> ## Content Index > Fetch the complete content index at: https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/llms.txt > Use this file to discover other available public pages before exploring further. # Fug the Show: Revenge recap, Episode 305 - URL: https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-revenge-episode-305/ - Published: 2013-10-29T17:00:51.000Z - Updated: 2014-03-01T04:26:04.000Z - Author: Jessica - Tags: #wp, #wp-gallery, #slideshow, #Import 2026-10-07 07:35 ## Hey Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3441.xml) So, remember how Aidan told Conrad that Jack sabotaged his car? Now Aidan and Emily are trying to figure out who REALLY did it. SPOILER: it was Patrick. We don't know if it was at Victoria's request, but my assumption is yes. Also, apparently, Patrick left a brake-fluid encrusted tool of stabbery in his room, which seems quite stupid and makes me think it's totally possible he was framed. At any rate, Victoria has CHARLOTTE take the blame because the writers wanted a scene where you think Charlotte actually did something interesting, and Charlotte agrees to do it because it will save Jack. The question remains, of course, ISN'T CHARLOTTE CONCERNED THAT THERE'S A MURDERER ON THE LOOSE? ## Revenge in the Sky With Diamonds ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3443.xml) Margaux continues to be rather sassy and likeable in a series of dresses that flatter her shoulders and Jack, while useless, is at least shirtless. I cannot even tell you how many scenes we got this week of Jack yelping about Emily needs to finish her BLAH BLAH BLAH. It would be so much more interesting if he actually did go evil instead of spending all his time bemoaning how much the Hamptons and the Graysons suck. Sell the bar and move, dude! Anyway, Margaux invites Jack to be her date to the big *Voulez* premiere party and he is a sad sack about it, and she manages to talk him into it, but SPOILER: He ditches because Aidan tells him to leave town before Conrad has him killed, but all he does is just take Baby Carl out of town because Nick Wechsler has a contract. ## All You Need is Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3451.xml) It's striped shirts and vests day at Grayson Manor! Anyway, in short, Aidan hates his life. He's in love with a woman who is really terrible at revenge despite being fixated upon it, and NOW he has to dress just like Conrad in order to subtly gain his trust. SPOILER: Conrad cannot be swayed by similarities in wardrobe but he does agree to let Aidan screw with Jack/help him talk Charlotte into not hating his guts anymore because it totally makes sense to let a mysterious henchman smooth our your inter-familial dramas. ## Revenge Loves You ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3454.xml) Daniel apologizes to Patrick for being such a total ass at all times. SPOILER: Patrick could not care less about the bizarrely-accented words coming out of Daniel's tiny tiny mouth, but he is willing to provide the art for the new lobby at *Voulez*, and I personally would like to congratulate everyone who works at *Revenge* for setting a scene OUTSIDE in NATURAL SUNLIGHT. It's a delicious change for the better. ## Revengeday ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3459.xml) SPOILER: In this slide, I'm going to complain about how played out these scenes where Victoria and Emily pretend to be civil but actually hate each other are. Victoria is totally jerky to Emily, but Emily is INSANELY patronizing to Victoria, and we've seen this dynamic approximately 600 times over the last three seasons. Can we come up with a new way for them to communicate -- say, like actual people? Even if they ARE people who hate one another's guts, they probably wouldn't use a sickly sweet tone of voice for literally very word they speak. ## Eight Days a Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3462.xml) Victoria is never going to let Charlotte wear this bridesmaid dress, because she thinks it's hideous. SPOILER: She's correct. Additionally, one of you noted on Twitter (I believe) that all of a sudden, Christa B Allen's performance is straight out of the *Days of Our Lives* school of acting, and I must agree. She is terrible in this scene, to the point where I literally cannot tell whether she is intending to be shocked when Victoria tells her that Emily had an affair with Jack, or if she's being sarcastic. I think she's being sincere? I am starting to kind of feel for her. The writers have NO IDEA what's going on with this character, clearly, and it doesn't seem like anyone's giving her any direction. So it's rather like she tried to pull the crashing car that is her performance to safety herself but accidentally ran it into a tree. ## Love Me Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3464.xml) Patrick awesomely tells Nolan that he knows Nolan snooped into his past and that he's a liar, and that it's total BULLSHIT and completely not cool. SPOILER: I'm pretty sure he's lying when he says he doesn't play games, but he has a point when he tells Nolan that normal people do not pay their crush's ex twenty thousand dollars for dish. Just make out again, you two! ## Revenge Together ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3465.xml) "This cover is HIDEOUS. SPOILER: It's weird I don't have any information about Emily's family or any pictures at all of her or them for this big article we're writing about your wedding." Riddle me this: If you are marrying into so-called high society, and you know that, therefore, people are going to write about you, and you have to at least HAVE a backstory about your family that you are WILLING TO TROT OUT when they ask, wouldn't you at least frame a fake photo and stick it on your piano? ## Twist and Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3470.xml) "Hey, dude. Leave town, okay? Both for the good of my misguided romance with Emily and because a ton of people want to smash your face in." SPOILER: Jack will NOT go quietly into that good night. In fairness, pretty much everyone in the Hamptons totally doesn't care that the last year of Jack's life has SUPER sucked, but it's pretty nice of Aidan to actually give him fair warning that it's about to get suckier. ## Here Comes the Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3474.xml) It's also nice of Emily to match her top to her home accessories, right? Very Martha Stewart of her. Anyway, she's giving Nolan all her spy-gear because she plans to have Daniel back in the house sooner than later. SPOILER: She eventually pulls this off via a sob story (somewhat true) about how her youthful pain and loss means it's hard for her to love. Additionally, she tells Nolan that Aidan's in charge of figuring out who went all destructo on Conrad's car and he says, "oh, great. Because everything went just PITHY last year when he was on the case." Given that Nolan later points out that he has a genius IQ, you'd think he would know that pithy means "succinct" (or, if you're a citrus fruit, "covered in pith") and the expression that I assume he's going for is, "just PEACHY." Additionally, Nolan is kind of like, "don't you think all this plotting is kinda harshing all our love lives?" and she doesn't care, but it IS true. Love lives have totally been harshed because of her machinations. ## A Day in the Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/shirtless-aidan.xml) SPOILER: This show is aware that what it lacks in tight story-telling, it more than makes up for in beefcake. ## Across the Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3483.xml) Victoria tips Emily off to the fact that Conrad thinks Jack is trying to kill him, mostly with the hopes that she will ditch the *Voulez* launch (and Daniel) to run to Jack and SPOILER SHE DOES. Emily. Just TEXT JACK. STAY ON FOCUS. Not the least because every single scene with Jack and Emily is basically treading the exact same story point, and it's not much fun at this point. ## The Long and Winding Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3491.xml) "You look FANTASTIC," Daniel says, but SPOILER: Charlotte's dress fits terribly. ## I Saw Her Revenging There ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/jumpsuit.xml) This jumpsuit is unflattering, and that is not a spoiler. These two have -- SPOILER! -- the same convo they've had 90 other times about Jack and how Emily is really terrible at revenge, but Aidan loves her anyway for reasons that this show hasn't really articulated very well. Aidan loves Emily, Emily loves Jack, Jack might love Margaux eventually, and let's have it that Marguax is secretly in love with Nolan, who is of course in love with Patrick, who probably loves his mother. There you go, show. Run with it! ## All My Revenging ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3500.xml) "Hello, Nolan. My biceps are the real work of art." Nolan apologizes to Patrick for being such a total weirdo and SPOILER: this scene was actually quite good, mostly because Gabriel Mann is probably the best actor on this show, and Justin Hartley is good at taking a scene with no subtext and giving it some, thanks to his stint on soaps. ## Can't Buy Me Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3501.xml) Margaux's father hates the new magazine, but no one could hate her fabulous dress. Victoria gives her some very good advice, namely that she needs to stop letting men control her and start learning how to control them. SPOILER: Margaux uses this advice to run over to Jack and tell him off for ditching the party. ## In My Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3503.xml) And Daniel finally finally grows a pair and breaks up with Emily when she FINALLY gets to the party, SUPER late. SPOILER: This is problematic for her plan to marry him for revenge. Nolan points out that all people want is honesty in their relationship (he's learning), and Emily SQUEALS that she CAN'T STAND to be around Daniel and Nolan is like, "UM MAYBE THAT'S WHY HE BROKE UP WITH YOU." ## Revenge Submarine ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3507.xml) I just thought this reaction shot was cute (Victoria is considering setting Patrick up with some cute eligible men). No spoilers warning needed there. ## Revenge in the USSR ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3512.xml) Marguax's still real mad Jack stood her up. SPOILER: She gets over it when he sticks his tongue down her throat/explains that the bar got broken into. That's technically true? Anyway, Emily watches from behind a wall as they make out -- she was there to steal a photo of Amanda and her parents to pass off as her own to Daniel -- and makes faces like she ate some bad hummus. ## Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Revenge ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3520.xml) I'd like to reiterate that there is hardly any reason at all for Charlotte to agree to confess, even to her father, to ATTEMPTED MURDER, and as much as Conrad loves her, it is BIZARRE for ANYONE to say, essentially, "if trying to murder me and in doing so KILLING A PRIEST is what it took for us to make up, I'M SUPER COOL WITH THAT." SPOILER: THIS PLOT IS A MESS. I am sorry that it WASN'T actually Charlotte, frankly. ## Eleanor Revengeby ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3525.xml) Also, the way this skirt lies makes her look like she's wearing tighty-whities over her leather leggings. ## Good Day Revengeshine ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3524.xml) "Let's make out in public even though you're engaged to another dude!!" SPOILER: No one catches them even though they're IN PUBLIC. DON'T MAKE OUT WITH YOUR SECRET LOVER IN PUBLIC. ## I Am The Revengerus ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/victoria-balcony.xml) SPOILER: The production is confused about how high, exactly, the tide comes up behind Victoria. ## Lady Revengenna ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3527.xml) Emily tells Daniel her sad sad story about how her childhood pain has caused her to build oh-so-many walls and SPOILER: The shock of her emotional honesty finally enables him to close his mouth (and get back together with her). ## Paperback Revenger ![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3535.xml) At least there's still some Nolan/Patrick making out. SPOILER: REVENGE! [Fug the Show: Revenge recap, Episode 305Team Victoria.![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/img_3441.xml)](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/fug-the-show-revenge-episode-305-10-2013/)