Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
The reception to this collection was... lukewarm. I think nearly all of NYFW was on the middling side, honestly -- AGAIN; London seems to be where the innovation is -- but this just seems totally out of left field. Here's the thing: Reem Acra is mostly known for red carpet looks. So if you're not doing street fashion, you don't diffuse it down to the department store level, AND you're not making actual wearable red-carpet anything, then... what's left? I don't understand.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
There was a time at NYFW -- only a few years ago actually -- when Barbie had fashion shows. This must have walked out of one of them. It belongs in an episode of "The Carrie Diaries" and nowhere else.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
I'm sure this model is thrilled.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
This is the most reasonable outfit you will see.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
AND THIS IS BLOOMERS. I promise. I watched them walk past me and thought, "AYE, MEHEARTY, FUG NATION WILL SEND YE DOWN THE PLANK." I think in Pirate sometimes.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
The colors are vibrant? These looked even more inexpensive in person, though.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
Sigh.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
Doesn't this feel pointless? WHO IS GOING TO WEAR THESE? Who are her clients? I understand that she was trying to fold in global cultural references, but there are graceful and elegant ways to do that, and then there are Forever 21 ways to do that.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
This is the OTHER most reasonable one. AND IT'S BASICALLY MYLAR.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
Line it and we'll talk.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
The runway model is thinking, "I hope I didn't agree to let her pay me in clothes."
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
When we first saw this, from our row, you could only see the top half. Jess said, "Well, that one might turn out reasonable." And then it came into full view and IT'S GOT HAREM PANTS.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
This also feels like she might think she's designing for dolls to be sold at Epcot Center.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
This is... also acceptable? Ish? ISH.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
This show should've been set to "It's A Small World After All."
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
"It's a world of laughter, a world of tears." TRUTH.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
"Its a world of hope and a world of fears." Also true. And, why isn't anyone discussing how terrifying that ride is? A bunch of animatronic dolls waving at you and singing about how it's a world of FEARS and TEARS? The first time we took the beans on it, in the hopes of soothing their freakout from another ride, Dylan cried himself dry and then just clung to me in horror, while Liam sobbed so much that Kevin had to cue up Toy Story on his PHONE and let him watch it on the boat. After, we high-fived, because clearly we NEVER have to go on that ride again. WINNING.
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
What happens in Vegas is supposed to stay in Vegas, no?
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
Is there something salvageable here?
Reem Acra: Spring/Summer 2016 runway
And here, MAYBE, with the usual caveats? Might I come out of this on a SLIGHTLY less acerbic note?