The Abdication
We open with a flashback to The Abdication, and it must be noted that although Wallis was a TERRIBLE PERSON who (amongst other awful awful, awful things) made British agents return to Nazi-occupied France during WWII to FETCH A SWIMSUIT SHE FORGOT TO PACK WHILST FLEEING, she is very chic. This dress is amazing. It probably was a nice swimsuit that she left behind.
The Queen Mum's Mum-in-Law
Guess who was really pissed about Son Number One abandoning his duty for a divorcee/perhaps also about the fact that he's really a total dink? Three episodes in, and I can tell that Mary of Teck is going to be the Dowager Countess of this series -- the writers cannot resist giving her good zingers and her total disdain for people makes me feel better about the world.
The Brother
I just want to note that I cannot imagine how much drama must have ensued in the royal family during the process leading up to Edward's abdicating. From what I understand -- please correct me if I'm wrong -- there was a general feeling that Edward wasn't going to be a particularly good King in the first place, which is perhaps borne out by the fact that he chose his personal life over what I'm sure he was raised to believe was his duty. He makes a lot of wah wah waaaah here about how his brother Bertie will be a better king, anyway, because HE has a loving family and NO ONE'S EVER LOVED POOR EDWARD EXCEPT THE AMERICAN HE'S DITCHING THE WHOLE COUNTRY FOR and it's amazing what the emotional demarcations are between romanticism and selfishness, now that I'm older. Anyway, there was some nice emotional work in this scene from Jared Harris, again, as he watches Elizabeth listen to Edward's final speech. There is much to discuss in terms of how Edward could decide to take this huge responsibility and just foist it off onto his brother and, eventually Elizabeth -- and the show gets into this -- but given that Edward had no children at this point, she WAS in line for the throne anyway, when he stepped down. I know that the thought was that he would eventually marry someone and their line would take over, but it wasn't out of the realm of reality that she would be queen regardless, yes?
The Palace
There is some AMAZING b-roll in this episode as well; you can tell that Netflix spent their budget well.
The Hallway
What did I tell you about the interiors? AMAZING.
The Conclave
Anyway, the royal family is in the midst of planning the funeral, dealing with the transition to Elizabeth as Queen (emotionally and logistically), and figuring out what the hell it's supposed to do with Edward when he comes back -- especially given that they HATE HIM. Particularly the Queen Mum, who blames him for stepping down and placing the huge stress on her husband that she believed hastened his death; and his own mother, who literally says the words, "He killed my other son." (Note: I know Edward informally went by David, the last of his middle names, but it's too blooming confusing. I'm just going to call him Edward.)
FYI, this interior set is stunning and feels extremely accurate, judging primarily from all the time I've spent in Buckingham Palace (AKA approximately three hours).
The Queen Mum is REAAAAAALLLY snappy and mean in this scene toward Elizabeth, also, which doesn't feel like a totally true characterization. She, for example, tells QE2 the snarky nickname that Edward uses for her ("Shirley Temple") even after Elizabeth says she'd rather not know. (He calls Churchill "Crybaby" and the Queen Mum "Cookie," not as in the delicious sweet treat, but because he thinks she looks "common" and "dumpy," "like a cook." WHAT A PLEASURE HE IS.)
The Edward
AND NOW HE'S BACK! And no one is happy to see him. Let me tell you, he is one smarmy, scheming man, who will basically do whatever so that his allowance isn't cut off. (He's also VERY WORKED UP about the fact that Wallis was denied the HRH, which is HILARIOUSLY tone-deaf of him. Learn to read the room, Edward!)
The Gallery Wall
LOOK AT THIS ROOM. I believe this is supposed to be Marlborough House, which is where Mary of Teck lived (and died). You can visit it one weekend a year and by guided tour -- the internet tells me -- and I wish you would. There's apparently a vast pet cemetery in the back, which is always a great idea. (I'm sorry this photo is so small -- I screwed up slightly getting the screen grabs. Hopefully the MAJESTY of this Gallery Wall still compels you. This is my dream living room, because I am an eccentric hoarder.)
The Grieving Mother
Let's just note that Mary of Teck is NOT. HAVING. ANY OF THIS. She gives Edward a SUPER passive-aggressive speech about how BERTIE was the PERFECT son and ALL THE REST OF HER CHILDREN ARE HIDEOUS GARBAGE PEOPLE and also he better act right on this trip or everyone's REALLY going to hate him going forward.
The Books
Yes, yes, it's very interesting to see Elizabeth dive into her new job as queen but I also want to talk about those built-ins.
The Churchill
Interesting tid-bits in here, which Churchill has to tell QE2: She isn't supposed to give him a snack, and she's not supposed to let him sit down, because whatever they have to discuss ought to be able to be accomplished in twenty minutes. That seems...efficient but joyless.
The Ceiling
We need to talk about how BALLER the ceiling is here at Lord Mountbatten's extremely fancy abode. He and Phil are talking about how AMAZING it's going to be that the next King is going to be A MOUNTBATTEN! Fruit of their loins, men of their bodies!! Look, I get this -- I guess. Philip feels blah blah emasculated blah blah blah and giving the kids his name is a way that he feels seen and acknowledged and important in this family, where he is literally of lower rank than his wife. But it's just coming across to me like retrograde whining, despite the fact that I think this historical point COULD have been framed in a more sympathetic way. Philip's childhood was a very nomadic and lonely one, but the show has only covered that in throw-away lines. They way it is attempting to illustrate Philip's attachment to Clarence House -- he says several times that it's the only home he's ever known -- is done mostly by impressing how much work he's done to redecorate it. They have barely lived at Clarence House at all. I have sympathy for a man who feels overshadowed -- wait, scratch that. I do not have sympathy for a man who feels overshadowed by his wife and never have. Women NEVER get the narrative that we should feel bad for them because their husbands are so awesome. To be more clear: I understand, given the time period in which this show is set, why Phil would feel weird about his place as the so-called traditional head of the family, when his wife is the Queen. I think you could create sympathy in the modern audience by hitting harder what a shitty and lonely, family-less life he had up to this point, and why he might be so attached to the idea of making his own traditional family. The Crown is not really doing that.
The Hallway
It IS, however, really giving us some GREAT GREAT hallways.
The AWKWARD
Edward's tea with QE2, The Queen Mum, and Margaret is about as awkward as Thanksgiving is about to be for many Americans this year. In short: VERY. The Queen Mum is both wearing a LITERAL FOX'S HEAD going down her back and she is FULL OF RAAAAGE toward "the monsterously selfish" "leech" Edward, and Wallis, who she calls both "a witch" and "that Jezebel divorcee." That sentence turned into, like, the meanest Zagat review ever.
The Wallpaper
Speaking of that Jezebel, I have to give a shoutout to Wallis's bedroom, because it's glorious and I wish this shot were lighter so you could see it better. Wallis also terribly irked that she wasn't invited to the funeral. Shove it, Wallis. (Although Wallis Simpson did provide me and Heather with one of our favorite quotes in The Royal We: "You have no idea how hard it is to live out a great romance." Thanks for that, and also you had good taste in jewelry, but otherwise, shove it.) Edward writes her some SCATHINGLY BITCHY letters, in which he is AWFUL about everyone in his family AND England as a concept. "What a bunch of ice-veined monsters my family are," he writes. "How cold and thin-lipped, and dumpy and plain, and joyless and loveless." Ummmmm, did he forget he's back for A FUNERAL?? How joyful did you expect it to be, friend? He then basically breaks an arm congratulating himself for not letting the Queen Mum "have it with both barrels" -- for being rude to him? YOU WERE THE ONE WHO ABDICATED, DUDE. People are allowed to think you're a selfish prick. Also that thing where you were kinda into the Nazis -- so they can continue to cash out as "revenge for the insult" of Wallis not getting invited to the funeral. They're the worst.
The Funeral
This funeral segment was beautifully shot, with everyone in highly dramatic veils. That said, it was also a bit confusing, because this appears to be George VI's laying in state at Westminster Abbey, but the man himself was buried at Windsor Castle four days later, which we see in the next scene. I get why they're not going to explain that logistically, exactly, but it was a bit of a bending of the facts that I thought deserved a ping. Overall, this show is sort of vague about where we are in time at any given moment.
The Pomp and Circumstance
And this was an interesting moment, where the Lord Chamberlain -- the senior officer of the royal household, who per Wiki is "is responsible for organising ceremonial activities including state visits, investitures, garden parties, the State Opening of Parliament, weddings and funerals" -- broke a white stick over the coffin and threw it into the grave. It is "the white stave of office" and breaking it symbolizes the end of his service to the departed monarch. That's intriguing because it's less about the king than the Lord Chamberlain. Anyway, that info and more is available quick and dirty on a whole Wiki page about state funeral protocol.
The Mountbatten Residence
HIDEOUS. FYI, over at the Mountbatten Country House, there's a party afoot (which is pretty unseemly considering how recently the king was buried). This house is called Broadlands, and has its own Wikipedia page and it is interesting. (When we were writing The Royal We, Heather and I once spent a whole afternoon picking out a country home to give to Prince Richard [the Charles figure, more or less] because we wanted to use a real one, and it turns out I can happily spend hours reading about houses.)
The Dining Room
Not too shabby inside, either. And this is where Lord Mountbatten gets all delighted by the fact that THE FUTURE KING SHALL BE A MOUNTBATTEN!!!! and raises a literal toast to "The Royal House Mountbatten."
The German
Guess who isn't so thrilled about THAT little declaration? Our German friend Ernst of Hanover, who is a cousin of the royals and who is like, "uh, say what now?" (His Wiki is mostly interesting because it taught me that his wife was named Princess Ortrud of Schleswig-Holstein-Sonderburg-Glücksburg, which is a mouthful, if we're talking about last names.)
The Gardens
In case you're wondering, the gardens at Clarence House are looking lovely here. (I assume they are lovely in real life; I haven't gotten over to that one.)
The Tattletale
So, while Phil is being mean to Charles about Charles's disinterest in sports (Charles eventually gets his back by kicking a ball right into Phil's solar plexus), Ernst goes over to tell Mary of Teck about this Royal House of Mountbatten thing and she's like, "I have DOUBTS about this and also look again at my gallery wall." Lord Mountbatten seems like an over-reacher to me.
The Dinner
I might love Ernst.
The Margaret
Speaking of love, Peter Townsend's wife has left him and he's sort of half-heartedly non-committal about it all, and Margaret is like, "NOW WE CAN GET MARRIED. You know. Eventually." And he's kinda like, "hmmm," and I can't tell if I am supposed to be rooting for them or not? My feeling is that this is a much better story if they are LONGING FOR EACH OTHER and madly in love and a meeting of true souls, but we spend hardly any time with them, and also they seem to have the chemistry of a washing machine and an overripe banana. So I'm not sure this plot is totally hanging together yet. This show assumes a level of knowledge about the British royal family, I think, which a lot of viewers might not have and they needed to invest a little more in this plotline.
The Drawing Room
I just really like a classic cozy English drawing room. It's got so many throw pillows!
The Ladies Maid
This also marks two scenes in three episodes where A HUMAN PERSON is dressing and undressing the Queen and no one else in the room even acknowledges her or acts like she is there. Downton Abbey taught me that one's lady's maid needs to be trusted and treasured, because you might need her to help you hide a body/secret away your diaphragm.
The Deal
So, basically Edward tells Churchill that Churchill was always super supportive of him abdicating -- wasn't this because Churchill thought he'd be a shitty king who might love Hitler? That's how I always read it, but Churchill does NOT pipe up to note this -- and says that HE'LL talk Elizabeth into dropping the last name thing and moving into Buckingham Palace if Churchill gets him his allowance and Wallis her HRH. The former, I think he did get. The latter: Not so much.
The Makeout
Just want to note that these two are apparently concerned about being found out, but are TERRIBLE SECRET KEEPERS as the door is open here AND they have lots of convos wherein the shades in front of Townsend's window are open. Margaret's dress is lovely here, however, even if I am beginning to think she's in love with a wishy-washy person, and you can't really see it. JUST TRUST ME.
The Jewels
Because NECKLACES. Having said that, this show is also bad at noting where people are going and what they're doing there, and it makes it hard for me to track the passage of time. I believe this is at the opera? The jist of the scene is that she's sad and Phil is nice to her, but...where and when are we? It's not huge that we don't know -- I don't need everything sign-posted for me -- but it's another example of how the people behind this show forget that not everyone watching are as hip-deep into this time period as they are.
The Breakfast
So, Edward comes over and uses Elizabeth's sad need for a guiding fatherly hand as a way to get her to agree to keep the Windsor family name, and also to move into Buckingham Palace, so he can get his allowance reinstated. (He also gives her an apology for, in effect, ruining her chance at a normal life when he abdicated, although it is an apology she quite literally has to ask him to give her.) Delightfully, this is the look of DOUBT and DISMAY she gives him when he tell her that he and Wallis own pugs. QE2 does NOT care for pugs, it seems. (I'd also like to note that I was mildly annoyed that SHE served HIM his meal. YOU'RE THE QUEEN, LADY. But then I thought about it, and he's older than she is, and a family member, and it would seem natural to defer to him in that manner for her at this point.)
The Sofa
Yes, yes, Phil is still old Cranky McGee that he's given up EVERYTHING to marry Elizabeth and I'm mostly interested in the piano pictures behind him. Move your head, love. You're acting like she wasn't the heir to the throne when you married her, and I tire of you.
The Car Flag
So, they move into Buckingham Palace and I'm mostly including this shot because it has one of Heather's most favorite details, which is that the Queen's standard even flies on her car when she is in residence in said car. Once she gets out of the car, the tiny flag is also run down. Isn't that a fabulous little logistical detail?
The Two Elizabeths
Also fantastic: QE2 giving a speech about The House of Windsor in front of a painting of QE Original Sauce. Well, as Edward pointed out, the female rulers HAVE generally done better than the men. Isn't that the truth?