Rihanna
This is an Alaia, and as many astute Fug Nationals Tweeted to us, she shares a love of that designer's red garments with one Cher Horowitz. But seriously, from this angle... I mean, it's stunning. Her hair, even ombre, looks fabulous. Her face looks amazing. Everything is coming up roses. UNTIL.
Lord Voldemort
My head is playing the Imperial Death March over and over again. Look, I get that it's her business, I do. But I hate that it's ACKNOWLEDGED and PROVEN that he did the crimes, and somehow he managed to avoid doing the time -- emotionally, anyway. He still does stupid, ragey stuff all over town, and he never actually showed remorse for what happened to her, nor especially took responsibility for it. That's really what bothers me the most. It's not that people can't change; it's that he's shown no indications that he has, nor that he felt he ought to, and she took him back anyway. It makes me sad. So I apologize for the fact that a hundred people are going to pop up in the comments and say that I'm old and judgmental and wrong and a jerk, and that I need to get over it and get a life, and you're entitled to that opinion, but I don't think I need to defend thinking that he's Bad Idea Jeans.
Rihanna
Let's get back to it. I wish I liked the bodice of this dress better, is the thing. Her waist looks tiny and her abs look impressive, but I wish it were lined better around her chest. Because the color is FANTASTIC on her.
Rihanna
However, CBS may blow a whistle and note that they specifically requested no nipple, and it's possible you can see JUST a smidge of hers. That just feels like a minor offsides penalty, though. Nothing egregious; just a little accidental movement.
Rihanna
Okay, if you're a jeweller loaning someone hundreds of thousands in baubles, are you really that comfortable with someone wearing a ring there? Wouldn't you worry that sucker would fly off into the toilet?
Rihanna
She looked great during her performance, too, even with another touch of accidental nip. In my head, all these things are intentional as a way of, again, honoring the letter of the law but not its hilarious spirit.
Rihanna
Here's the other thing: Rihanna looked good eough that even though I don't like this outfit, I am STILL not mad at her for it. The other thing is, there seemed to be threat of underboob, but I think actually it was just shadows and then some of her tattoos. Regardless... I was kind of back in on Rihanna after this spate of performances, because she sounded FANTASTIC and looked lovely, and then I got sad all over again because I'm worried her boyfriend is still a douche. Sigh. As we used to say: NOMB. As in, none of my business. Except it's so awkward when he won't stand up for a Frank Ocean standing ovation (juvenile) and they drizzle themselves all over each other on an anniversary of a really, really awful event (le sigh) and I keep waiting for Jay Z -- Rihanna's AND Frank Ocean's mentor -- to fold him up like a card table and shove him between the wall and his garage fridge. Which Beyonce is not going to like.