Keri Russell Gets a Walk of Fame Star

in Johanna Ortiz

HOLLYWOOD, CA - MAY 30: Actor Keri Russell is honored with Star on The Hollywood Walk of Fame on May 30, 2017 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images)

This seems like an unnecessarily tortured thing to do to some perfectly cute stripes. She, as a human, gives this a certain chicness, but this kind of looks like Miss September in the Super Hot for Seersucker wall calendar (even though I know it's not actually seersucker). And finally... surely she needs help from about two people to put this on and affix it correctly.

It IS ideal for sprawling on the pavement next to one's adornment. Also, WAIT A MINUTE, I only just noticed the pinhole ventilation in her pants. They appear to be patterned. I think... a white pencil skirt would have looked much better with that top.

with Matthew Rhys

** RIGHTS: WORLDWIDE EXCEPT IN FRANCE ** Hollywood, Cali - Actress Keri Russell is honored with Star on The Hollywood Walk of Fame on May 30, 2017 in Hollywood, California Pictured: Keri Russell, Matthew Rhys BACKGRID USA 30 MAY 2017 USA: +1 310 798 9111 / usasales@backgrid.com UK: +44 208 344 2007 / uksales@backgrid.com *UK Clients - Pictures Containing Children Please Pixelate Face Prior To Publication*

He looks handsome. They are such a good-looking couple. I am very, very curious whether their real-life coupling will outlast the show itself. I certainly HOPE it wasn't just borne of being sexy soviet spies together on TV. But, you know, Mary Kay Letourneau just split up from her student, and while that lasted longer than anyone probably expected, LOVE IS DEAD, etc.

HOLLYWOOD, CA - MAY 30: Actors Matthew Rhys and Keri Russell attend as Keri Russell is honored with Star on The Hollywood Walk of Fame on May 30, 2017 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images)

I will accept any and all canoodling pictures as hope for the future.

I assume this is where she discovered her lipstick looks better on her than on him.

For some reason I never noticed, or forgot, that Walk of Fame recipients also get a certificate that looks like something Disneyland would give you for completing a day in the Bibbity Bobbity Boo salon.

with Scott Speedman

SORRY NOEL. I guess you aren't needed.

"NOEL?!? HA HA HA HA HA HA HA."

JJ Abrams and Matt Reeves

I assume these two are there to say, "We are so glad we fell in love with her hair, and so sorry about that time she cut it off, and SO GRATEFUL she grew it back."

with Noah Emmerich and Holly Taylor

HOLLYWOOD, CA - MAY 30: Actors Noah Emmerich, Holly Taylor, Keri Russell and Matthew Rhys attend as Keri Russell is honored with Star on The Hollywood Walk of Fame on May 30, 2017 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images)

You guys, if you invite FBI Agent Stan Whatever to your ceremony, HE WILL FIND OUT YOU'RE SPIES. AM I THE ONLY ONE THINKING CLEARLY HERE?