Sarah Paulson as Marcia Clark

I'm starting off with the Law & Order folks, as I could not resist the urge to lead with Marcia's perm. My thoughts: Sarah Paulson is GREAT in this part, visually and otherwise; I'm worried about Marcia's chain-smoking; we need to talk about how Marcia and Chris Darden later ALLEGEDLY had A LOVE AFFAIR!; you should probably read this great interview on Vulture with the actual Marcia Clark; and being a prosecuting attorney seems really stressful, and yet when I was like 17 years old, I wanted to be one.

Christian Clemenson as Bill Hodgman

One of the things that is SO GOOD about this show is how incredibly right all the sets are. A LOT of it was filmed on location (that I could tell; definitely exteriors), but one of the things that got me about a lot of these interiors is how perfect the light is. The LA sunshine fighting to get into a depressing legal building in downtown LA looks JUST LIKE THIS.

Behind Marcia there are Bill Hodgman, with whom she's prosecuting the case (FOR NOW; he later gets swapped out for Christoper Darden, and I cannot remember how that totally played out, so that's something to look forward to), and a dude who works for the DA, whose name I didn't catch. Don't you think it must be SURREAL for all of these bit players to watch this and be like, "OOH THAT'S ME!" ALSO, I'd like to point out that I remember enough from this case that, when the LAPD are gathering evidence at OJ's Brentwood place, I saw one of the forensics guys and thought, "oh, I remember when that dude testified." And yet I can't remember what I had for lunch.

Bruce Greenwood as Gil Garcetti

Gil Garcetti is a handsome man, but Bruce Greenwood is very flattering casting. Gil also spawned a very VERY handsome son, who is currently our mayor. (And for whom I have some strong words about how I think he needs to get Dodgers management to make a deal to get on TV for Vin Scully's final season, but that's a rant for another piece). I'm sure Gil is thrilled that there's a huge mini-series digging up the greatest failure (arguably) of his terms as DA, but at least he's handsome in it!

The LAPD

I'm sure we'll see more of these three -- and this white Bronco into which they are peering -- but I also wanted to note that Racist Perjurer Mark Fuhrman should be HIGHLY flattered that he's being played by Hot Steven Pasquale, formerly seen making out with Alicia in The Good Wife. He also, anecdotally, was involved with the complete mismanagement of a riot I may or may not have been involved in while I was at UCLA. Fuhrman, I mean. Steven Pasquale was -- AS FAR AS I KNOW -- not involved.

Sterling K Brown as Chris Darden

Sterling K Brown is GREAT casting as Chris Darden, and I am already fascinated to find out how he got out of SID (LAPD's internal affairs investigation department, about which I am v. familiar thanks to having read all of Michael Connelly's Harry Bosch books, which I highly recommend if you like detective novels). Also riveting: his relationship with Johnnie Cochran, which we will get to shortly. Spoiler: COURTNEY B VANCE IS AMAZING.

The Glove

This glove is also turning in a very strong performance in a small but vital role.

Cuba Gooding Jr as OJ Simpson

First off: Cuba is too old for this part. But that aside: he's also VERY VERY good in it, so who cares? It is a delight to see him back in action and I think he's really hitting the "whoa, he might be crazy?" aspect of this role without diving into a place where you're completely sure that he's guilty, regardless of what my optometrist said. I recently had a conversation with someone much younger than I am about this case, and I had to explain to her that, before the murder, OJ was sincerely beloved by everyone who didn't know him personally (as well as some of those people, I'm sure). Even those of us who went to UCLA. He was EXTREMELY charismatic, super talented, loaded, and really, really handsome. And in the days before the internet, any gossip about his temper, or his erratic behavior (for example) wouldn't neccessarily gain traction with the rest of the country. So him being accused of nearly decapitating his ex-wife, and a young waiter, was REALLY shocking.

Billy Magnussen as Kate Kaelin

You guys. Billy Magnussen is SO GOOD in this part. He's so so funny and dim. Someone asked us on Twitter last night if Kato really was that amusingly dumb and the answer is yes. There is a reason this dude became a minor celebrity from this trial. His amusing dimness was RIVETING.

David Schmimmer as Ross Geller as Robert Kardashian (Senior)

You guys, I really thought the Schwim was excellent in this part.

David Schmimmer as Ross Geller as Robert Kardashian (Senior)

And I realized the previous slide neglected to capture the iconic white streak in his hair. There always is a moment where you see Schwimmer and you think "PIVOT!" but I think he's doing a very good job here.

Courtney B Vance as Johnnie Cochran

A) Johnnie's closet is AMAZING and I expected nothing less. He was a sharp-dressed man.

b) Clear off your shelf for your Emmy, Courtney B Vance. I mean, for one thing, CBV can do anything: He is a graduate of Harvard. And also of Yale. He has a Tony. He has been married to Angela Bassett for nearly 20 years of very powerful combined hotness. He is a GREAT ACTOR. But he is also so so so so good in this part, playing a real-life person who was so charismatic that he had a fictional character on Seinfeld based on him. That is a tall order.

Courtney B Vance as Johnnie Cochran

I'm also looking forward to seeing all his ties.

John Travolta as Robert Shapiro and Cheryl Ladd as Mrs Shapiro

Okay, so I know people thought Travolta was chewing the scenery here, but I LOVED IT. I actually thought his performance was more restrained than I had been given cause to believe -- or, more accurately, he seemed completely in control of said scenery-chewing performance. He looks INSANE but, you guys, Robert Shapiro kinda looked like this!

Additionally: Do we think this is supposed to be Kate Mantilini? That floral arrangement could not be more perfect for time and place.

Robert's Shapiro's House

I also needed to point out to you how completely on point this set is, for a Rich Person's House in Los Angeles in 1994. It clearly was freshly decorated in 1989, so it's a bit worn in, but...the foo dog lamps? The lacquer screen? All yes.

Connie Britton as The Morally Corrupt Faye Resnick, Selma Blair as Kris Kardashian

Okay, so...this was also great. (I was highly impressed with this premiere.) Connie -- whom I love -- is also too old to play Faye Resnick, who is familiar to everyone who is currently watching Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, but she (like Cuba) is great, and thus I will allow it, and her ENORMOUS hat.

As for Selma Blair...she looks so much like Kris Jenner here to me. It's exceptional. And I have read some complaints from people who are irritated that Kris Jenner has wormed her way into this show. I understand your feeling. But it's kind of like saying you're annoyed Thomas Jefferson talked his way into Hamilton. Kris Jenner, for once in her life, actually is organically a real part of this historical, true story; she has to be in this. She is a player in this game. And there was no way Ryan Murphy would be able to resist her. I certainly would not take his retweet as an endorsement.

Fug the Show: The People vs OJ Simpson: American Crime Story recap, episode 1

It's hard to know exactly how to recap this show. We all know the story...and yet I need to tell you guys how my optometrist was best friends with Johnnie Cochran, and he swore to me whilst checking me for glaucoma that Johnnie told him that OJ did it. (This is what happens when you live in Los Angeles. Also my optometrist was a lover of tall tales, so take his testimony as such.) Or how we were pretty sure a family friend might be called to testify for the defense (he'd played golf with OJ the morning of the murder, and claims OJ was complaining the entire time that his hands were killing him, thanks to his arthritis. Er, no pun intended. Our theory was that the defense was going to ask him to testify that OJ's hands were too pained and weak to stab anyone. This did not happen). The Slow Speed White Bronco Chase went down literally hours after I drove home from UCLA for summer vacation and my entire family watched it on KTLA (along with the rest of the city). I watched the entire grand jury proceedings (or preliminary hearings?) that summer, as I removed the wallpaper from my mother's bathroom for her. I literally remember, at one point that summer, looking up at the TV -- because, in Los Angeles at least, every minute of this was television -- and noting to the empty den, "oh, Marcia got a hair cut!" For me, the OJ Simpson trial and 105 degree oppressive San Gabriel Valley heat are the major markers of my college-era summers, and -- in short -- I have a lot of thoughts about OJ. If you didn't live in Los Angeles at the time, I cannot over-stress to you how long and wide a shadow this case cast across the city. It was, arguably, the murder of the century, and living through it was deeply compelling, and very sad. I think this show -- and I've only seen the premiere -- is doing a great job telling this very complex story of a terrible murder and a complicated city. Ryan Murphy, sometimes you really get it right. Much as I did for Mad Men, I'm going to recap these by ranking/tackling an aspect of the show each week. This week, it's the physical casting of the major players (so far). But please feel free to comment on the show -- or the case -- as a whole in the comments. (And there are so many more actors to come. NATHAN LANE IS F LEE BAILEY! EVAN HANDLER IS ALAN DERSHOWITZ! I just realized I forgot to get a grab of Theo Huxtable as AC Cowlings, but we'll see him next week, since he's in the white Bronco with OJ as this episode closes.)