Patrick Wilson
Seriously, look at Arnett, and then look back at this, and... I feel like there's a brother buddy comedy coming, except that it might not end up being very funny.
Katie Holmes
Katie Holmes was askance in every single photo of her from this event. Check out this one: pure Land's End model. This is a cute dress that's styled into a boring mess. Sing this to the tune of Ricky Martin's "She Bangs": "She NABs, she NABs // she's bland and what's more // she NBS, she NBS..." The latter being, of course, Needs Better Shoes. And let's be honest, she's not trying at all here, right? I would say she gives two specks of a damn, at most. Part of me finds this super charming -- she's the ex-Mrs. Tom Cruise but she's dressed like a girl who never left The WB Network -- and part of me finds this insane, because she's the ex-Mrs. Tom Cruise, and if that were me, I'd make sure I looked SO GOOD all the time, so that at least people would be into my fashion while I struggled to make my career happen again.
Jess Weixler
I'm going to allow her the white pump, because I think it plays smartly off the white hem of this dress. Which is, let's face it, a really strange cut, but I'm going to give it to her because I think it looks smashing on her.
Patricia Clarkson
Sigh. She is Patricia Clarkson, and I am not. Which is fine, but when I become the age she is currently, I will be really super bummed that I'm not Patricia Clarkson.
Jamie Chung
I like this dress well enough. Every time I stumble across Jamie Chung, I have to re-Google her, and rediscover that she was Mulan in "Once Upon A Time" (which I don't watch) and that she's in the new "Sin City" movie and that she was on the Real World. The ONLY thing I can remember about her is that she's dating Bryan Greenberg, whom I'm sure we ALL remember as That Guy Who Was On One Tree Hill For A While Who Was Not Nathan or Chad Michael Murray or Mouth or Skills or Hot Robert Buckley.
Carla Gugino
Great dress -- fits like a glove, but could use some accessories, although FELICITATIONS on not defaulting to a nude shoe, Carla. Every time I stumble across Carla Gugino, I think, "Sweet lord, she looks so good. Remember that Pauly Shore movie that's secretly kind of funny? Remember Pauly Shore? Do you think SHE remembers Pauly Shore?"
Gina Gershon
This face says, "Yeeeeeah, you know you're going to watch me play Donatella Versace this weekend. Don't deny it." And I won't. Because I can't.
Kid Cudi
Those shoes are ridiculous. They look like a children's television show about, like, a moose who does a lot of crafting.
Katrina Bowden
Zzz.
Katrina Bowden
Except for her shoes, which look like high-heeled reptilian Isotoner slippers. Those aren't zzz, they're EEEEEEEEEK.