Carrie Underwood
Actually, I applaud Carrie for this. When she first took the stage and I saw this gown, I was totally bored and underwhelmed by its massive bridalness, and I stopped watching. Then she turned it into a video wall, and I couldn't NOT look at her, and nobody else could either. THAT is how you make sure you're the center of attention.
Carrie Underwood
"First, there were stars. MILLIONS of balls of light that group together to form images of things like housewares, and accessories."
Carrie Underwood
"And then the SMOKE MONSTER came, and it crashed planes onto islands and built hatches in the ground and filled them with classic books and records."
Carrie Underwood
"And then the smoke creature rose up and got super, super confused about what the hell was going on and it kind of twisted around on itself and then couldn't figure out how to get back on track and then waited for the big network executive in the sky to give it an excuse to leave."
Carrie Underwood
"And then the plague of butterflies came and brought scary things like Silence of the Lambs and Cocoon, as well as probably a lot of people's tattoos and maybe Drew Barrymore's aura."
Carrie Underwood
"But THEN. Mankind arrived and built some daily essentials like jewelry shops and crazy expensive hotels with ornate ceilings."
Carrie Underwood
"And then creativity bloomed and Kevin Spacey put rose petals on that naked girl with his MIND and The Bachelor showed us what love is and pollen taught people all about allergies and mankind reached its peak."
The 55th Annual GRAMMY Awards - Show
"And then the darkness came. Although I have another Grammy to light up my hallways so I'm probably going to be fine. Good luck to the rest of you, though. Thank you and goodnight!"