Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
Again, I love the basic stripey dress under here, but am really not enamored of putting Colorforms all over it.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
LA LA LA WE KNOW. Don't ruin a perfectly adorable navy and white stripe!
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
Pisa: It's Everywhere You Want To Be.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
Well. Perhaps I spoke too soon. This is like if D&G designed a new nightshirt for Grandpa Joe to wear to Willy Wonka's place.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
Is that man punting right up her OH NEVER MIND.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
That purse, though.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
STOP SNEEZING YOUR FREAKING WHIMSY EVERYWHERE.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
I want you to know... that I will NEVER want that wagon wheel coffee table.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
That is so cheerful, though, and when someone wears it to a photocall in London and stands across the Thames from the London Eye, we will cheer.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
And when someone wears this to a May Day orgy, we will... hopefully not be there to bear witness.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
And when someone wears this to Miss Bed In A Bag 2015, we will -- as now -- wish it were a more contemporary-feeling design.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
And when Heidi Klum wears this anyplace, Satan will finally be able to see his breath, as Hell will have frozen solid. (In case you can't tell: That means I basically like this.)
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
I just have the worst feeling Zendaya won't be able to resist this.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
That is actually charming enough, and could work on the right person. But WHY was the directive to have models take selfies on the runway? D&G shouldn't need a gimmick.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
For when we have our Lanai Cheesecake Bash in thirty years.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
Is North West designing handbags for them now?
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
Wait. Is that a wreath of HEADPHONE flowers?
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
I only accept this as a jacket in the sense that it's jacking with my eyeballs.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
Ugh. AGAIN.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
BORING.
[Please check out The Pierces' song "Boring" to know how I am saying that in my head. We heard that first at a fashion show -- BCBG, in fact, or Max Azria, back when his eponymous line still existed -- and I thought she was saying "BOWLING" for a long time, which was weirdly thrilling. Also, for years this was the ringtone whenever Jessica called me (now it's the end of the old New Girl theme song, obvs).]
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
But then THIS is kind of good, right?
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
I actually might also like this. As-is, on Cate Blanchett, but on most other people it'd need to be altered to be slightly less aggressive.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
I am buying this for Martha Stewart. (She clearly needs the donation.)
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
Inspired by someone's kitchen tile. It's actually beautiful in a lot of ways, but also SO MUCH to try and carry off. (And sheery. Always freakin' sheery.)
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
D&G were like, "Okay, Miley Cyrus for Jeremy Scott, WE SEE YOU and we'll raise you a bigger budget and less weed."
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
I can't with the sheer ankle socks.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
It's... the goddess of crafting?
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
Those shoes are a junk drawer come to life.
Dolce & Gabbana - Runway - Milan Fashion Week SS16
"#tbt to three minutes ago when I was like WTF AM I EVEN WEARING CLOTHES FROM THIS SAME LINE WHAT AM I DOING HERE."