Kerry Washington in Ulyana Sergeenko
This is from the same line as Zendaya's from the Kids Choice Awards. I think it is much more successful, although the bra top STILL somehow manages to... I don't know if it minimizes the boob size, or relocates them weirdly, or just draws too much attention to how they're supported. There's something off about it. Mostly, this is nice, though.
Unlike her storylines. Because Jake is engaged now, see, so after he essentially (pardon the graphicness) "seduced her" when she tried to dump him by finger-raping her while telling her how hot she is for him and how she knows how good this feels and that's why they'll never stop sleeping together, he is also engaged to someone else, because I guess they're now treating their attraction like a PTSD kind of bond between broken people. And Olivia is jealous. And therein lies the central problem with this show: Nobody has any clue what, or who, Olivia wants. For a long time, it was clear she just wanted Fitz. Then she got him, then they had to break that up I guess, so they twisted everyone into weird behaviors and she got out of there and went BACK to Jake because God forbid they hire new love interests anymore. She sometimes seems to miss Fitz even though they ended ugly, and now she's jealous of Jake's fiance, even though she picked Fitz AND SHE KNOWS JAKE KILLED SOMEONE TO GET THE NSA CHIEF JOB. Which he got. And he's living with her father. Who has her convinced, at least partially, that he's not scheming anymore. So what does she want? Where does she go from here? I cannot believe she actually wants Jake, so... figure this shit out, Scandal, because you're making mincemeat of your lead.
Darby Stanchfield
Abby is turning into Junior Cyrus, I think. She wants to run the White House. She also had this awkward moment where she had to point out to Fitz that if he's going to have Single President Sex, they have to make exit plans and prepare non-disclosure agreements and protect against kidnapped bodily fluids and photographs and yada yada yada. She's his new babysitter. And kind of his pimp, because there was one ep I watched with half an eye where it SEEMED like they were trying to sate his sexual needs by parading through any staffer who was young and halfway attractive, because they knew these women would sign all the papers and then Fitz could pork himself silly. Gross. I hate everyone.
This outfit is also INSANE and looks like the textiles section at Z Gallerie.
Scott Foley
Jake murdered, got Fitz to give him a fancy government job, and is back in Papa Pope's pocket. His goodness is, as ever, murky. I think Papa Pope convinced him that there are bigger bads out there and that they're all stronger together, but that might just be me ascribing sense to the nonsensical. (There's also some big thing now where Papa Pope took in Jake when he was a kid, and he's like a son to Papa Pope, which feels AWFULLY REVISIONIST but whatever.) Jake is, essentially, still way too certain that he's hot shit. DISLIKE.
Bellamy Young
This is the best Bellamy has looked in a long time.
Mellie wrote a book about her time as First Lady, and Fitz's affairs, and why she stayed. She went to Olivia to get help busting through the writer's block, and the two had a drunken night sipping Mellie's moonshine out of jars and talking about that period in their lives. It was a good scene, actually. She's pretty sure she can run for president despite only half an hour in the Senate. GOOD LUCK. She also spurned Cyrus's offer to help her campaign because she's got someone else in mind. (Olivia?) And she upsets him when she says of Fitz, "We made a president," and he sputters, "WE?!?!" Yes, "we," you jackwagon. You know this show is messed up when a woman who has been horrible and selfish, and who faked a miscarriage to get useful press, is now the rootable person on the show.
AND FINALLY: The look of revulsion on her face when she brought Forgotten Baby to visit Fitz, and a hot young staffer came tumbling out of the bathroom in a robe, was epic.
Portia de Rossi
The top half of this could have been pretty, but it comes off like an accident.
Elizabeth North is screwing David Rosen. Mostly out of convenience, but she also likes that he's so excited to get some from her that he's turned into her lapdog. She particularly enjoys that Susan Ross, Greatest Human On The Show, is in love with David and has instructed him to woo her -- and even bang her; she has NO PROBLEM with him prostituting himself -- to convince her to run so that Liz can "make a president."
Josh Malina
No, Josh. NO. You cannot just winsomely point your way back into my good graces. Susan Ross is the only ACTUAL good person anywhere nearby, DAVID ROSEN KNOWS THIS and has even said it out loud, and yet he's still manipulating her. I assume he will realize his feelings for her are real, and then E. North will resort to blackmailing him to keep doing her bidding because she realizes Susan matters to him. Still. YOU ARE BEING A DINK. STOP IT. STOP DINKING.
Fitz
Sigh. They hired Annabeth Gish to play a reporter doing a profile on him, and two seconds into her interview, she has to turn off the tape recorder because her vagina is fluttering. For real. She has a crush on him, she admits it, and he's like, "How about we forget the article and go to dinner," and VOILA, a competent female in her profession has been brought to her knees by the mighty Fitzgerald Pants. GROSS.
Jeff Perry
Cyrus has ID'd another hot young candidate, Pennsylvania's first Hispanic governor, played by Ricardo Chavira of Desperate Housewives. He's really idealistic and likable and good-looking, but his daughter is dying and he's keeping that a secret. Cyrus convinces him to run anyway.
Also, in all this, it's revealed that Cyrus and Secret Service Tom are in cahoots; it might even be implied that they're sleeping together? Or just... Tom is showering at Cyrus's house and wandering around in a towel. Anyway, the two of them bribe a totally innocent dude into charging Ricardo Chavira's HQ with a gun and then making sure Chavira got his hero moment saving the day, so that he'd be a public favorite. SNEAKY, Cyrus. He might be doing this for the wrong reasons -- he's bitter that Fitz is freezing him out and doesn't care about being a good president anymore in his final days, like, WHEN DID HE EVER, CYRUS -- but he's maybe found the right guy.
Katie Lowes
She remains endearingly hopeless at clothes. It's okay, Katie. I would be too. It's much easier from where I sit.
Quinn and Charlie are getting all domestic on the show, and... that's about it. She's still essentially pointless, and they just need bodies at OPA. It's too bad.
Cornelius Smith, Jr.
He actually has MORALS, which is nice. They had to bat cleanup for the White House on something and he was like, "Ew," although he did it. Dude, you've seen how these people work. You cannot be disgusted or surprised at this point.
Also, I could not figure out why I knew him, until I just read somewhere that he was Angie and Jesse's son Frankie on All My Children, and OF COURSE HE WAS. THANK YOU. I don't know why I didn't IMDb him, but there you have it. He needs a storyline, guys. Give it to him.
Guillermo Diaz
Huck still has a job. His family moved away. His family wins.
Betsy Beers
This is Shondaland's Alexander Hamilton -- her Right Hand Man -- and I love how she looks in this. Those pants are GREAT, and they are hemmed properly, which is beyond 95 percent of Hollywood. WHAT IS YOUR SECRET, BETSY?
Shonda Rhimes
She looks GREAT. I love how bright this is.
Joe Morton
"THEY WILL NEVER GET RID OF ME. ALL THIS WILL BE MINE. MIIIIIINE!"