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# Kimye-ly Played, Kimye
- URL: https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/kimye-ly-played-kimye/
- Published: 2013-09-30T17:00:11.000Z
- Updated: 2016-11-10T01:36:44.000Z
- Author: Heather
- Tags: #wp, #wp-gallery, #slideshow, #Import 2026-10-07 07:35

## Kim Kardashian and KANYE WEST

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/wenn20714040.xml)

Kim: Couldn't we have flown private instead of taking the Eurostar, so that nobody would see me until I'm ready?

KANYE: YOU ARE OUT OF LINE TO SPOOF THIS DECISION.

Kim: I'm not SPOOFING it, I just really kind of want to hide until...

KANYE: YOU HAVE TO TANTALIZE THE PEOPLE. IF YOU SHOW A LITTLE BUT NOT TOO MUCH THEN THEY WILL GET EXCITED AND SUCH, AND THEIR PEARLS THEY CAN CLUTCH. SO BUNDLE UP LIKE OLD-SCHOOL PENNSYLVANIA DUTCH AND USE ME AS A CRUTCH AND THEN SUDDENLY WE'LL BE ON THE COVER OF INTOUCH.

## Kim Kardashian and KANYE WEST

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/spl620132_006.xml)

KANYE: SEE? BLAM! WE ARE GIVING EVERYONE A DOPER VIEWING EXPERIENCE, AND MY LIFE IS THE SEARCH FOR MORE DOPENESS. NO DISRESPECT TO BEN AFFLECK.

## KANYE and Kim and Ciara

![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/wenn20719047.xml)

KANYE: YO, ARE YOU LOOKING AT THIS? IT'S COOL. IT IS THE MOST HONEST PIECE OF CLEAVAGE IN YEARS. EVEN CIARA IS STARING. AND WHAT THE HELL IS *SHE* WEARING? HER THIGH IS OVERSHARING. PIPE DOWN, CIARA, 'CAUSE MY GIRL'S CLEAVAGE IS BLARING, AND TO GO SHE'S BEEN RARING, BECAUSE SHE'S BEEN PREPARING TO WEAR SOMETHING DARING FOR WEEKS SINCE THE CHILDBEARING. HOW IS SHE FARING? SAY 'WELL' OR I'LL BE GLARING ALL DAY AND MY TEMPER WILL BE FLARING. SPEAKING OF WHICH I THINK KRIS JENNER MIGHT KIDNAP CIARA FOR NOT OFFERING TO DYE HER HAIR A DIFFERENT COLOR THAN KIM'S. SHOULD I TELL HER? NAH. KIDNAPPING BETWEEN FRIENDS IS MOSTLY JUST DOPE ART.

[Kimye-ly Played, KimyeKim: Psst. Kanye. KANYE: YES, WHAT IS IT? Kim: Thanks for crawling on your hands and knees through a roughly dug trench just to get me a breast pump that works in French outlets. KANYE: IT WAS NOTHING, Kim: It means a lot to ME. KANYE: NO REALLY IT WAS NOTHING, BECAUSE I DID NOT DO THAT. Kim: Sorry, I just assumed because of the pants... KANYE: MY PANTS ARE THE MOST HONEST PIECE OF FABRIC IN YEARS. Kim: Let's just get to the car. \[Photos: WENN, Splash\]![](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/content/files/www-gofugyourself-com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/wenn20714040.xml)](https://go-fug-yourself.ghost.io/kimye-ly-played-kimye-09-2013/)