Zac Posen - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
Naomi Campbell opened Posen's show in this dress, which I think is so very lovely -- not a big Important Gown, obviously, but sometimes big Important Models are enough on their own.
Zac Posen - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
Coco Rocha closed it in this, at a slow glide. It would be so exceptional if somebody dared to wear that on the red carpet. Instead we have to hope for a celebrity wedding that's NOT covert, and/or for Blake and Ryan to decide to do public annual vow renewals.
Zac Posen - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
Remember when Olivia Wilde was first trying to make a splash, and she'd show up first on the red carpet in something ginormous, so that you'd have a hard time forgetting her? This is somebody's "FIRST" dress -- said in the same tone I imagine in my head every time I read a blog post where the first twelve people in the comments all shout FIRST because they think they won.
Zac Posen - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
Not crazy about the tulle bridging the sternum here -- it looks like a dead butterfly in a scrapbook -- but I feel like, say, Julie Bowen could do worse than this. And has.
Oscar De La Renta - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
So cute. The shoes are a bit of a bridge too far, perhaps, but I would love to be the girl who swans around town in this.
Oscar De La Renta - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
It is EXCEEDINGLY entertaining to me that Oscar de la Renta made this. It's so much more bebe.
Oscar De La Renta - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
I mean, this is so tremendous. Terrific, simple, striking. It doesn't look like it's even by the same PERSON, much less that it came down the same runway within the same minute.
Oscar de la Renta
I just wanted to show you these -- those little bobbles bounced and danced with every step the model took. The pink dress has teal backing the color of the bobbles. I love the white one, and I actually find the pink one hilariously bright as well -- I mean, I'd be THRILLED if someone wore it on the red carpet, but I'd also probably wonder why anyone picked a dress made entirely out of things cats like to swat.
Oscar De La Renta - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
This model has a Diane Kruger-esque quality to her -- in fact, D.Krugs would wear a lot of this stuff, totally unchanged.
Reem Acra
This is clearly the 'roided out sibling of the previous gown.
Naeem Khan - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
Whereas this is... I don't know. Their mother. It was lovely on the runway, AND it comes with a cape, so I'm guessing we might just find out whether anyone other than Gwyneth can pull off that feat on a red carpet.
Reem Acra - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
And then Reem Acra had a bunch of naked panels, because THAT is what the world needs right now. I'm sure the likes of Katy Perry will enjoy those. Or, like, a Hayden Panettiere, looking to make a splash at the Emmys.
Reem Acra - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
Hmm. Lea Michele? She loves a neck plunge.
Reem Acra
Tinkerbell.
Reem Acra - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
PLEASE, everyone, stop making this dress.
Badgley Mischka - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
No, seriously, I've had enough. Just stop making these. EVERYONE has done them already. It's time to move onto more fertile and less vulva-centric pastures.
Carolina Herrera - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
Did somebody wallpaper over this poor girl?
Carolina Herrera
There are a lot of interesting motifs here, and some unusual choices, but all together they look like fashion graffiti to me. And not in a good way; in that busy way where you can't tell what the heck you're even looking at and then by the time you start to put it together, it's gone, so you just forget it even happened.
Carolina Herrera
I call this dress Nipple Sunrise.
Lela Rose - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
LOVE. Lela Rose had some fun day dresses. Demi Lovato could bust this sucker out on X-Factorwhile making somebody cry.
Lela Rose - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
And then they could cut to Britney wearing this, looking all ladylike, until she opens her mouth and says something EVEN more fearsome. I don't know how hard they really had to work to pull Brit-Brit out of her shell, but they certainly edited it to make her look chock full of brutal honesty. She told a dude at one point, "Who let you on-stage? I'm not comfortable with you even looking at me right now." And he deserved it.
Lela Rose - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
We were discussing this on my Instagram/on Twitter. A consensus was that a Fanning would look super charming in this, although I had Hailee Steinfeld on my list also.
Lela Rose - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
This is like groovy torso prison. That is a compliment somehow.
Lela Rose - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
Beautiful. For when Demi Moore decides to pull it together, finally.
Lela Rose
Lela Rose also did some deceptively simple stuff that was stunning. I love these colors -- orange is apparently really about to have a moment. Which is interesting because I thought it was already having one.
Badgley Mischka - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
This feels very Sarah Hyland, the oldest daughter on Modern Family.
Naeem Khan - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
So pretty and so simple. I'm stumped on who I want to see in it. Elisabeth Moss doesn't seem quite right. Nor does Tami Taylor. Maybe we can get a first-timer in there.
Naeem Khan - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
I love this so much. Ariel Winter from Modern Family is probably the only person who could get away with it at the Emmys, though, where cocktail-length is a rarity. It would REALLY look best in my closet, though. Where it would have to live in perpetuity because I don't go anywhere.
Naeem Khan
I'm in love with these, too. PLEASE let someone wear fiery orange. Come on, Margulies. You could carry it. Or January Jones, although she'll be too busy with something boobalicious from Versace.
Naeem Khan - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
So pretty it hurts.
Naeem Khan - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
Jessica noted that she's happy to see Naeem Khan looking out for all the ladies who just want a sparkly caftan, which she meant sincerely. And it's true. If Cloris Leachman doesn't bust out one of these bad boys at the Emmys, then she's shopping wrong.
Rodarte - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
This looks like something Charlize Theron would wear in another one of her terrifying commercials. Which I know are for a different brand, but still. She's wear that while trying to stare me -- and scare me -- into buying some perfume and then suddenly I'd smell like a department store.
Rodarte - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
If you have a trunk growing out of your chest, does that count as elephantitis of the boobs?
Rodarte - Runway - Spring 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week
This just looks like somebody's chastity gate rode up.
Jenny Packham
Polka-dots! Hooray!
Jenny Packham
I'll take one each of these two, please. They will go over so well at the black-tie affairs I attend daily, like the pre-school drop-off, or the produce section at Ralph's.
Jenny Packham
Both these party frocks had the solid black backs that you see on the right. I love them wholeheartedly. If the long dresses are more Kate, then these are the Pippas, minus whatever behavioral issues caused her to hang out with douchewads in Paris who play with guns. I MEAN.
Jenny Packham
Princess Catherine must wish she could bust out more leg every once in a while. She probably DOES wear this stuff around the house when she's dusting, or rearranging picture frames, or chopping onions. Because when else are they going to let her out of the house in a flouncy mini? You have to find your jollies where you can.