Brody Jenner

Guess who's joining the cast of Keeping Up With the Kardashians? I had a secret and unspoken fondness for Brody Jenner until the night I saw him at the front row of a fashion show -- well, a "fashion" show, given that it was Avril Lavigne's line -- CHEWING GUM AND DRINKING WINE AT THE SAME TIME. Also, this. Our forbidden love is dead.

JEAH!

I miss Nathan Adrian. The dude behind Lochte here is VERY approving of this look, I think -- I am not sure that it totally fits? Keep on keeping on, though, Ryan.

Giuliana Rancic

Wow, could the crowd look any LESS enthused about Giuliana? We're pretty rough on her here sometimes, but I actually think she looks very polished and pretty here, and I continue to really, really like this hair on her.

Kris Jenner

One day, we'll learn that Kris Jenner is actually an emissary of Satan himself sent to earth to torment us all -- no one more than her own children. Also, I liked this better on one of the 5340 other celebs who've already worn it.

Kelly Osbourne

I think this is actually really cute on Kelly.

Chelsea Handler

Chelsea is not my cup of tea, but -- while I have my doubts about that shirt, possibly -- she wears this suit well.

Kourtney Kardashian

This isn't terrible, but she looks tired. TIRED OF KRIS. (Sorry, apparently I really am not into Kris Jenner today. Perhaps because I saw a rerun of KUWTK at the gym where she basically told Khloe that she was too fat to be good for business. I don't care for that kind of behavior.)

Joel McHale

Because I care about those of you who are warm for Joel McHale's form.

JoBro and Mrs JoBro

These two got tan at Coachella! I do not know what the Jonii is wearing, but I appreciate the effort to look different but still event-appropriate.

Ryan Seacrest

Ryan, shouldn't you be interviewing someone? Or being mean to Giuliana off in the corner somewhere? Do you even know what to do with yourself when you don't have a mic in your hand? (I kid because I love: all of us who saw this year's SAGs know that when Ryan isn't driving the ship, the ship CRASHES INTO THE ROCKS AND BURSTS INTO FLAMES. Seriously, never leave us, Seacrest.)

Catt Sadler

That dude behind her has NOTES.

Kim Kardashian

I blame Kris.

Fugs and Fabs: The E! Upfront

So, they had a red carpet -- complete with fans! -- at the E! upfronts, and yet Giuliana and Seacrest were walking the carpet rather than working it. I can't deal with that level of self-reflexiveness. [Photo: Getty and WENN]