Maggie Gyllenhaal in Valentino

Her HEAD looks pretty good? And I might dig this cape if it were draped over something VERY LOW KEY at a wholly other event. But that's the nicest thing I can say about it because....I mean COME ON.

Maggie Gyllenhaal in Valentino

I feel like the tenseness in her mouth bespeaks, "holy shit you guys what was I thinking with this? Hold it together, Mags. HOLD YOURSELF TOGETHER."

Jake and Maggie Gyllenhaal

...I'm not entirely sure Jake is helping matters.

Met Gala Fug Carpet: Maggie Gyllenhaal in Valentino

I DO NOT KNOW how she thought this had ANYTHING to do with Charles James. This would be PERFECT if the theme were, say, A Salute to Twister, or Shit You Can Do To Your Shower Curtain Once You Remodel The Bathroom, or The Partridge Family, or Random Outfits Maggie Gyllenhaal Bought Once Online In a Moment of Weakness. But as far as I know, it was not. [Photos: Getty]