Go Fug Yourself dot com Search posts, tags and authors

Kim Kardashian

I mean. Kim. We get that you lost 50 lbs of pregnancy weight, and that's great -- I mean it. But you need to go to the dictionary, look up "obvious," and compare those words to your entire wardrobe. You can then look up "hideous" and "no" and "stop it" and "try something else" and "why."

Kim Kardashian

I really, really, sincerely think she has a Pinterest account that is all photos of Jennifer Lopez.

Kim Kardashian

YOU ARE NOT DOING YOUR ASSETS ANY FAVORS.

Kim Kardashian

And it's terrible seated, too. She looks like an old sofa. For someone whose obsession has been turning herself into her own idea of perfection, you'd think she'd wrap herself in things that flatter it. Money can't buy taste, for sure. I guess let's be thankful that it can buy you boy shorts and a bra.

Kim Fugdashian Fugst
Kim was on The Tonight Show discussing Kanye's proposal, dressed as your grandmother's end table, during which we learned that Kanye is planning the wedding -- which is HILARRIBLE to me because you KNOW that guy is the uber-Bridezilla. She also notes that her wedding is going to be "destinational" and that she is going to take his name and be Kim Kardashian West. I was hoping for a mashup -- Westdashian -- or an anagram (Hawked Artisans) but no dice. Oh, and she still has bad taste in outfits. But you knew that. If you want to hear it, I've embedded the clips after the jump. The weird thing is -- and I have never watched her show, so this is new for me -- she doesn't come off as unpleasant, nor unkind. She's just so sculpted in every single way that it's hard to tell whether there's an actual personality in there, or just a lovely vessel that says nice things in a nice tone. I suspect the latter. When E! decides to sever ties, they should just hide lipstick cams in every room of that infernal house and burn that bridge in SPECTACULAR fashion. Clip #1, in which she discusses the engagement and notes that she wants to keep the details of the proposal remarks private, which is fine -- being on camera 80 percent of her life doesn't mean she doesn't have the right to keep something to herself if she wants to -- but I didn't think I'd ever hear her say the words "keep it private" come out of her mouth. She also talks about what an artist Kanye is, with regards to the ring, but... isn't it just a massive honking diamond on a band? What kind of planning that THAT take, other than of the financial variety? And in part two, she talks Kris and Bruce, and North, who apparently never cries, ever, which... listen, I hope it's true, because once that poor love is old enough to realize that her parents gave her a punch-line for a name, she may shed enough tears to drown Planet Kardashia. [Video from Hulu]

1 / 1

Open image in new tab