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Cardi B in Dolce & Gabbana

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Stephen Lovekin/REX/Shutterstock (9876403dl) Cardi B Harper's Bazaar ICONS party, Arrivals, Spring Summer 2019, New York Fashion Week, USA - 07 Sep 2018

This feels almost like the Red Devil version of her priestly Met Gala look. The skirt has some sheer portions, which you can't really see here, but they're not extreme? Look, this is A Whole Lot for me, but Cardi B is nothing if not A Whole Lot, and she's carrying it.

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Kristina Bumphrey/StarPix/REX/Shutterstock (9876827aw) Cardi B Harper's BAZAAR celebrates fifth ICONS by Carine Roitfeld, Spring Summer 2019, New York Fashion Week, USA - 07 Sep 2018

Just to be clear, Cardi B did NOT have a bump percolating on her face at the beginning of the night. Also, we didn't have a photo of the torn dress, although there was one of her exiting barefoot, but it wasn't very interesting. However...

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Charles Sykes/Invision/AP/REX/Shutterstock (9876676a) Cardi B, with a bump on her forehead, leaves after an altercation at the Harper's BAZAAR "ICONS by Carine Roitfeld" party at The Plaza, New York. Nicki Minaj and Cardi B have been involved in an altercation that got physical at a New York Fashion Week party. Video circulating on social media shows Cardi B lunging toward someone and being held back at Harper's Bazaar Icons party. A person who witnessed the incident who asked for anonymity because they were not authorized to speak publicly said Minaj was finishing up a conversation with someone when Cardi B tried to attack her, but Minaj's security guards intervened Harper's Bazaar Icons 2018, New York, USA - 07 Sep 2018

But afterwards... The only time I've seen a welt that big was when Liam, when he was about three, tripped in our garage and whacked his forehead on the concrete floor. At first people were crying photoshop, but it's appeared in too many photos from too many different services, besides which these photos were up and available and in an email alert to us too quickly after it happened for there to be shenanigans. My theory is that in the scuffle someone elbowed her in the head by accident. Unless you believe she brought a prosthetic one knowing she was going to start a ruckus, and glued it to her face real fast before she left. I LOVE that theory, which I just now made up, but also think it's... insane and therefore only likely to happen on Days of our Lives. 

Nicki Minaj in Alexandre Vauthier

North America Rights Only - New York, USA -20180908- Celebrities seen arriving for the Harpers Bazaar Icons Party during New York Fashion Week. -PICTURED: Nicki Minaj -PHOTO by: Vantagenews.com/INSTARimages.com This is an editorial, rights-managed image. Please contact Instar Images LLC for licensing fee and rights information at sales@instarimages.com or call +1 212 414 0207 This image may not be published in any way that is, or might be deemed to be, defamatory, libelous, pornographic, or obscene. Please consult our sales department for any clarification needed prior to publication and use. Instar Images LLC reserves the right to pursue unauthorized users of this material. If you are in violation of our intellectual property rights or copyright you may be liable for damages, loss of income, any profits you derive from the unauthorized use of this material and, where appropriate, the cost of collection and/or any statutory damages awarded

She was in a pretty good mood, I'd say.

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Kristina Bumphrey/StarPix/REX/Shutterstock (9876827ev) Nicki Minaj Harper's BAZAAR celebrates fifth ICONS by Carine Roitfeld, Spring Summer 2019, New York Fashion Week, USA - 07 Sep 2018

She is two cup sizes too big for that bodice, and the wet blond hair is not my favorite iteration of ANYONE, much less Nicki Minaj. But she did technically come out the winner in this bonkers feud -- if nothing else, then by virtue of having a clutch of bodyguards, not getting hit by a shoe, barely blinking, and not having to leave.

, New York, NY - 20180907 Celebrity guests arriving at the Harper's Bazaar ICONS party for New York Fashion Week Spring Summer 2019. -PICTURED: Nicki Minaj -PHOTO by: NANCY RIVERA/INSTARimages.com This is an editorial, rights-managed image. Please contact Instar Images LLC for licensing fee and rights information at sales@instarimages.com or call +1 212 414 0207 This image may not be published in any way that is, or might be deemed to be, defamatory, libelous, pornographic, or obscene. Please consult our sales department for any clarification needed prior to publication and use. Instar Images LLC reserves the right to pursue unauthorized users of this material. If you are in violation of our intellectual property rights or copyright you may be liable for damages, loss of income, any profits you derive from the unauthorized use of this material and, where appropriate, the cost of collection and/or any statutory damages awarded

This photo just made me laugh. She looks like she's leaning against a stool. If that dress comes with one under there -- like a kickstand for your butt -- that would be GENIUS.

Cardi B Threw a Shoe at Nicki Minaj at a Harper's Bazaar Party
"Who throws a shoe?" asked Austin Powers.

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