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Joaquin Phoenix

PARIS, FRANCE - NOVEMBER 14: Joaquin Phoenix attends the "Napoleon" World Premiere at Salle Pleyel on November 14, 2023 in Paris, France. (Photo by Marc Piasecki/Getty Images)

He looks about 80 percent of the way there, which seems like his MO? There is definitely no way he actually cares about his pants.

Vanessa Kirby in custom McQueen

PARIS, FRANCE - NOVEMBER 14: Vanessa Kirby attends the "Napoleon" World Premiere at Salle Pleyel on November 14, 2023 in Paris, France. (Photo by Marc Piasecki/WireImage)

This, however, is GLORIOUS. It's as precise as you would want a custom look to be -- well done to her stylist Karla Welch here -- and it's so much more interesting than a lot of what she typically wears. Her hair hung in her face for about 95 percent of the photos, so it must have been the desired effect. That's a bit Femme Fatale for a dress that's more traditionally glamorous, and I'd have made a different choice, but the rest of this is *chef's kiss*.

Rooney Mara in D&G

PARIS, FRANCE - NOVEMBER 14: Rooney Mara attends the "Napoleon" World Premiere at Salle Pleyel on November 14, 2023 in Paris, France. (Photo by Marc Piasecki/Getty Images)

And Rooney Rooney'd in D&G (she is Joaquin's partner; she's not in the movie). There's actually a little interest there in the front, with the fringe, and I don't hate it. But I think her makeup is too... daytime/clean, maybe? Smoke out those eyes or deepen that lip, right?

Napoleon Is Here, and Not Short
The movie, I mean. 

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