Jessica Chastain and the Rest of the Cannes 70th Anniversary Gala

70th Anniversary Red Carpet Arrivals - The 70th Annual Cannes Film Festival

CANNES, FRANCE - MAY 23: Jessica Chastain (C) and Pedro Almodovar (R)attend the 70th Anniversary of the 70th annual Cannes Film Festival at Palais des Festivals on May 23, 2017 in Cannes, France. (Photo by Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images)

I'm conflicted over some of the darts on this, but generally, this is pretty damned glamorous on her. It's VERY Major Movie Star, and it fits her better than many of other other recent dresses that follow this same basic cut. I don't quite know what to call the color. Amber? It's basically the color of an exotic beer.

I am not perhaps AS fond of it from behind. Now she looks a bit like a bridesmaid.

CANNES, FRANCE - MAY 23: Jessica Chastain and Pedro Almodovar attend the 70th Anniversary screening during the 70th annual Cannes Film Festival at Palais des Festivals on May 23, 2017 in Cannes, France. (Photo by Dominique Charriau/WireImage)

The lipstick feels like it's trying to bridge the pink jewels and red nails. I might have reconceived some of this.

Kristin Scott Thomas in Dior

Cannes, FRANCE - 70th Anniversary evening at the 70th Cannes Film Festival. Pictured: Kristin Scott Thomas BACKGRID USA 23 MAY 2017 BYLINE MUST READ: MediaPunch / BACKGRID USA: +1 310 798 9111 / usasales@backgrid.com UK: +44 208 344 2007 / uksales@backgrid.com *UK Clients - Pictures Containing Children Please Pixelate Face Prior To Publication*

This is ostensibly a very young dress -- it's an Elle Fanning kind of joint -- but Kristin Scott Thomas is making elegant sense of it anyway. I think she looks beautiful.

Fan Bingbing in Louis Vuitton

CANNES, FRANCE - MAY 23: Jury member Fan Bingbing and Will Smith attend the 70th Anniversary of the 70th annual Cannes Film Festival at Palais des Festivals on May 23, 2017 in Cannes, France. (Photo by Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images)

Girl, I am thrilled you and Will Smith are having fun -- I assume they're singing "Getting Jiggy With It" but replacing the word "jiggy" with "Cannes-y" -- but maybe stop for a second and send a strongly worded email to Louis Vuitton for sending you a slice of Pepto Bismol nonsense from its Pretty In Pink nostalgia collection.

Uma Thurman in Prada

Cannes, FRANCE - 70th Anniversary evening at the 70th Cannes Film Festival. Pictured: Uma Thurman BACKGRID USA 23 MAY 2017 BYLINE MUST READ: MediaPunch / BACKGRID USA: +1 310 798 9111 / usasales@backgrid.com UK: +44 208 344 2007 / uksales@backgrid.com *UK Clients - Pictures Containing Children Please Pixelate Face Prior To Publication*

I'm underwhelmed by about three-quarters of this. Uma is correct to be all, "LOOK AT MY EARRINGS."

Barbara Meier

Barbara, if you can't fold the fitted sheet, just roll it up into a ball and forget about it.

Juliette Binoche in Armani

CANNES, FRANCE - MAY 23: Juliette Binoche attends the 70th Anniversary screening during the 70th annual Cannes Film Festival at Palais des Festivals on May 23, 2017 in Cannes, France. (Photo by Dominique Charriau/WireImage)

"Yes, that's correct, I am still fabulous."

Mischa Barton

Mischa! You're HERE! And you look pretty great! And... yet you are in satin mules! Well, SOMETHING had to go awry.

Laetitia Casta in Dior

Cannes, FRANCE - 70th Anniversary evening at the 70th Cannes Film Festival. Pictured: Laetitia Casta BACKGRID USA 23 MAY 2017 BYLINE MUST READ: MediaPunch / BACKGRID USA: +1 310 798 9111 / usasales@backgrid.com UK: +44 208 344 2007 / uksales@backgrid.com *UK Clients - Pictures Containing Children Please Pixelate Face Prior To Publication*

I find it very strange that Dior put both her and Charlize in such similar gowns at the same event. Laetitia got the worse end of that stick, but I feel like they should both be annoyed.

Svetlana Khodchenkova in Alberta Ferretti

CANNES, FRANCE - MAY 23: Svetlana Khodchenkova attends the 70th Anniversary screening during the 70th annual Cannes Film Festival at Palais des Festivals on May 23, 2017 in Cannes, France. (Photo by Antony Jones/Getty Images)

HOIK HOIK HOIK. This would have been so cool if its sartorial posture were not all wrong.