchange for the Clam Cam video of...everything, which will exonerate him) helpfully tells Emily that Victoria looks like a BAD ASS in her sunglasses.

Oh, and also that Victoria had JJL committed (?I think) because her testimony about...something....was going to prevent....Victoria from marrying David Clarke...and then...something about the plane crash? I don't freaking know. This show is a little too twisty a little too soon this season. Next thing you know, it's going to be like *Pretty Little Liars*, where I have NO IDEA what's going on and I don't even know people's names.

## Revenge!

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0381.png)

After being helpfully expository, White Haired Dude tries to slit Amanda's throat. (Nolan isn't home because....they had a conversation about how he needs his own place? So...he went out to look at places? In the middle of the night? I don't even know.) It always makes awesome sense when a murderer tells you all kinds of useful information before killing you.

## Revenge!

![](https://static.gofugyourself.com/uploads/2012/10/IMG_0382.png)

Luckily, Emily was still being surveilled by Accent McNoName, who shoots White-Haired Hitman and SAVES HER! REVENGE!

[Fug the Show: Revenge recap, episode 202One of my favorite things about this show is that it is bookended with voiceovers from Amanda that are so Ponderous and Metaphorical that they make the VOs Chris Carter used to write for every Very Special X-Files sound as straightforward as a grammar textbook. I'm real fond of this show, but this episode was kind all over the place.![](https://storage.ghost.io/c/bf/b9/bfb99790-924d-4e41-a7e6-5e3c6e04fe57/content/images/static-gofugyourself-com/uploads/2012/10/img_0303.png)](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-revenge-episode-202-10-2012/)