Robert Pattinson
I actually dig the idea of this -- someone in Fug Nation wondered to us if he looks like he's in costume as a billiards table, but British racing green is one of my favorite colors EVER so I am biased -- but boy, did he look stiff and uncomfortable in it. Like a peeping Tom stuck in a hedge.
Taylor Lautner
Let's all pour some out for Lautner here. I actually think he's an unsung hero of the franchise who's gotten better and better with each movie (and yes, I've seen them all, because all the screaming in the theater is HILARIOUS), and he was decent on SNL, and I hope he doesn't drop off the face of the planet after this. But in these last two movies, the kid has the WORST ARC in the history of EVER, and had to not only act out the whole "I'm in love with a toddler" thing, but then defend it on press junkets. He has earned his paycheck. And he's still dapper and smiling. You go, good sir.
Jackson Rathbone
I still find this person to be the most hilarious creature on the planet. And it only seems intentional about fifty percent of the time. I am, as someone else in Fug Nation pointed out, gutted that his suit is not made of crushed velvet. But it's striking, if a tad Violet Beauregard in its commitment to blueberry. Further, I pray that his sideburns connect under his chin in some kind of fuzz buckle.
Jackson Rathbone
Teehee.
Jackson Rathbone
Somebody please let HIM play Katie Holmes on SNL.
Rami Malek
Wait, was there a memo about blue?
Joe Anderson
You might recognize Joe from Across The Universe, a.k.a., the Beatles musical movie starring Evan Rachel Wood. But my theory is that Kellan Lutz knows him only as, "The dude who borrowed my favorite brunch outfit." That seems so right to me somehow.
Julian Morris
Julian here is on Pretty Little Liars, as one of the many overage dudes in Rosewood who think it's super cool to hook up with teenagers, because there is not a single eligible lady in that town who is in her twenties. The buttons on that jacket are kind of cool, but I think ... would it have worked better NOT as part of a suit? That fabric is a bit intense for me. I spent a lot of time worrying that it was dark-wash denim.
Edi Gathegi
Handsome. And are those leather lapels? They remind me of a Rag & Bone blazer I'm trying to find on eBay, but which is nowhere in my size. Apparently everyone else had the same thought I did. I HATE that kind of mind meld.
Billy Burke
With apologies to Billy Burke, who is actually pretty good in the movies (as these things go), I can't focus on him because of all the posters in the background. I hope these people finagled school credit for some of those.
Peter Facinelli
Peter here is like, "I let Kelly Taylor have her moment. NOW IT'S MY TURN TO CHOOSE ME."
Goran Visnjic
Hey, check it out -- it's Intern George's stunt double, Goran Visnjic! He is much LESS of a double now that we are many, many years removed from ER -- on which he was, seemingly, hired to be the vaguely Clooney-esque hunk to replace Doug Ross in our loins' loyalties; it pretty well worked. He and Radha Mitchell are apparently in a new ABC show together, and as such, did all the requisite posing this evening together rather than apart. Whatever. Nice to see you, GV. Now please read me a bedtime story.
Robert Pattinson
I just had to let you know that this woman MAXIMIZED HER MOMENT. Boy. She is giving me some truly special holiday gift ideas.