TELECAST: Chloe Grace Moretz in Miu Miu
This is a LOT of wrong.
TELECAST: Felicity Jones in McQueen
Some people liked this, but on the whole I think... it didn't quite add up.
TELECAST: Gwyneth Paltrow in Ralph & Russo
Some people ALSO liked this, and again, for me it fell flat enough and looked silly enough that I am stomping my foot and putting it in here. She GOOPified the runway version -- making it tight and lean -- and in the end it just made the flower look more absurd.
TELECAST: Jennifer Aniston in Versace
She had a GREAT time, and so did anyone who got a peek at her privates.
TELECAST: Jessica Chastain in Givenchy
Two dresses in one. I'd have settled for the blue sequins without the drapery.
TELECAST: Julianne Moore in Chanel
This is custom, and it is terrible. It's not flattering, the decals look cheap... this was the biggest night of her career, and she'd been KILLING IT, and then suddenly... she killed it in a whole different way.
TELECAST: Katie Cassidy
Come on, kid. This was never going to work.
TELECAST: Keira Knightley in Valentino
Too twee for words. Even the words that are written on it.
TELECAST: Kerry Washington in Miu Miu
I got very upset with this. That top is unforgivable.
TELECAST: Lorelei Linklater
Where does one even find this? The gift shop at a cardiology wing of a hospital?
TELECAST: Lupita Nyong'o in Calvin Klein
And here we are again, for those of you who weren't enamored. To me, SHE is charming, but the dress does horrible things to her body.
TELECAST: Marion Cotillard in Dior
Sigh.
TELECAST: Nicole Kidman in Louis Vuitton
This looks too cheap. Nicole Kidman should never look inexpensive.
TELECAST: Solange in Christian Siriano
It's very Solange, but it's also VERY INSANE.
POST-PARTIES: Beyonce
This was just underwhelming. It might not be the outright worst, but Beyonce should ALWAYS be able to do better than this.
POST-PARTIES: Chloe Grace Moretz in McQueen
Girlfriend is barreling toward Fug Madness.
POST-PARTIES: Cody Simpson (with Gigi Hadid)
Gigi's is dumb, but Cody's hat is tragic. He is about to pick his teeth with some straw.
POST-PARTIES: Heidi Klum in Versace
NICE PUBIS.
POST-PARTIES: Irina Shayk
I forgot that she just broke up with Cristiano Ronaldo. Nothing says "SUCK IT, HOT EX BOYFRIEND," like this.
POST-PARTIES: Kat Graham
Eyeroll.
POST-PARTIES: Katie Cassidy
EYEROLL.
POST-PARTIES: Kelly Lynch
CHORTLE.
POST-PARTIES: Lady Victoria Hervey
Pretty sure she thinks this is winning.
POST-PARTIES: Lil' Kim
I laugh every time I see her facial expression. I don't even know if she INTENDED to make it, and yet.
POST-PARTIES: Lily Collins
No. Just no. Although the fact that she wore this and people are still even bothering to discuss her haircut is kind of an achievement.
POST-PARTIES: Lindsey Ellingson in Gucci
Totally crackers.
POST-PARTIES: Marion Cotillard
You're physically hurting me, Marion.
POST-PARTIES: Marisa Tomei
I don't even know what to DO with this.
POST-PARTIES: Meagan Good
Does nothing fit anymore?
POST-PARTIES: Miley Cyrus
I almost deleted her from this, because after the last parade of looks, this seems COMPLETELY sane.
POST-PARTIES: Natasha Bedingfield
Along came a spider, who sat down beside her, and bought some real estate and moved in.
POST-PARTIES: Rita Ora
This is actually just sad to me.
POST-PARTIES: Rose McGowan
AND SCENE.