Lindsay Lohan in custom Balenciaga

Real talk: Lindsay looks GREAT. This is FANTASTIC on her.

Brenda Song and Macaulay Culkin (in Valentino)

Brenda looks gorgeous and this photo feels like the bride at a fabulous country club afternoon wedding posing with her cousin, a guest.

Hailey Bieber in custom Saint Laurent

She looks lovely AND also you could ABSOLUTELY get this without going custom.

Cara Delevingne in custom GapStudio

Yes, this is denim, and she looks great in it -- even the arm warmers.

Sheryl Lee Ralph

Gorgeous, as usual -- perfectly understated.

Kendall Jenner in Mugler SS92

Honestly, I love it. I love the dress, and I love the styling. It's so Jackie Collins Writes a Witch Book.

Lil Nas X

This is likewise understated for him specifically -- and it's great on him.

Sofia Carson in Elie Saab

She looks like a gorgeous rich widow -- but someone On the Internet said she is posing like a wax figure and it's really true and I'm obsessed with it.

Louisa Jacobson

Ah, Marion of The Gilded Age, child of Streep! If you want to go out in your undies, so be it. (I think this haircut is cute on her; it's very Winona Ryder 1994.)

Ruth Negga in Michael Kors

This is IMPECCABLE. She looks perfect.

Adria Arjona

This looks too big on her and also like hotel curtains on rumspringa.

Olivia Rodrigo in Roberto Cavalli

I love it. (I might have worn a different shoe, but perhaps it was too much?)

Cole Tucker and Vanessa Hudgens

This is far from the wackiest thing she's ever worn to this event.

Shay Mitchell

This looks a little big on her, perhaps, but it's very good otherwise.

Kelly Rowland in Stephane Rolland

This may be divisive, but I love it. It's so streamlined but also unusual.

Jessica Betts and Niecy Nash-Betts

This does not look comfy on Niecy's boobs!! Jessica, as ever, looks spectac.

Kim Kardashian in custom Balenciaga

Bridal on the front...

Kim Kardashian in custom Balenciaga

...also pretty bridal on the back. This is a two-faced dress and I suspect people will hate it but I think it's kind of cool? I also think her head looks good!

Anna Sawai in Vivienne Westwood

I MEAN HONESTLY! She has looked STUNNING all awards season.

Serena Williams

This feels like it needs a little arranging, but I can't imagine anyone is going to be actively MAD about it or anything.

James Marsden

Dishy!

Lamorne Morris

Also dishy, this time with extra lapel pins!

Alison Brie

This is boring but she looks good in it? If somewhat unrecognizable with the bangs.

Abbi Jacobson

I just said the words, "I....don't....think so." To my empty apartment.

Julia Garner in Gucci

This is absolutely beautiful and her earrings are MAJESTIC.

Ellen Pompeo

I honestly think this might be one of her better looks...of all time? It's just really good.

Tracee Ellis Ross in Alexandre Vauthier

THIS IS FUN.

Tracee Ellis Ross in Alexandre Vauthier

Even when not in motion.

Natasha Rothwell

Oh no, I love her and this is not working for me. The sash aspect is so distracting?

Chrissy Teigen in Andrew Kwon and John Legend

I was so distracted by Chrissy's (reasonable) dress that I just noticed John is wearing a cape.

Laverne Cox in vintage Mugler

This is so fun. She looks like a grown-up Batgirl. It's really a kick.

Reneé Rapp

I thought this dress included a giant fanny pack but I think it's just weirdly draped tulle? It WOULD be nice to have a place for snacks.

Michael Keaton

Classic!

Jessica Williams

This feels so traditional and old-fashioned -- in a good way. She looks pretty!

Boris Kodjoe and Nicole Ari Parker

Speaking of pretty...this couple.

Taraji P. Henson

I appreciate that she wore a formal amoeba.

Noah Centineo

Sure! This is very well-done.

Russell Westbrook

This is cool on him -- he's a generally reliable clotheshorse.

Dan Stevens

I did NOT recognize Cousin Matthew here AT ALL. He looks like the heir to a Swedish fish fortune.

Dominic Sessa

This feels like the right amount of cool for this party.

Henry Golding

CLASSIC. How absolutely swoony.

Iris Law

This is seriously just a fancy sheet tied shut.

Maisie Williams

!!!!!!!!!!!!! I honestly kind of love it.

Stephanie Hsu

She wears this well but it is definitely mildly goofy. At least it's easy to walk in!

Mia Goth in Dior

It makes me laugh that you can tell she was playing with the nap on this velvet in the car on the way over. Relatable!

Sophie Thatcher

This is very entertaining. Somewhere, Moira Rose is DELIGHTED.

Justine Lupe

I kind of like this but I also acknowledge it has a hint of Goop's Ralph Lauren Oscars dress...which I secretly did also always kind of like.

Cole Escola

I just realized the bottom of this photo is blurry. Is Cole APPARATING?!?!

Ava Max

I'm too tired to get into my notes about this general hair vibe, which was not confined to her.

Madison Bailey

I wish this vest closed a little more tightly than it does.

Malin Åkerman

This is fun, honestly.

Camilla Luddington

Imagine this in ANY OTHER COLOR.

Xochitl Gomez

LOVE. This is so kicky and fun and right for a party.

JC Chasez

That is a dapper suit. Where is HIS world tour, I ask you.

Alyssa Milano

This is...weird. It doesn't seem like it fits correctly AND it's sort of funereal?

Matt Bomer

God bless. This is very good on him and a VERY big swing.

Sophia Bush

Sure! I'm in favor of more trousers at these after parties.

Kathryn Hahn

This is like a formal table runner.

Monica Lewinsky

She looks great in this. Good for Monica for surviving and thriving.

Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgwick

Someone haul out the REASONABLE KLAXON.

Chelsea Handler

This needs to be shorter, right? Not a lot shorter. But shorter.

Natasha Lyonne

This is simple and good, and really lets her (great) jewelry sing.

Harvey Guillén

I love this. I might have gone for a low-scoop-neck tank under it?

Kaitlyn Dever

And this has a kicky retro flapper vibe but I also wish it were shorter! Shorter all around!

Lukita Maxwell

I kept thinking that was a large beige clutch she was holding up, and... I wish it had been.

Pacey

BIG FINISH.

Oscar Parties: The One Million People Who Wore Black, White, or Something Similarly Neutral

Literally a MILLION. ONE MILLION PEOPLE.