Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Let's start with something pretty. That bodice has a HUGE margin of error. But if it's on the right person, who can wrangle everything to perfection -- think Jaimie Alexander in her Globes dress -- then it could be really, really stunning.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
The work that went into this is lovely, but the overall silhouette -- and that snore of a color -- leaves me cold.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
This model is thinking, "I hope we don't get paid in clothes."
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
This is nutty. I can't decide if she looks like an elaborate fish, or a woman with hand fans on her shoulders. I'm almost surprised Karl didn't ship it over for last year's Met Gala.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
This has a Lady Mary/Gatsby feel. I cannot say that it's flattering, or that I will be happy with Julianne Moore when she wears it and it eats her figure alive, but it's funky on the runway.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
If you stare at this long enough, a 3D image of truffled mac and cheese appears.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Kendall Jenner got the simplest dress. I wonder if the other models side-eyed that -- not that it's Kendall specifically; just that I wonder if in any situation, whoever gets the most commercially comprehensible gown gets treated like a teacher's pet. I'd be shocked if this didn't make out out into the world.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
This feels like a hybrid of Chanel and Valentino, in a "Reign" kind of way.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
I might want to slice off the sleeves and make the belt go around only once.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Insane. But also fun to look at, again.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
And then we have Frumpy Nutballs.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
"Why would anyone do this to this fabric?" she is thinking. "OR TO ME?!?"
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Matching hip clutches are Karl's vision for the future, apparently.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
I will say this for Karl: Even the stuff i don't like looks as if it has a really cool texture. I want to touch all of it, particularly that skirt, even though I do NOT want to wear it.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
This handmaiden is in secret clown training.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
I could see this on Emma Roberts. I might not even hate it if the gold halter portion were removed.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Karl was feeling nostalgic for shag carpet on this day.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Karl has a lot to answer for, sometimes.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
This is the kind of thing a VERY WEALTHY woman buys so she can be buried in it.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
With the amount people embraced those afoul Givenchy PJs, I fully expect to see this on Gwyneth.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
These really do look more like stuff he's making for a movie than anything for the real world. I DO think it wouldn't be the worst idea if he DID costume a movie...
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
This is a VERY expensive apron.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
It's such an easy chop! The sleeves, Jim! The sleeves!
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Someone HAS to have put Diane Kruger's name inside on the tag.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
And then suddenly we're at the Hudson Street Orphanage.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
It is such a hard-knock life sometimes.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Man. It's like he fed the blouse some spinach and it went full Popeye.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Chanel Maternity.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Could be worse.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
See what I mean? THIS is worse. This is Gigi Hadid's sister Bella, who feels... like a tangent I am not sure we needed to go on. She once released a statement that she and The Weeknd were "taking a break" and I thought, "Did anyone know you were even dating?" ANYHOO. It's her first Chanel show as a model, and Karl celebrated it by hanging bunches of shrimp across her chest.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Lindsey Wixon needs to be made up a lot more carefully than this. Her face is getting stepped on by all that stuff. Her DRESS, with the proper support, could be very pretty on someone, though.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Someone will probably wear this. It seems JUST sedate enough. But I can't put my finger on who it'll be.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Well. How can she eat passed apps with those sleeves? The food will get all over them.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Gigi Hadid ALSO got a heinous outfit. The cape would be entertaining enough, but NONE of the rest even fits. Maybe Karl didn't appreciate being asked to give Bella a shot. (I'm being hard on Bella. Sorry, Bella. I just feel like we're staring down the barrel at duo that wants so badly to break off a piece of what the Kardashians have, and I just kind of want everyone to sit down and take a break from all that.)
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
You know, we don't HAVE to have a cape moment, Karl. Not if they aren't GOOD capes.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
Professor Trelawney looked SO glamorous at the Hogwarts Staff Ball.
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I can't even tell what's holding up the dress underneath that bomber jacket. It's distracting me from the actual jacket.
Haute Couture Week: Chanel Spring/Summer 2016
I seriously feel like Vanessa Hudgens would wear this for her wedding. Now I kind of hope that happens. AT Coachella.