Ryan Kwanten
UM. WHAT. IS. HAPPENING. Is this...leather? No. No, it can't be. IT WON'T BE.
Jessica Pare
I think this is very pretty, and I'm pretending that it's not also a little nipply.
Kerry Washington
I love the fuzzy people in the background, all of whom are holding iPhones up to their faces. Kerry here looks...fine. I appreciate her willingness to try new things, but I feel like part of her problem is that her wardrobe rarely lives up to the promise of her face.
Anna Wintour
She's going to have me killed for speaking this aloud, but I feel like this whole look is a little OLD on ol' A Dubs.
Kate Mara
I love the bag, but I am making the same unimpressed face that Constance Zimmer (in red) is making in the background of this pic. Can we blame this on Rooney?
Gabby Douglas
She always looks totally cute and also gets invited EVERYWHERE. It's a sweet gig, being the reigning Olympic all-around champion.
Robin Wright
In which I make the executive decision that navy is a neutral rather than a color (arguable, I know, and I generally would actually be arguing with me about this). It must be so very sweet for Robin Wright that SHE got invited to Nerd Prom and Sean "I'm Just Back from Haiti" Penn did not. It probably makes up for the fact that her dress looks a bit as if someone had taken a bite from it.
Morena Baccarin
OF COURSE she looks a mess and has done something weird with her boobs. Morena Baccarin, you are so stunning and you always want to wear something that gets all wacktacular on your boobs. Stop doing that.
Amy Poehler
I always appreciate it when she does this sort of vaguely 30s look. It feels in keeping with her being a sharp and saucy dame.
Kevin McHale
Speaking of looking sharp, nicely played, dude. Keep it up, and you will not be fighting the Biebs for next year's Fug Madness crown.
Carol Alt
It's nice to know that Noted Kook Carol Alt can turn the Kookiness down to a nice level 4 when the occasion requires -- even if that calls for turning the boobs up to a 9. I MIGHT see part of a nipple? Let's just pretend that never happened.
Joanna Coles and Natalie Dormer
Joanna Coles looks like the classy dame that she is; I covet Dormer's ring, but wonder if she will ever stop making that face in pictures.
Sharon Stone
WHAT. YES.
If Natalie Dormer is ON Game of Thrones, Sharon Stone here is dressing like she THINKS she's living it.
Julie Bowen
I feel like this is so much better in theory than in practice, much like the time I decided to join a gym.
Olivia Munn
I will begrudgingly admit that while I am not in love with that updo, she looks very pretty in this.
Sophia Bush
a) No. b) I know Bush here has some pet charities of which she seems very publicly supportive, which is great, but she seems like a rather...how can I be kind about this? Let me just say that her level of celebrity does not seem commensurate with a big-deal event at the White House, so her PR person should get a raise for that, while at the same time getting a demotion for the fact that I have no idea what her aforementioned charities actually are.
Kate Walsh
Okay, I'm even MORE confused about why Kate Walsh is at this event. Was there just a TON of White House Corresponding in the last two episodes of Private Practice, that I forgot to watch? Also, that pattern is so SO close, but ultimately kind of reminds me of the pattern on a perfume box.
Patricia Arquette
Presented without comment other than: Sweet Jesus.