1973: Cybill Shepherd
Cybill is a strong opening salvo for this pack of covers, as is the story about how to drink and stay slim.
1974: Cher
I guess the holidays issues are more wine-focused, as this one ALSO wants to help us understand more about it. I also really enjoy the concept of "the naive dinner." What in the world.
1975: Patti Hansen
We're in the era where all the covers are SO tight on their faces, which for a fashion magazine is a strange choice. Allure, sure, but not Vogue.
1976: Rosie Vela
Vogue's repeated and earnest use of "super duper" also makes me laugh.
1977: Rene Russo
"The jewels, the furs, the men who give them" is the most regressive thing. At least nowadays it would be "BUY THEM FOR YOURSELF."
1978: Moria Casán
This cover is super uninformative about what "the body is it" means to fashion. I can GUESS, but.
1979: Kim Alexis
My skin is telling me I am almost certainly not living right, but we'll solve that problem another day. Still. For a cover that includes a lot of blah elements, Kim Alexis is still shining.
1980: Kim Alexis
Y'all! "The new romance" includes delight! WHO KNEW.
1981: Kim Alexis
It's a Kim trifecta. I can certainly see why you'd zero in in HER face, since it gets the job done so well. (Fragrance: The Hidden Persuader" is hilarious to me.)
1982: Isabella Rossellini
This photo does not have the charm i would have expected for a cover that screams CHARM.
1983: Brooke Shields
This photo screams "apres ski" to me. And it's lovely. Please enjoy it, because the next cover is INSANE.
1984: Alexa Singer
You're right, Vogue. I AM delighted. I am DELIGHTED IN THE EXTREME that you picked a cover photo where the model looks completely baffled as to what is happening, and why, and when it might stop.
1985: Renée Simonsen
Just what I want: A cover that looks like this woman has been asked to climb a ladder.
1986: Estelle Lefébure
NONSTOP DRESSING sounds stressful.
1987: Cindy Crawford
This is giving me a crick in my neck just from looking at it.
1988: Michaela Bercu
This model has SUCH a Gigi Hadid vibe.
1989: Michaela Bercu
There's certainly a lot more joy in this cover, and the last one, than in any of the preceding. It isn't REMOTELY wintery, though.
1990: Claudia Schiffer
Also not wintery. Sheer clothes don't really scream November to me.
1991: Claudia Schiffer
THERE we go. Although she looks so wary. Perhaps she is thinking, "There is nothing NEW about that racism or any racism."
1992: Cindy and Richard Gere
Cindy's hair is a riot here. I think it's supposed to look like it's being blown by wind, but there wasn't any, so it's just sprayed and teased higher than a cathedral ceiling.
1993: Nadja Auermann
The fact that "Are you dressing your age" was written by a dude is... very telling and typical. Nadja resembles someone in this photo and I can't put my finger on who it is, other than that it isn't Nadja.
1994: Cindy
Oh, come on, Vogue. Just make it "For Whom Do Women Really Dress?" Also, this cover has managed to make Cindy Crawford look silly, which is a real achievement.
1995: Kirsty Hume
That's pretty good. And also surprising to see the cover model in a basic white ski suit.
1996: Linda Evangelista
This also works, because Linda Evangelista will pull focus no matter what you do.
1997: Stella Tennant
I didn't recognize her -- she's so synonymous to me now with the dark pixie cut. This is a cover they really should revisit now, because it feels like Stella is just ambling along the beach in her sweats and happened to look up, which is VERY atypical for Vogue but very very typical of 2020.
1998: Amber Valletta
Not gonna lie, I WOULD like better teeth.
1999: Kate Moss, Gisele, Lauren Hutton, Iman
There are more models on the trifold, but this is the only one I have, and it's the main cover so that's your impact. It is not impressive of any of them except maybe Lauren Hutton. Please explain to me why they had Iman pose like she has cramps.
2000: Carmen Kass, Angela Lindvall, Maggie Rizer, Frankie Rayder
And this is a bland assemblage of identical people. Only Angela Lindvall, standing, stands out at all. And there is something enormously dismissive about the cover line, "Another Model Bobs Her Hair." That's practically The Onion in tone.
2001: Britney
This looks like she's about to go down a slide at a July 4 party, which is weird for November for a LOT of reasons.
2002: Catherine Zeta-Jones and Renee Zellweger
There have been so many better pictures of BOTH these women.
2003: Uma
This would be more breathtaking without all the words, because they step on the illusion that she's standing at a great height on a beam. Sadly her face doesn't pop here at all, either.
2004: Jennifer Connelly
I don't know if Jennifer Connelly's allure is mysterious? She's incredibly beautiful. It's not hard to parse.
2005: Reese
There are also better photos of Reese -- I don't know why she's sitting in a field -- but compared to the next cover, it's a ray of light.
2006: Cate Blanchett
"Warm Up" is ironic considering how chilly this is, but most importantly: That is not Cate Blanchett's face. It looks more like Christine from Selling Sunset.
2007: Jennifer Connelly
This is a way less flattering cover of her than the other one. Bizarrely so.
2008: Reese
Oh, wow, and just like 2004 and 2005, we have a Connelly-to-Witherspoon progression. I like the bob and the smirk, but it's not very Vogue. I don't know WHAT magazine this feels right for, honestly.
2009: Kidman, Cotillard, Cruz, and Hudson
I don't know if the women were all together in THIS shot, but they WERE all on set with each other on this day. You'd never know it. They ALL feel dropped in from an alien universe, but particularly, WHAT HAS BEEN DONE TO NICOLE KIDMAN.
2010: Anne Hathaway
This is better, but she also looks kind of like Eva Mendes?!? Let's just let people look like themselves.