Fyodor Golan - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
I feel like this is all the stuff China Chow would wear. She's ALL ABOUT looking like a lucky rabbit's foot.
Fyodor Golan - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
This is wackadoo but also strangely beautiful. I love that it's sculpted to look like she has an accordion fan open in front of her.
Fyodor Golan - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
This reminds me of the scene in "The Great Muppet Caper" where Miss Piggy is in Lady Holiday's fashion show.
Fyodor Golan - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
MURDER BY PAINTBALL.
Fyodor Golan - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
Absurd. Panty culottes. If I were this outfit's tactful fifth grade teacher I might write, "Not enough fabric to be a worthwhile endeavor."
Julien Macdonald - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
Porno Marchesa.
Julien Macdonald - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
This is the first one so far that might actually turn up on the red carpet, for better or worse. It reminds me of Naomi Watts.
Julien Macdonald - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
And of course this reminds me of Kristen Stewart.
Julien Macdonald - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
Why am I thinking Paula Patton?
Julien Macdonald - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
That is totally disco cute.
Julien Macdonald - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
Do we think that's, shall we say, ventilated on the sides? That idea seems very Gwyneth to me.
Julien Macdonald - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
PLAYED. SO VERY, VERY PLAYED. IT'S PLAYED LIKE AMERICAN IDOL.
Julien Macdonald - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
Come on, Goldie Hawn. I feel like this is what she has bought and then told Kate, "If I am cremated in summer, I want to go in this."
Julien Macdonald - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
Sandra Bullock could pull this off, no?
House Of Holland - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
Is that a lace skirt, or lace bike shorts? Do we think the Virgin Mary has a preference?
House Of Holland - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
Rihanna does love a weird, coordinated pantsuit.
House Of Holland - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
This is retro-cute, though -- like Zooey Deschanel, if she were a tad more adventurous.
House Of Holland - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
I'm not sure what to do with this. Wish it upon a WAG, perhaps.
House Of Holland - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
And then back to cute.
House Of Holland - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
Horribly unflattering shape on her, and that belt sits there like a gilded, winking Band-Aid.
House Of Holland - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
This optical illusion cracks me up. It's a video screen at the foot of the runway, playing images shot from above, but it looked in thumbnail like the models were being lowered onto the catwalk while flailing.
Mark Fast - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
I also feel like Rihanna would respond to this. Including possibly the hair and makeup.
Mark Fast - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
She is slowly unraveling.
Mark Fast - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
There are outfits in our archives from 2005 that look like this. I mean, remember Blu Cantrell? Yeah. This is pure Blu Cantrell.
Tabernacle Twins - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
I am horrified by those pants. It's like there is a vaginal triangle right there JUST IN CASE you did not know what was hiding therein.
Tabernacle Twins - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
These are the worst shorts since the post office said, "Hey! How about shorts?"
Tabernacle Twins - Runway: London Fashion Week SS14
Good gravy. That's not polterwant; it's poltersalami.