Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

This looks like the worst Wild West accident. I want to challenge it to a duel at dawn, and I WILL cheat and turn around and shoot on the count of two.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

Even perhaps just showing the cape fully atop her shoulders would have helped this, but instead it just looks a little costumey and cheap. The ODLR woman doesn't chase after matadors in this way. Matadors chase after the ODLR woman.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

ODLR and Desperately Seeking Susan: Never the twain should meet.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

Yep, I still don't support the twain meeting. Please let's keep the twain separate so that they don't wrestle in this manner.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

I see where this is going, but it still feels like another line.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

And what is this? Refried Givenchy? This is an unenviable task, truly. But I think we need a slower transition from the ODLR yore into whatever Copping wants it to be. We may not like the destination, but I also think he's wrong to try and take us there so fast.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

This isn't my favorite, but I still think it's a better bridge from the past to the potential future. It's a gentler transition than the black lace bibs.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

Let's take a deep breath and inhale something beautiful to calm us down. Ahhhhhh. This is more like it. This is kicking off your shoes after a long day of walking. Or using the bathroom after you forgot to do it at the restaurant and then you got stuck in traffic on the way home.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

This is some hanky-panky right here, and I do mean "hanky" in the actual "handkerchief" sense.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

This reminds me of that black and red Gucci collection, with a hint of Valentino.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

This could look nice, fitted properly. Right? I still think it's much heavier than what I associate with this line, though.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

Ugh, but this lacks finesse.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

Oh, mercy, this grievous patchwork is like a slap in the retinas.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

Elbow hose! Nope.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

It's better than the first slide, but it's ... It's the ODLR dress I would, under his stewardship, decline to download from the collection because we only have so many images we can use and there would be so many dreamier choices.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

What you don't know is that there is a tiny mouse in there holding up the skirt. Its tiny mouse hands will get so TIRED but there is cheese waiting for it at the end.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

HMMMMMM. Ack.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

Why so bandaged?

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

I guess? Is this okay, or is it Stockholm Syndrome?

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

And this might be pandering.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

This fabric is quite sweet, even if I don't like the draping of it exactly. These things happen. This feels like it's at least on-brand -- but what the hell does it have to do with half of what's come down the runway?

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

If you pull a string on her back, the skirt lifts.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

Posh daytime wear is a staple of Oscar, even if this feels too basic.

Oscar De La Renta: Spring/Summer 2016 Runway at New York Fashion Week

And this is at least ending on a happier note. I'm missing any sense of cohesion here. I feel like I can see him straddling what his instants are with what the ODLR brand is, but in a way where his legs are visibly shaking from the effort and periodically he gives up and stands on his side of the chasm for a while just to rest his quads.

High Fugshion: Oscar de la Renta, S/S 2016, at New York Fashion Week

This is Peter Copping's second show since taking over for the master. While I understand that Peter Copping can't live his life trying to recreate OdlR -- and will probably suffer from having to design in his shadow -- the collection lacks unity, and that first slide might be well nigh unforgivable to me. Oscar de la Renta didn't bat a thousand (nobody does), but he knew how to create a sophisticated, transportive, elegant experience -- the Fashion Show equivalent of a bottle of bubbly, some perfect strawberries, and a suite at the Plaza. He peddled a lifestyle, but one it was a pleasure to envy; it would never be mine, but it was enough to know it existed. There is a paucity of that here. To be fair, this isn't the complete show -- for that, drop by Vogue, I guess, since it ate Style.com -- but dive in and see if you agree. [Photos: Getty]