Salma Hayek

I might be neutral on Salma's hair here -- is this an attempt at the Wet Look? -- but also who cares? The rest of this is amazing on her.

Diane Kruger in Givenchy

On the other hand, while Diane is capable of carrying a lot...this is not it. It's like Spanx, a disco door hanging, and compression socks. Just because you're physically capable of placing an item onto your corporeal form, it doesn't mean you SHOULD.

Quinta Brunson

This is sexier than usual for Quinta and I like this swerve for her!

Awkwafina in Cong Tri

And this is MUCH leggier than she usually goes -- and I continue to hate those shoes -- but I also like THIS swerve for her. This dress is CUTE. Also looks comfy, which is a great twofer.

Sharon Stone

Shazzer's an icon and I suspect this gown was baller in person but this color never really photographs that well.

Lindsay Lohan (in Balenciaga) and Bader Shammas

Honestly? Lilo looks GREAT in this. I'd love to see her with slightly shorter hair but honestly, that's a tiny nitpick. This is a hit.

Dominique Fishback in Bach Mai

I don't hate this but it also, at the same time, looks like the entire thing is being pulled to the floor by weirdly strong forces of gravity.

Ncuti Gatwa

BLESS NCUTI FOR GOING FOR IT. On a night when he was A Ken, why not? (I sort of think it might have worked with a jacket as well, but I get why they skipped it.)

Kylie Minogue

This is SO spring-y and charming. (And I wish I'd been at the Madonna show where she was the guest; I got Eric Andre. Which is fine but NO KYLIE!)

Jessica Alba

Honestly? This is a slam dunk for her. She hasn't looked this fabulous in ages. (Not that she generally looks BAD or anything; she's Jessica Alba. It just is extra striking!)

Cardi B in Atelier Versace SS03 Couture

This photo cracked me up. If Cardi is going to do one thing, it is vamp for the camera. I adore her for going for vintage!

Beatrice Grannò in Armani

This is really fun -- and those pailletes are so big, it almost looks like her dress is blurry.

Pamela Anderson in Oscar de la Renta

First, I am OBSESSED with this caftan. And I know she's doing the No Hair and Makeup thing for Reasons, but I also think this is an example where a very undone face does work well with a jazzy outfit.

Saweetie

This is extremely glamorous and good on her and I almost wish she'd worn it to an event with fewer people! I'm worried she's going to get lost in the shuffle!

Sandra Oh

This is DELIGHTFUL. I could not resist this picture. It's such a party!

Katharine McPhee in Valdrian Sahiti

This (literal) fit is perfect on her but this feels maybe a bit...overbaked?

Matt Damon and Luciana Damon

Clearly ENRAGED by Kimmel's behavior.

Jon Hamm and Anna Osceola

Jon Hamm looks like Jon Hamm; I love that Anna's dress seems likely comfy.

Helen Hunt

I think she needed SLIGHTLY stronger makeup, but this dress is GREAT. I say that as someone who is not a huge Helen Hunt fan, historically speaking. Perhaps now the tide has turned!

Amber Riley

It does look fun to dance in!

Usher

Honestly, this ALSO looks fun to dance in.

Serayah McNeill and Joey Bada$$

And this looks like the perfect ensemble in which to practice your high kicks.

Maude Apatow in Richard Quinn

This is absolutely pretty. Quinn showed it on the runway with gloves and I also would have removed them. Does that make me and Maude basic? VERY LIKELY.

Ashley Graham

Everything appears to be in order here.

Este, Alana and Danielle Haim

I assume these are LV; Middle Haim absolutely wins this race.

Yara Shahidi

This feels both glam and easy. A feat!

Coco Jones

Oh, I love this on her! (Also I decided she bought it after the premiere of Feud when she was briefly obsessed with the Swans.)

Phoebe Dynevor in Louis Vuitton

Truly....snooze. Just cut it to the mini-length and buy it at Revolve and get on with it.

Iris Law in Tom Ford

Is this vaguely reminiscent of complicated horizontal blinds? For sure. And yet...she does look cool. "And everyone has already forgotten The Idol," I almost wrote, before remembering that was Lily-Rose Depp.

Juno Temple

Leave it to Keely to dress up a neck brace!!

Charlotte Lawrence

This is gorg, I have no complaints.

Chloe Bailey in Robert Wun

Wow! (I feel like Sexy Glamorous Sea Creature is turning into a trend, which should be interesting and weird for the rest of us.)

Megalyn Echikunwoke

So....this is pretty spectacular, right?

Laura Harrier

Simple, easy, beautiful...boring? (Her face looks amazing, no doubt, however.)

Demi Lovato

She looks lovely in this BUT! I sort of wish she'd done something shorter and more FUN. This party is getting increasingly less party-y and more gala-y and I look to our musical celebrities to keep it kicky.

Richa Moorjani

This dress is great. Does she need different styling?

Diane Lane

Diane Lane is our Designated Sexy Tootsie for the evening.

Caylee Cowan

I LOVE this. I might have styled it somewhat differently but the dress itself is so dreamy and cool to me.

Chrissy Teigen and John Legend

This is a miss on Chrissy to me; I get it in theory but in practice, it looks a bit like she's wrapped fancy party bunting around her body. MAYBE SHE HAS.

Sheryl Lee Ralph in Sophie Couture

Simple, easy, gorgeous, not boring primarily because she has a whole cauldron of charisma.

Nina Dobrev

I actually really like this but -- and I cannot believe I'm typing this -- I'd have lost that necklace. It reminds me of the time a kid in my freshman dorm came home from rush with a bike lock around his neck. (He was fine. He was a VERY congenial bro.)

Thomasin McKenzie

I assume this is Chanel and I think it's rather wearing her than the other way around. I want to grab a lot of these younger actresses and tell them to wear something short to this party and kick up their heels! Love, Granny.

Minnie Driver

She held her train (??????) out like this in all the photos I saw and this felt highly unnecessary. I can't tell you how often I want to yell, "JUST STAND NORMAL" at people in the course of my job. Having said that: This dress IS great.

Corey Gamble and Kris Jenner in OdlR

Apologies to Corey Gamble for pulling a photo where he appears emotionally sedated.

Jeff Goldblum

Feels right.

The Oscars Post-Parties Brought PILES of Beaded and Metallics Looks

You will want to look through this one. It's just a fact.