Iceberg Ahead: It's the Premiere of Titanic

Leonardo DiCaprio and Celine Dion

"But no, I actually really need to know, Leo. DID your heart go on?" "I mean, I guess so? I'm here?" "I have concerns."

Leonardo DiCaprio

Congrats, DiCaprio. You look 100% reasonable here.

Linda Hamilton and James Cameron

Yes, please enjoy our most recent entry into "Remember They Dated?" (They, technically were married.)

Suzy Amis

However! Linda and James broke up when James and Suzy Amis here had an affair; James and Suzy are now married (still), and Linda got fifty million dollars. I personally would rather have a cool fifty mill than be married to James Cameron.

Frances Fisher

"Linda Hamilton is so known for her upper arms. I'll show her some upper arms! Your ticket to this premiere is also a ticket to the gun show, everyone!"

Billy Zane and Jessica Murphy

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Dave Lewis/Shutterstock (282425u) BILLY ZANE AND GIRLFRIEND JESSICA MURPHY " TITANIC " FILM PREMIERE AT MANN'S CHINESE THEATRE, LOS ANGELES, AMERICA - 1997

Billy Zane is so delightfully evil in this movie -- cartoonishly so, eeeevil, even. I appreciate him for that. He too looks reasonable and ageless here.

Bill Paxton and Louise

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Shutterstock (282425w) BILL PAXTON AND WIFE LOUISE " TITANIC " FILM PREMIERE AT MANN'S CHINESE THEATRE, LOS ANGELES, AMERICA - 1997

Bill Paxton truly was in so many films in the late 90s; we're getting to see him and his wife often lately.

Victor Garber

Victor Garber barely looks older today than he did in 1997. IS VICTOR GARBER ALSO A VAMPIRE?

Forest Whittaker

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Bei/Shutterstock (5133063az) Forrest Whittaker Premiere of 'Titanic' December 14, 1997: Los Angeles,CA Forrest Whitaker Premiere of "Titanic" Benefiting the Fulfillment Fund ®Berliner Studio 9710312-29

I almost titled this slide "Forest Whittaker!" so I guess I am pleased to see him! He, too, looks terribly reasonable here.

Christine Baranski

La Baranski, meanwhile, is dressed to kill -- perhaps literally.

Fran Drescher

The Nanny looks terrifically well upholstered.

Sylvester Stallone

For one weird minute, I thought Sly was HOLDING that potted plant -- like he brought it as a gift for James Cameron. Sadly, he is not.

Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Shutterstock (282426q) ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER TITANIC FILM PREMIERE AT THE MANN'S CHINESE THEATRE IN LOS ANGELES, AMERICA - 1997

Maria is quite literally wearing a duvet, I fear. (She had had a baby three months earlier but still!)

Ashley Judd and Bobby Shriver

Speaking of Shrivers! I did not know these two had dated; Ashley looks superb here and could totally wear this now.

Gloria Stuart

She looks fantastic here. Good for you for throwing it into the ocean in the end, Gloria! Even if that guy did go back down there and get it for Britney.

Rupert Everett

I have PROFOUND concerns about the sartorial choices Rupert made upon this night.

Heath Ledger and Lisa Zane

Heath!! (Lisa is Billy Zane's sister and she and Heath dated for a while, so I'm sure they're there to support him. Lisa's suit is memorable!)